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I have been dating someone for almost a month now, and we sort of got into it over money. She makes closer to 50k in a city where it is hard to make that much. She has done well for herself and has only held 3 jobs in her life time and she got this one when she was 18 and has been at her job for 12 years now. Its cool that she is successful, but she told me that she would not date a person that ever worked at Mcdonalds. I asked her why not? I mean, my standards are as long as you have a job and you can afford your bills, then we are straight. FWIW, I make a little over 30k and I do not work at Mcdonalds.
I don't make as much as she does, and when she says things like this, it really makes me uncomfortable. She admits that she lives in a bubble and can be judgmental, which is funny because she and her family are not perfect. I just don't understand how someone can be so judgmental when they are not perfect themselves.
Because I work at a at will state, it worries me that if there was another recession and I was to lose my job that she would leave. I dont know if this is gold digging behavior or what. She says that she just wants to have the same level of living. I told her what happens if she were to lose her job or something else happened. Not everyone starts at the top and she had help. I also told her that at 50k, she is not rich just middle class, and we both are just "average americans". I guess I am more humble than most because I grew up poor while she did not. I don't know, what do you guys think?
Money is a hot button issue for a lot of people. You make need to accept the fact that she's this way. If you can accept that and are ok with it then proceed. If not, well, make a plan to see about separating.
I personally find money and status seekers to be off putting.
For what its worth 50k isn't really much to be bragging about.....just an FYI.....
Well in her defense, her husband didn't work, and i get that she doesn't want to go through that again, but like i told her, you are trying so hard that its off putting. I have a job, have always held a job, and you make me feel bad for not making as much as you. She said sorry, but Idk. I mean yeah her ex had a job and he couldn't keep it, but I kinda wonder if the reason that they didn't have problems was because she was always nagging him about it.
Well in her defense, her husband didn't work, and i get that she doesn't want to go through that again, but like i told her, you are trying so hard that its off putting. I have a job, have always held a job, and you make me feel bad for not making as much as you. She said sorry, but Idk. I mean yeah her ex had a job and he couldn't keep it, but I kinda wonder if the reason that they didn't have problems was because she was always nagging him about it.
First off, isn't nonya on why her husband couldn't keep a job and secondly she might be the type to always think less of you because you aren't 'ballin'
Not to be negative here, just laying it out there.
I think it is important for a couple to be on the same page with it comes to financial goals. If she places a high priority on her partner's income to fund a lifestyle and future expects, then it is going to be and will always be a "hot button' thing with her.
I personally could care less as long as they are capable of doing their share to support the family. I didn't want to nor did I marry a dependent.
Remember.... a large portion of divorces in the US are due to money/finances.
I have been dating someone for almost a month now, and we sort of got into it over money. She makes closer to 50k in a city where it is hard to make that much. She has done well for herself and has only held 3 jobs in her life time and she got this one when she was 18 and has been at her job for 12 years now. Its cool that she is successful, but she told me that she would not date a person that ever worked at Mcdonalds. I asked her why not? I mean, my standards are as long as you have a job and you can afford your bills, then we are straight. FWIW, I make a little over 30k and I do not work at Mcdonalds.
I don't make as much as she does, and when she says things like this, it really makes me uncomfortable. She admits that she lives in a bubble and can be judgmental, which is funny because she and her family are not perfect. I just don't understand how someone can be so judgmental when they are not perfect themselves.
Because I work at a at will state, it worries me that if there was another recession and I was to lose my job that she would leave. I dont know if this is gold digging behavior or what. She says that she just wants to have the same level of living. I told her what happens if she were to lose her job or something else happened. Not everyone starts at the top and she had help. I also told her that at 50k, she is not rich just middle class, and we both are just "average americans". I guess I am more humble than most because I grew up poor while she did not. I don't know, what do you guys think?
She's been there 12 years and only makes 50k? How is this a big deal with you making 30k? Sheesh.
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First off, isn't nonya on why her husband couldn't keep a job and secondly she might be the type to always think less of you because you aren't 'ballin'
Not to be negative here, just laying it out there.
Well she made it my business when she told me, i didn't ask.
I think it is important for a couple to be on the same page with it comes to financial goals. If she places a high priority on her partner's income to fund a lifestyle and future expects, then it is going to be and will always be a "hot button' thing with her.
I personally could care less as long as they are capable of doing their share to support the family. I didn't want to nor did I marry a dependent.
Remember.... a large portion of divorces in the US are due to money/finances.
If? They?
Well does she or doesn't she? Is she or isn't she?
Almost like you're talking about someone who isn't actually real...
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