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Old 03-06-2017, 02:57 PM
 
Location: So Cal
52,249 posts, read 52,655,546 times
Reputation: 52761

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Quote:
Originally Posted by zentropa View Post
OK, so why does any of this matter? Do you think you can use your powers to turn him into something he is not?

Either he is into you or he isn't. And if he is, either you find his flirty behaviour with other women acceptable, or not.

You can't change him.
I agree, she mentioned she thought he was attractive, well, he better damn well be to be entertaining more thoughts of him. Like I posted I hate flaky behavior, being flirty and not doing what you say you're going to do doesn't work for me. I personally find people who are overly flirty to be annoying and attention seeking. That alone turns me off. I'm too old to play games anymore I guess. She could look like Salma Hayek and I'd pass on it she acted like the OP is describing.
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Old 03-06-2017, 02:59 PM
 
Location: In a place beyond human comprehension
8,923 posts, read 7,719,216 times
Reputation: 16662
I don't get it.

Instead of waiting around, why not tell the guy you like him?

You seem to be making this more difficult than it is.

It's not really about the event, although I understand the irritation/disappointment.
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Old 03-06-2017, 07:01 PM
 
Location: sumter
12,970 posts, read 9,651,799 times
Reputation: 10432
Quote:
Originally Posted by bebe182 View Post
So this guy I’ve kinda been crushing on for a while, promised me that he would show to an event this Friday which is a bi-monthly event. Low and behold he never showed, I kinda half expected it but because he promising me so vehemently that he would be there and even brought it up himself a couple of times the last time I saw him, I was a bit surprised he didn't show. Obviously at first I was disappointed but the more the I thought about it the more I kinda understood why he might’ve not shown.

First off, I don’t think he knows I have a thing for him, me asking if he was going doesn’t mean anything because he knows I go all the time, and ask other people if they’re going too. Secondly, while he has been to these events before (rarely) he never stays long, he doesn’t seem to enjoy them and even looks uncomfortable. The times he’s seen me at these events I’ll talk to him for 5-10 min and then walk away and talk to others since I’m friendly with a lot of people at these events, and like I said he typically goes for one drink and then leaves. I had only seen him stay all night once, and that was the first time he went and he was with a close friend of his whom stuck to all night.


That being said, I don’t know if I should bring it up to him the next time I see him that he promised and never showed up in a friendly light hearted manner, or if I just shouldn’t say anything?

BTW I do understand that there’s a possiblity he might bring it up himself, but I’m asking in case he doesn’t because from what I know about him he is a bit ditsy. Also we do not have each others contact info so he wouldn’t have been able to text or email me that he wasn’t going.
That feeling of being uncomfortable probably override the promise he made to you. And since he have no clue how you feel about him, I would say nothing. I wouldn't want to force a person into a situation they are not comfortable with.
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Old 03-10-2017, 09:51 PM
 
Location: At the Lake (in Texas)
2,320 posts, read 2,558,074 times
Reputation: 5970
Quote:
Originally Posted by Aery11 View Post
If you are going to say anything at all, stop being so coy and say something like .. "Missed seeing you at that 'event' .. hoped you would be there .. we should get together for a coffee sometime .. here is my number/contact information". If you just keep hoping to randomly bump into him, this could go on for years and you will just end up frustrated. Find out if he is worth crushing on and/or whether he even wants to spend an hour with you over coffee.
Great advice! OP, definitely do this!
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