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Well, I'm not in a relationship because I know a woman is gonna force me to do things I don't like. I'd rather be alone than be controlled. My mother tried this on me as a child and I nearly resented her for it. So, she gave me the choice and I have never celebrated Christmas because that's my right and she respects that. Why is it ok for a woman to do what they want but a man can't?
My opinion wouldn't change if the roles were reversed and she was the gringe. It has nothing to do with man vs woman, it has everything to do with a relationship.
Whether it's an intimate relationship, friendship, or a family, there are gives and takes to everyone of those. Sometimes you don't always get what you want or do everything you want.
You call it controlling, fine, call it that all you want, but to most people that's called being selfish and not holding up your end of the relationship.
I do things for my wife that I can assure you I don't want to do, in fact i have inlaws coming into town today to celebrate Christmas late, the last thing I want to do is have company in my house. Guess what? My children want to see their grandparents and my wife wants to see her parents, I'm a total jackass if I tell them not to come or I leave the house. My wife does things for me she doesnt want to do either, but at the end of the day doing things together and being there for each other is what makes us happy.
If you call that being controlled, maybe it's a good thing you arent in a relationship.
My opinion wouldn't change if the roles were reversed and she was the gringe. It has nothing to do with man vs woman, it has everything to do with a relationship.
Whether it's an intimate relationship, friendship, or a family, there are gives and takes to everyone of those. Sometimes you don't always get what you want or do everything you want.
You call it controlling, fine, call it that all you want, but to most people that's called being selfish and not holding up your end of the relationship.
I do things for my wife that I can assure you I don't want to do, in fact i have inlaws coming into town today to celebrate Christmas late, the last thing I want to do is have company in my house. Guess what? My children want to see their grandparents and my wife wants to see her parents, I'm a total jackass if I tell them not to come or I leave the house. My wife does things for me she doesnt want to do either, but at the end of the day doing things together and being there for each other is what makes us happy.
If you call that being controlled, maybe it's a good thing you arent in a relationship.
It is. My own mother doesn't tell me what to do anymore because I'm a grown man. You think I'm gonna let a random woman do that to me? Not a chance.
It is. My own mother doesn't tell me what to do anymore because I'm a grown man. You think I'm gonna let a random woman do that to me? Not a chance.
I think you are confusing compromising for the sake of someone you love and being controlled against your will. In a relationship you compromise if you love someone because you know it makes them happy.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,748,461 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 49ersfan27
It is. My own mother doesn't tell me what to do anymore because I'm a grown man. You think I'm gonna let a random woman do that to me? Not a chance.
Dude, I usually agree with you but you gotta realize if you want to keep a woman happy, sometimes you have to do like this. If you go into a relationship refusing to do anything she wants, you won't be with her long.
Dude, I usually agree with you but you gotta realize if you want to keep a woman happy, sometimes you have to do like this. If you go into a relationship refusing to do anything she wants, you won't be with her long.
I think in my case when you get used to doing things on your own and doing whatever you want on your own terms. You get stuck in your ways. That's one of the core reasons I haven't dated in half of a year. If I got into a relationship my independence is gone.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
26,700 posts, read 41,748,461 times
Reputation: 41381
Quote:
Originally Posted by 49ersfan27
I think in my case when you get used to doing things on your own and doing whatever you want on your own terms. You get stuck in your ways. That's one of the core reasons I haven't dated in half of a year. If I got into a relationship my independence is gone.
I totally understand where you come from. I know if I get into a relationship I have to use the dreaded c word; compromise. But, please believe, I have a strict limit.
I think you are confusing compromising for the sake of someone you love and being controlled against your will. In a relationship you compromise if you love someone because you know it makes them happy.
Hmmmm.. I haven't met a woman who has made me felt that way before if I did my stance would probably change. Some days I think I am too independent because I shut women out thinking they'll control me.
I totally understand where you come from. I know if I get into a relationship I have to use the dreaded c word; compromise. But, please believe, I have a strict limit.
One of the things I'll have change about myself for the new year. I gotta stop treating women as villains who are out to get me.
One of the things I'll have change about myself for the new year. I gotta stop treating women as villains who are out to get me.
It's not a bad thing to have your guard up, because it can protect you from getting involved with the wrong women... but you also have to be careful not to shut the good ones out.
Dude, I usually agree with you but you gotta realize if you want to keep a woman happy, sometimes you have to do like this. If you go into a relationship refusing to do anything she wants, you won't be with her long.
And let's not forget there are kids involved, here. This really isn't a "couple" issue, it's a family issue.
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like this. If you go into a relationship refusing to do anything she wants, you won't be with her long.
It's not a bad thing to have your guard up, because it can protect you from getting involved with the wrong women... but you also have to be careful not to shut the good ones out.
