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I don't mind my friends setting up me up with guys, as long as they know what kind of guys I like. For instance, gotta be 5'11"/6'0"+ I'm not romantically attracted to shorter guys. Been down that happy road, it dead-ends into Friendshipland.
I wish my friends would try to set me up not because i think it would work but at least it means they think theres actually people out there who would go out with me
I had a man friend try to hook me up with a great guy he knew. We had a lot in common so I thought I would give it a try.. Our first date, we went out to eat and to get the conversation going I asked him about his job.. He said he didn't want to talk about work, work was work and he was not there to discuss his job.. Ok.. So I changed the conversation to computers (another common interest we had).. Then he started talking about work and that was the conversation of the whole date... his job! Everything that was wrong with his job and all he did was complain about it..
We talked a lot on the phone after the first date and I found he constantly criticized everything in my life. The choice of car that I had, the choice of computer I had, the way I did things, my beliefs.. anything and everything.. Hummmm, my life was fine with me, I had no problems with any of the choices I had made. I even love my job and we worked in the same industry while he hated his?
This was NOT the kind of person I even wanted to talk to much less be around so I quit answering his calls.
3 months later, the friend that tried to hooked us up told me he had gotten married. I told that friend DO NOT EVER try to hook me up again with anyone!
I was reminiscing (i.e., bringing back horrid memories) of bad dates in another thread. My friend claimed the reason for setting me up with this creepy guy was because we were both nerds in high school. HUH?!
Other friends have tried to set me up as well---one biracial friend who dates older, White men tried to hook me up with a middle-aged White man. Mind you, I'm in my 20's (as is my friend) and not middle-aged. Her reasons for his being a good catch was that he "loves showing off his money and has a temper" (who to the what now?!). I saw his photo and he looked like Mr. Clean. That was a no.
Another biracial friend likes dating middle-aged Black and minority men. She described this guy friend of hers when we were out and said he wanted to meet me. The way she described him was like Ricky Martin, but he was short, bald, old, drunken and creepy! That was also a no.
Are these friends trying to set people up on dates out of the goodness of their hearts, or are they just trying to instigate? With the first two female friends, they weren't putting my likes and interests in mind, they thought about what they liked and went with that. And with my other friend, she didn't look beyond the outside appearance for a match.
Like I said in the other thread, I've been single for quite a while. During this time, I realized that there are a lot of things I need to work on before I open myself up to someone else. If I ever considered blind dating again, maybe Cupid's shot would be more accurate if I had a less negative outlook on life.
It's amazing that people always look for an absolute answer. Toby Keith needs to write a song about dating similar to "I love this bar".
It's both, all three, all four all whatever you can come up with.
Same on here..you got people THAT ACTUALLY ARE OUT THERE DATING SHARING THEIR EXPERIANCE, AWARENESS, SENSATIVITY, FAILURES AND SUCCESSES. And then at the other end of the spectrum you get people who have been married since they were twelve to their cousin, the first and only person they ever had sex with, and they actually never "dated" because it could have led to premarital sex. and they respond to "I just found out he's a serial killer should I stop dating him?" with "maybe he'll change, give him another chance, love and hope springs eternal." And they cannot understand how annoying it is to see them take a singular stance, or basic tennant to the grave with every advice they give..that being "stay with them no matter what". This is relationship advice, not jehovah witness advice.
A friend attempting to set me up really has never worked! "You can't force it happen and you can't just learn to love someone"
I had a friend in college who tried to set me up with a good friend of hers (who was seeing someone else at the same time!!) and it totally bombed on me. The girl in question was quite attractive (great body, etc...), but she was very obsessive/compulsive and EXTREMELY possessive.
She even STalked me on occasion, following me around town. "I still, to this day, have no idea why she wanted to stalk me!"
Once, she followed me to a restaurant, got out of her car and confronted me in the parking lott! and proceeded to lambast me because she "thought" she saw me talking to another girl when a group of us were at a ballgame.
And, all the while, she had a steady "boyfriend"
I told her friend, who tried to set us up, never again
I wish my friends would try to set me up not because i think it would work but at least it means they think theres actually people out there who would go out with me
Would you trust your friends to pick your lunch or what to wear? Friends and family may mean well, but rarely do they know you well enough to know what's best for you. And I really hate when friends set me up with someone just because we're both single.
Acquaintances try to set you up. Friends just say "Are you nuts? Have another beer!"
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