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It is to me, and no it's not because I'm leaving my options open for something else. I've never wanted kids, and marriage has just never been a priority to me. I could change my mind, but at this point nothing has swayed me so far. I'm just happy I've reached the stage where marriage is as unimportant to women my age as it is to me. Makes life simpler. Now to others it is very significant and I respect that. Another case of different strokes.
I consider it as a big commercial moneymaker most of the time. Marriage is big business, big money.
For some it's just to satisfy elders who're still locked into customs and religions.
For others that piece of paper is like a security blanket...it's the proof that they require...the proof that shows that they've made a commitment to be with another.
If there were no more rights given to the married than are given to the just living togethers I sometimes think a lot of people wouldn't bother.
To me, and my significant other of 40 years...yes, it really IS just a piece of paper....that's evidenced by the 50% divorce rate I think.
We've enjoyed our lives together and raised 4 children, and a marriage certificate {really} had nothing to do with it.
It isn't for me. I have been in a few long term relationships. The guys never asked me to marry them. I was not important enough I suppose... most of them have all gone on to marry the very next woman they dated. To me, if a guy does not want to marry me, then I will be kicking him to the curb because I have wasted too much time for the guys who had me for a right now and not a forever. So to me, it is more of a show of they actually really want to be with me for the reason I want someone to be with me. Not a convenience.
I consider it as a big commercial moneymaker most of the time. Marriage is big business, big money.
Eh. It's only as big a moneymaker as you let it be.
Here, a marriage license is $58. Officiant fees vary.
Marriage isn't a big business. The wedding/event planning industry sure is, but "marriage" and "wedding" are not the same things, although they are often used and thought about interchangeably.
It isn't for me. I have been in a few long term relationships. The guys never asked me to marry them. I was not important enough I suppose... most of them have all gone on to marry the very next woman they dated. To me, if a guy does not want to marry me, then I will be kicking him to the curb because I have wasted too much time for the guys who had me for a right now and not a forever. So to me, it is more of a show of they actually really want to be with me for the reason I want someone to be with me. Not a convenience.
Aww. Sorry to hear that. I have experienced that too and I walked away. To be in a relationship for years and it to not progress further was not something I was looking for. And I was also told "it is just a piece of paper, you can have commitment without it." And then I realized he wasn't committed to me either but I was to him.
Aww. Sorry to hear that. I have experienced that too and I walked away. To be in a relationship for years and it to not progress further was not something I was looking for. And I was also told "it is just a piece of paper, you can have commitment without it." And then I realized he wasn't committed to me either but I was to him.
That is EXACTLY what they would tell me!!!! Here I am, 30 years old, and still single!
That is EXACTLY what they would tell me!!!! Here I am, 30 years old, and still single!
I decided to no longer drop years into someone once I can see writing on the wall. Someone that loves you will make you first; they will know pretty early on if they want to be with you long-term. The mistake I made before is I bought all the BS excuses on why my prior relationship could not go to the next level. I wanted to believe that you did not need to be married to prove you are committed, but to be honest, I really did want that commitment regardless of what others kept saying. I do not see marriage as a piece of paper at all.
I was simply just a placeholder while that person continued to look. He had someone to hang out with, sleep with and cook for him in the meantime. I am now engaged to someone that treats me well and has made it very clear how he feels for me. It is a completely different experience from that dead-end relationship from before.
I am sure there is someone out there for you. 30 is still young; I am actually slightly older than you. Keep your chin up. Cut people off that waste your time.
What it boils down to is if you are both wanting the same things. There are couples that never marry and that is fine for them, I am just not one of those people is all.
Last edited by jabber_wocky; 06-23-2015 at 10:55 AM..
It was clear for both of us that we are going to make it official via "piece of paper" . It is piece of paper in negative meaning , it is easy and fast to divorce if there is a need for it. But it is valuable commitment and has influence for some legal rights, in positivive meaning this litle piece of paper has big influence in things. It is not just commitment between me and my hubby but it is also commitment with society, laws and rules. And it is nice to mark this box "married" in documents, lol
I do not see it as "just a piece of paper" nor do I think a longterm, unmarried couple lacks a commitment.
My SO and I have considered marriage before for various practical reasons (mainly stemming from the fact that we are of different nationalities) but I do not think it would change--any by that I mean improve or degrade--our already long, mostly happy union. Our relationship is the commitment--our intertwined lives, our share home, our love for one another and our sticking it out through the rough patches. No one is looking for an easy out here. Others prefer to be legally wed as a sign of commitment and that's fine too.
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