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Online dating. I've had a few dates the last few weeks with varied chemistry matches. This one was a definite no go.
One guy who I have seen a few times definitely confuses me. He seems to really like me and I definitely enjoy spending time with him but our dates are weeks to months apart because he's in the army. I just can't tell if I like him as friend or more. I don't want to lead him on but I'm very unsure.
Why would a guy write a text message 15 minutes after a first date stating he had fun and thanks for having dinner with him only to get my hopes up? After this I responded politely that I had a good time as well and thanks. After a few days I wrote him and he replied but he never initiated a text and never asked for a second date. Why bother to say you had fun and send a text immediately after the date and then change your mind?
Being Polite which is done by men and women after a 1st date.
I've had a number of guys do that. From my own personal experiences, it's been a way to keep you "around" so he could contact you months later and think you still would meet him again, he's stupid, or he did that but then met someone else. Personally I believe men know on a first date if they want to see you again. Once you say your goodbyes, if not interested to meet again don't make contact period.
So if a man or woman texts after a date to say they had a good time but don't ask for a second date they are wrong?
Then if a man or woman does not text after a date to say they had a good time and just cut contact they are wrong?
Exactly how is one supposed to get anything right with that type of logic and requirements?
OP: I think the guy was being polite and I see no reason for you to have high hopes when there was no indication on his part for anything more than the words he wrote.
I've had a number of guys do that. From my own personal experiences, it's been a way to keep you "around" so he could contact you months later and think you still would meet him again, he's stupid, or he did that but then met someone else. Personally I believe men know on a first date if they want to see you again. Once you say your goodbyes, if not interested to meet again don't make contact period.
That's a good point
Yes I can see a few blokes that would do that and yes THEY ARE STUPID!!! , and don't actually realise that their absence proves that they are not that interested.
It's a stupid way to go about dating in truth and a complete waste of time IMO, plus there was a thread last year of some nutter that purposely waits between 3-5 days to get in contact to try and organise another date.....
FWIW I usually know within 15 minutes if not quicker of meeting someone if they are for me or not .... Or if I'm for them ( either way it won't work ) and without fail I always make a point of arranging to see them again on the date and in person, as it's not right to not keep her guessing or wondering " how did the date go " and I can see her facial expression, manner, attitude etc towards me that you can't see via texting.
Yes I can see a few blokes that would do that and yes THEY ARE STUPID!!! , and don't actually realise that their absence proves that they are not that interested.
It's a stupid way to go about dating in truth and a complete waste of time IMO, plus there was a thread last year of some nutter that purposely waits between 3-5 days to get in contact to try and organise another date.....
FWIW I usually know within 15 minutes if not quicker of meeting someone if they are for me or not .... Or if I'm for them ( either way it won't work ) and without fail I always make a point of arranging to see them again on the date and in person, as it's not right to not keep her guessing or wondering " how did the date go " and I can see her facial expression, manner, attitude etc towards me that you can't see via texting.
Yeah I prefer on a first date that the guy (if interested of course) asks me out for another date and we make plans right then and there. Seems like today that's not the norm though.
Don't people usually plan a 2nd date before the 1st one ends? I've always assumed if the 1st ends without a 2nd then, there is no more. My 2 pennies.
That's been my experience.
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) and without fail I always make a point of arranging to see them again on the date and in person, as it's not right to not keep her guessing or wondering " how did the date go " and I can see her facial expression, manner, attitude etc towards me that you can't see via texting.
