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I no longer put effort in. I have Eharmony because of a sale, and barely use the free ones. Its a total waste of time now that everyone is doing it. Its too hard to get someone's attention. I got tired of putting thought into emails and not getting a response, as well as women thinking they can just get away with "hey".
It needs to go away, but I know it won't. I miss the days of meeting through friends and pretty much being in a relationship by the first date anyways, cause you already had an attraction built beforehand.
It needs to go away, but I know it won't. I miss the days of meeting through friends and pretty much being in a relationship by the first date anyways, cause you already had an attraction built beforehand.
This is a good point. I like to ask the woman on this forum, how often did you initiate contact with another user on a dating site? Was it never, rarely, often?
Thanks!
Pretty often. When I was active, I probably sent at least a couple messages a day. Actually, I initiated contact with a lot of my dates, including my husband.
It needs to go away, but I know it won't. I miss the days of meeting through friends and pretty much being in a relationship by the first date anyways, cause you already had an attraction built beforehand.
How does the existence of dating sites prevent you from meeting through friends, etc.? Plenty of people meet through other means. Why should everyone else miss out on the benefits (to us) of dating sites just because it's not others' cup of tea?
I mean, I don't fancy dive bars, but if it works for other people, cool. I'm not going to wish it goes away just because it isn't my thing. Sour grapes, much.
How does the existence of dating sites prevent you from meeting through friends, etc.? Plenty of people meet through other means. Why should everyone else miss out on the benefits (to us) of dating sites just because it's not others' cup of tea?
I mean, I don't fancy dive bars, but if it works for other people, cool. I'm not going to wish it goes away just because it isn't my thing. Sour grapes, much.
I agree, I always laugh at these types of responses. Doing cold approaches for me never worked, yet judging from some posts here it apparently works for some. Yet I'm not here trying to tell people to stop or that it's bad just because it never worked for me.
How does the existence of dating sites prevent you from meeting through friends, etc.? Plenty of people meet through other means. Why should everyone else miss out on the benefits (to us) of dating sites just because it's not others' cup of tea?
I mean, I don't fancy dive bars, but if it works for other people, cool. I'm not going to wish it goes away just because it isn't my thing. Sour grapes, much.
Quote:
Originally Posted by david0966
I agree, I always laugh at these types of responses. Doing cold approaches for me never worked, yet judging from some posts here it apparently works for some. Yet I'm not here trying to tell people to stop or that it's bad just because it never worked for me.
Yes finally good old fashioned common sense prevails and shows it's self at last
How does the existence of dating sites prevent you from meeting through friends, etc.? Plenty of people meet through other means. Why should everyone else miss out on the benefits (to us) of dating sites just because it's not others' cup of tea?
I mean, I don't fancy dive bars, but if it works for other people, cool. I'm not going to wish it goes away just because it isn't my thing. Sour grapes, much.
I think what she (Mir) means is that because of online dating's presence, people are less inclined to approach in public, meet through friends, etc. If it were completely eliminated, we might go back to the way it was....but I doubt it.
She's looking at it from a woman's perspective of course, in that men are complacent because they can rely on OLD. This is somewhat true for me. I know that since I have my Match account as a back-up, I'm less motivated to randomly approach women at a bar. In fact, I'm less motivated to even go to a bar.
She's mostly just venting it seems. Like, for now OLD hasn't worked in her favor, but the moment it does, she'll be thanking the gods for its creation.
I no longer put effort in. I have Eharmony because of a sale, and barely use the free ones. Its a total waste of time now that everyone is doing it. Its too hard to get someone's attention. I got tired of putting thought into emails and not getting a response, as well as women thinking they can just get away with "hey".
Yup only about 10 - 20 pct of men do any good on it and most are in certain metros. In my area if I filter out women with kids and filter out for my physical attraction / body type preference I eliminate at least 75 pct of my matches due to those 2 things alone.
So I'm basically messaging the same women that a hundred other men are messaging. This is why men do the copy pasta / spam. The logic there is if you copy pasta spam email 500 women statistically at least a couple should respond.
Men like us that cherry pick, read profiles, strategically decide who we write to and write a regular letter cannot compete, it's impossible.
One of the only sites I support is EHarmony I'm totally against any search based site that allows the mass messaging of hundreds of people in one day.
For me to ever take OLD serious the male to female ratio would have to be controlled, and no mass messaging of hundreds of women in one day would be allowed.
The max number of messages per day that can be sent should be around 5 or so, whether you're a paying member or not. This would force men to have to use a totally different strategy and copy pasta spam email wouldn't really work.
On a side note OKCupid is another site being sued now.
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