if your date did not finish their meal (Chinese, husband, reason)

[Ruth4Truth]

Originally Posted by TabulaRasa

Actually, in light of recent posts, I'd find it really offputting if I were on a date and my date "started probing into why I wasn't eating my food," or appeared to be monitoring "what progress I'd made" on my food.

lol! It sounds funny when it gets over-analyzed on a forum, but it could just be a considerate gesture, like: "Everything ok?" without making a big deal of it.

[TabulaRasa]

I would agree, if the overall tone were that there were some type of concern for the date.

However, it reads mainly as irritation that somebody was expected to pay for a meal that went uneaten (along with some implied concern that he thought he could have potentially been double charged if he'd pursued getting a replacement entree).

I guess someone reading it could read "genuine concern" for one's date into what was written; I didn't personally see it.

Also, directly quoting what somebody posts isn't necessarily "overanalysis." It's really just noting what was said.

[Mikala43]

I think both parties on the date were lacking manners. He didn't show concern, and she made awkward just sitting there and not eating. If I were her, I wouldn't go on a 2nd date, and if I was him I wouldn't go on a 2nd date.

[Ruth4Truth]

Originally Posted by k374

I think you did not read my post, I definitely can deal with these situation, thank you for your insults I chose not to because I think it was ridiculous to not pay attention to what you are ordering and then waste your food. That is extremely bad form. That food is going in the dumpster and could've been utilized in a better way. Of course you consider yourself such a hot shot so you probably don't care about these things

OP, you're getting hung up on the wastage. The best thing to do in a social situation like that is to overlook things like that, and make sure your guest is comfortable. So even though one may object to food being wasted, the bigger picture is that you're on a date, you've invited someone to share a meal with you, so you focus on that. You do the gentlemanly thing, and do your best to see that your guest doesn't starve; you politely insist that it's ok, you'll get the server back to get another meal for your guest. (Even if you're not ok with it. That's what being a good host is about.)


I do agree with you, though, that your date was remiss, because she read all the ingredients of all the burger offerings on the menu, ruled ALL of them out except the one she ordered, and even that one wasn't acceptable? Maybe the poor girl isn't into burgers?? But even though she screwed up, you're supposed to do what you can to see that your date has a good time. You don't let on that you're ticked, you just do whatever it takes to get through the date, lol. Then you can dump her afterwards, for being picky and flakey, if you want.

[Mikala43]

She has the same obligation. ^^^^^^

She could have done a bunch of stuff to fix the situation.

[convextech]

Originally Posted by k374

went on a date recently where my date ordered something, she did not like one of the ingredients (sundried tomato paste on a gourmet burger) in the dish so she did not eat it.
...
Personally I felt she was just too picky

I would never ask her out again.

I had a date at a very expensive restaurant and I ordered foie gras because I'd only ever heard of it. It was disgusting. But I ate the whole thing because, well, I ordered it.

[Ruth4Truth]

Originally Posted by Mikala43

She has the same obligation. ^^^^^^

She could have done a bunch of stuff to fix the situation.

Yes. I was going to add that, but decided not to. She could have said she wanted to order a different meal and that she'd pay for it. The OP then could have gone with that, or he could have said he'd cover it. But the root of the problem seemed to be that she found herself in a restaurant where she didn't like anything on the menu.

OP, did you discuss the dinner venue with her in advance? I'm wondering if she has a problem with asserting herself in general, like saying, "I'm not really that into burgers, could we try something else? Do you like Thai?" before you even arrived at the dinner place.

[ipaper]

Originally Posted by convextech

I would never ask her out again.

I had a date at a very expensive restaurant and I ordered foie gras because I'd only ever heard of it. It was disgusting. But I ate the whole thing because, well, I ordered it.

I'm sorry, I could never eat something disgusting that I hate. That is just torture to me, and I would not be able to swallow down a whole serving of it. I would have to order something else, waste or no waste wouldn't even be an issue. The last person I would want to torture is myself, no way.

[hawaiiancoconut]

A Jumbo Jack isn't going to send you to poor house, guy. Take the burger she didn't want home to eat later and order her another one. No food is wasted

Dinner dates isn't that difficult, but you sure make it out to be, Lol

[Mikala43]

Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth

Yes. I was going to add that, but decided not to. She could have said she wanted to order a different meal and that she'd pay for it. The OP then could have gone with that, or he could have said he'd cover it. But the root of the problem seemed to be that she found herself in a restaurant where she didn't like anything on the menu.

OP, did you discuss the dinner venue with her in advance? I'm wondering if she has a problem with asserting herself in general, like saying, "I'm not really that into burgers, could we try something else? Do you like Thai?" before you even arrived at the dinner place.

I missed the part where she disliked everything.

Still, you can order fries - who doesn't like fries?

If she knew in advance she should have offered an alternative.

I'm not sure why the communication is so non-existent here. For the most part, I feel it falls on her.