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Nothing new here, it's just the whole who-pays-for-the-1st-date ordeal. I'm going on my 1st date (in 2 years) tonight with a guy I have been talking with for 2 weeks. I like him a lot and I believe the feeling is mutual, but all that will be confirmed tonight. So my question is, how do I approach the bill situation without sending the wrong signals? I don't want to come off as a freeloader so I would have liked to pay or meet halfway. But I understand some guys would interpret that as perhaps I'm no longer interested. Should I just let him pay? Would this be a big deal for the 40+ crowd?
Yes I sound naive, I know, but I haven't done these things in a long time.
So I'll sit tight waiting to hear from you, and in the meantime, I will worry about what to wear tonight.
Who asked whom out?
That person pays. If I ask a guy out, I pay.
Why not do something that involves 2 things, like coffee and movie and pay for one.
Strangely, I always enjoyed mini-golf for a first date because it was minimally active, outdoors and non-threatening. Then ice cream or coffee. You could split something like that.
When the bill comes you can ask him "Can I help you with that?"
This seems like a good response.
If you're having a good time, ask if you can take him for a drink, coffee, tea, ice cream or whatever afterwards if he says that he's got the meal.
That might make you feel more comfortable and prolong the date!
I think an offer to pay half would be appreciated by most men, but most will probably thank you and pay it all. Thanking him is always appropriate if he pays. You could then offer to treat him next time - if you want to see him again. And that might be a lead-in to suggest the next date, so have something in mind.
Absolutely offer. He may or may not accept. There are guys here on CD who refuse to pay for a woman's dinner...for whatever reason.
I do, however, think he should pay.
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