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So I was out on Saturday night at a lounge/club with some friends, and some guy, who was much older than me (he was about 70, I'm in my early 30's) approaches me and says "I think I've seen you on a dating service", I got kinda embarrassed and said "no that's not me", even though I am on a dating site (not 100% sure if that's what he meant). He apologized and walked away, so I don't think it was a pick up line, I think he really saw me on there! haha!
Has this kind of stuff ever happened it to you guys, where you've gotten spotted?
I live in NYC, it's not like it's a small town where you're probably more likely to get spotted, so I was a bit thrown lol.
The reverse happened to me. I was spotted on OLD by a previous co-worker.. awkwaaaard!!
I try not too get insecure but I have so much more to offer then my friends and would like a woman that wants a LTR.
Don't worry Im not sweating it. If it happens great, if not I have lots of things to still do in the world its just easier alone but a little lonely. However that is where being social helps lol.
Also I have my POF and OKC for a few years now.....more then 3 and no hits.
I sent out hundreds of first messages, probably even thousands in the whole time I was OLD. Don't wait until people contact you first.
See, I think this sort of thing would be absolutely horrifying. I am waaay too paranoid for OLD lol
Well I used to be on a site that wasn't as popular as the one I'm on now. When I was on the old site, I never got spotted and wasn't even worried about it (I had been on there on and off for about 3 years). When I switched to the new site, I knew it was very popular so I was aware that I would very likely come across some people who are on there in my daily life, I just didn't think they'd come right out to you and say it! I still don't know 100% that if he really saw me on there, or if it was just a pick up line lol.
I guess one reason I don't have an issue with this is that I'm not really shy and I don't mind talking to anybody about much of anything. I'm friendly and outgoing. I'm not ashamed. I'm not on OLD because I can't find anyone IRL, I'm there because I don't have a whole lot of time to go out to this and that in the hopes of meeting people. Also because I find people-looking to be just...fun. People are interesting. Checking out profiles and talking to some of 'em has been enjoyable, whether it results in anything or not.
The reason it's a problem though, is this notion that some guys seem to have that because I've signaled availability, especially for sex, that I am available to anyone who wants it and shouldn't be choosy. Hey, just because I'm out there and might be down for casual with the right person does not mean I'm desperate and begging for any action I can get. I have had so many men in messages who just will not take a hint. The same guy who says in his profile, "If I say hello and you're not interested, please respond and let me know. Being ignored bothers me." Well, he only says that because if you respond he will not give up. Even when you flat out tell him that he's not what you're looking for, and even when you start asking weird questions like whether he's got any tattoos or might enjoy going to a concert with me and getting kicked in the head for fun. I told this one guy he just is not weird enough for my tastes. He said oh yes he is, because he likes doing it in places where he MIGHT GET CAUGHT! Yeah buddy. You're a freak alright. Possibly exposing yourself to families and scandalizing grannies by getting your nekkid on in a park or something. You rebel. It's these ones that I've clearly and nicely told that I'm not into them, but persist anyways, that I would really NOT want to meet in public...
Though I did have a lot of fun with another straightlaced guy who ignored my profile and just looked at my pics, and started talking to me...my game is now coming up with really ridiculous weird things to say to these people to scare them off...don't you pull a "but I'm a nice guy!" on ME! lol
I would have said something like "I remember you, you're the freak I showed to all my friends and we had a good laugh at your profile". He would have shut up then.
I never had this happen but have recognized several guys on it. I used to see this guy all the time on one. He mentioned where he worked and months later I saw him there. I never spoke to him though.
I'm curious on why it wouldn't be a good way to approach someone?
In theory, as something in common, it should be. But, it's really not that accepted now. Back in the day when OLD sites were free and the Craigslist Killer hadn't come around, times were more innocent.
Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182
I think lots of people still have a certain stigma about it when push comes to shove.
Sounds about right and most folks probably realize (at least on a site like POF, probably OKC as well) that they are dumpster diving. Nobody truly wants to feel so unlikable in person that they have to resort to the Innerwebz to find a person of the opposite gender to trade emails with. In the meantime, we'll see "About Me" sections starting with "Well, my friend told me about this site..."
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bananas84
Well at lease you guys have someone hitting you on it. I haven't had ONE person hit me on that....its giving me a complex and I know im not bad looking and all my friends read it and it was awesome....and when I told them the same they look at me like "wait what?"
OLD is totally a numbers game and you're likely to be the victim of a gal and the "delete" button en masse. Oh well. Really, getting hit on by women in person is so much better.
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Yeah buddy. You're a freak alright. Possibly exposing yourself to families and scandalizing grannies by getting your nekkid on in a park or something. 
You rebel. 
It's these ones that I've clearly and nicely told that I'm not into them, but persist anyways, that I would really NOT want to meet in public...
