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Agreed with the posters who stated that the depression and anxiety issues should be taken care of before dating another woman. Women don't like those traits and would pose serious problems in any relationship.
Why don't you try dating women at your university?
Haha, yes--the obvious thing. You're already in the perfect environment to meet women, OP. You could join some kind of group on campus, or keep your eye out for interesting students in your program and related programs. Are you an undergraduate, or in grad school?
You're going to be single forever bro. I would look into prostitution. It can be a real slump buster. Women can tell when a guy is getting some. Bang a few hotties and ge back out there.
Paying for sex is a beautiful thing. it will fix a lot of your problems. Your confidence is gone right now. Work on that.
Your not ugly by any means however I would consider on going to the gym and lifting weights and eating more. That will help build confidence and make you more attractive to some women. It has also allowed me to continue a more productive life style which I think you can benifit from. You seem like an intellectual man so I'm pretty sure you can have meaningful conversations. What are your hobbies?
I like cycling and bowling. I used to lift weights before, but my muscles shrank, and so far I have a chronic pain in my chest muscles.
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Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
OP, I think I read about half of it. I, too, like Liberty2011, think the depression and anxiety would be an obstacle to a successful long term relationship, and even if it isn't, your happiness shouldn't be so dependent on another person. Because what happens if there's a breakup? The depression returns. Or a rough patch in the relationship--you might have difficulty handling it. I don't know anything about your life story, but depression often has its roots in early life. If you go into therapy, try to find someone who can help you get to the root of it, and heal whatever that root cause is. There are many different kinds of therapists out there, and not all of them are equipped to do this.
I couldn't access your photo. A nice, contemporary style of eyewear can help, depending. If you get the right shape and style (for example: rimless or half-rim, compared to heavy frames), it can look good. You can see a dermatologist to see if anything can be done about your skin/face. Diet might make a difference.
Forget the "alpha/beta" stuff, and just be yourself. A sense of humor can be very attractive. "Self control", hmm.... As long as you don't wall yourself off completely from your emotions, which isn't healthy.... Showing some vulnerability and ability to empathize with others are what make us human, and are attractive traits. I''m not sure what you mean by "self control", but I'll leave that up to your judgment.
As to how/where to meet women, you can join a bowling league, if that's what you like: a mixed-gender group. You could join a mixed-gender cycling club. You like art? Go to art gallery exhibit openings (they're usually once/month), when they have the opening reception. It's a good opportunity to socialize. You like movies? Consider volunteering for a film festival in your town or nearby.
I think it's really cool that you wrote such a good paper! (I respect good writing skills! )You seem to be off to a good start in your career path. This is good. Also, you seem to do pretty well meeting women on your own, and you seem to hit it off now and then with women. Even though it hasn't worked out due to age, etc., these are good signs. Take heart from that. You're actually well ahead of some men who post here. Be patient.
I hope there's something helpful for you here. Good luck!
I appreciate your encouragement
Self-control means that it is not that easy to make me angry. I would consider joining a bowling league and a cycling club. I did not have those in mind before.
Right now I practically never meet women, but want to see how to meet them more frequently, but not without making it different this time.
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Originally Posted by bullandre
Agreed with the posters who stated that the depression and anxiety issues should be taken care of before dating another woman. Women don't like those traits and would pose serious problems in any relationship.
Why don't you try dating women at your university?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth
Haha, yes--the obvious thing. You're already in the perfect environment to meet women, OP. You could join some kind of group on campus, or keep your eye out for interesting students in your program and related programs. Are you an undergraduate, or in grad school?
I have already tried to approach women in the university's campus. Most women there tend to be busy minding their homeworks and exams.
A student is what suits me well, and would consider a graduate one as an ideal choice, but there is none in my classes. I may join graduate students support group as they may share similar mentality and concerns.
My desires to exert more efforts to date and meet women revived just a few days ago, and it seems that a lot is yet to be done.
I like cycling and bowling. I used to lift weights before, but my muscles shrank, and so far I have a chronic pain in my chest muscles.
Have you seen a doctor for your chronic pain?
Quote:
I have already tried to approach women in the university's campus. Most women there tend to be busy minding their homeworks and exams.
I doubt that! I have been on many college campuses and "most women" are not turning down guys for their studies. Here's a tip. Do not lie to yourself to make yourself feel better. You will end up like some of our male posters here who managed to get into their late 20s with zero self awareness. Self-deception is a dangerous habit.
One last question. How did you date a woman for a month, spend the night in her bed a dozen times, and still say you have only had a "first kiss"? Why did you deny her and yourself sexual intimacy?
I am sorry, but that it very outside the realm of normal behavior.
I approached around 100 in one month before and no attempt paid off; they were either busy, told me they have a BF, or things did not go well from the very beginning. After these attempts, I nearly stopped approaching women.
Wouldn’t it be better to make it happen more natural and spontaneous situations? If so, it would mean that I need to find some places or events; places where women would rather want to socialize than feel I am exerting an effort to make them do so.
100 people in a month. That must have been very awkward for them.
Yes, you would do much better to meet women more naturally and get to know them over time before hitting on them.
I don't think online is going to be a very good venue for you.
Doing the therapy and developing your social skills will probably be a great investment for you. If your conversational style is anything like your writing style (way too analytical and dry), you are definitely going to struggle until you fix that.
OP, I think I read about half of it. I, too, like Liberty2011, think the depression and anxiety would be an obstacle to a successful long term relationship, and even if it isn't, your happiness shouldn't be so dependent on another person. Because what happens if there's a breakup? The depression returns. Or a rough patch in the relationship--you might have difficulty handling it.
Yep, that's why I asked. I appreciate the time the OP took to compose his post, but ultimately it is the depression, anxiety, and also he mentioned chronic pain, that will hinder his ability to form a healthy relationship.
And quite frankly, I realize the OP wanted to be as detailed as possible, but the whole post is very "all about me and what I want and what I need", and very little in the way of what he has to offer a woman. So many people fall into this trap of focusing only on what they want and can get out of a relationship. It matters just as much what you can offer to another. Why would someone want to be in a relationship with you? What positive qualities and attributes do you have and what can you add to their life? Healthy people aren't looking to date people who are a burden to them.
The answer is always going to be to work on yourself first, but so many insist on looking outside themselves rather than inward, and wonder why they're stuck. It's never everyone else, it's you.
Ok, I looked at your OKC profile, very brave for you to post a link for the world to see.
However: Do not use terms like Alpha male, you do not 'look' like an alpha male, it is all in your head and should be tossed out. A poster told you she stopped reading your profile after seeing this phrase, and all you did was justify it as being a wonderful thing. It's not, women with a clue shut down when they hear that. They will tell you that here, they're not just saying that because they're 'feminazi's' we don't like catch phrases, buzzwords, and other hints from another planet that indicate you've been reading PUA or Advice from Red Pill online. Only real life experience gets you real insight.
Next: Use the picture of yourself in the camel colored coat as your main photo, much better than the one you have now which depicts a guy who could possibly be 20 or younger.
Last-- if I ever read the following in a profile, my head would be yelling 'no, no. no! move on..." "... I am looking for a woman I could love from all of my heart...My major relationship-based goal is to find a woman to build affection with. A woman to treat like a mature, independent, and respectable human as an adult, but, still, like a lovely little girl as far as playfulness and teasing are concerned."
That's it. If you think you're ready to date, no alpha male, looking for love, or teasing little girls.
Just a good picture and interesting things you like, as a guy looking to meet a woman to go out and experience whatever Fargo has to offer.
I am looking for a woman to emotionally, take the ownership of my cases.
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Originally Posted by Aldaoudeyeh
But once it happened, I wanted to get a relationship with a woman here, mainly because I want to settle down and want someone to, emotionally, take ownership of my cases.
What does that mean?
I have never heard that phrase before...
Like others have said, you need to take care of your issues before you can date.
And you need to loosen up. Hopefully, your conversation skills are not as stilted and formal as your writing skills!
And you need to loosen up. Hopefully, your conversation skills are not as stilted and formal as your writing skills!
Right, I realize that he's trying to provide as much information as possible, and that there may be a language barrier happening, but dating should be fun and light and not read like a technical manual.
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(I respect good writing skills! 
)You seem to be off to a good start in your career path. This is good. Also, you seem to do pretty well meeting women on your own, and you seem to hit it off now and then with women. Even though it hasn't worked out due to age, etc., these are good signs. Take heart from that. You're actually well ahead of some men who post here. Be patient. 
