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I think divorce is too easy. That's why the rate is so high.
I've been divorced three times. All three time were not initiated by me. I'm either very difficult to live with or very bad at picking mates!
That said, I think I'd still be married to my first wife if divorce was so not easily obtained. She changed over the years and developed different interests. Rather than compromising and doing my stuff and I doing hers, we just split up.
Marriage is tough and you need to put in the hard work and effort to maintain it. A lot of people say "if I have to work at it I don't want it". Well, I think the hard work is worth the effort in the long run.
We live in a society now where we want instant gratification and we think we "can have it all". It used to be "when the going gets tough, the tough get going". Well, now we get going alright, going down the road!
I think the other problem is today one's word doesn't have much meaning anymore. Commitment and dedication have given way to what is the latest and greatest.
If divorce wasn't so easy to get I think people would think harder about getting married to begin with. Now a lot of people just get married knowing if it doesn't work out they can bail any time. If divorces were granted only for extreme cases that could be proven (abuse, spouse convicted of a serious crime, cheating, etc) marriage would look differently. The added benefit would be lot's of jobs for private investigators and marriage counselors! Let's get rid of the "no fault divorce". You entered into a legal partnership under contract that should only be dissolved when one party breaks the provisions of the contract.
A lot of cultures have arranged marriages. Most of us would balk at that idea but I tend to think that family elders may know whats better for us than we do, especially when we think we are in love but are really just in lust.
It is not because it is too easy, it is because it is socially acceptable and sometimes incentivized. We are not in the era of "what will the neighbors think" anymore. Besides, when you can take 1/2 the breadwinner assets, get lifetime alimony, and have the State become the family "provider", to some divorce sound like a better deal.
If divorce wasn't so easy to get I think people would think harder about getting married to begin with. Now a lot of people just get married knowing if it doesn't work out they can bail any time. If divorces were granted only for extreme cases that could be proven (abuse, spouse convicted of a serious crime, cheating, etc) marriage would look differently.
Even with the paperwork and so-called commitment of marriage, why is it such a bad thing that a relationship that isn't working or functioning as it should comes to an end? Nobody loves a divorce, and it's not easy, but I don't understand the guys (and it's usually guys) who are constantly complaining about women ending marriages "for no good reason." Who gets to decide if it's a good reason? Why should people who don't like each other very much and who don't want to be married be forced to remain attached to each other?
Even with the paperwork and so-called commitment of marriage, why is it such a bad thing that a relationship that isn't working or functioning as it should comes to an end? Nobody loves a divorce, but I don't understand the guys (and it's usually guys) who are constantly complaining about women ending marriages "for no good reason." Who gets to decide if it's a good reason? Why should people who don't like each other very much be forced to remain attached to each other?
Because it is either a commitment or it's not. If you bail when it gets tough then it is not a commitment. that's my point!
If it isn't working or functioning then fix it. Each party has to work on themselves to improve, to be a better person. Obviously, there are going to be exceptions but overall, most people just aren't willing to put in the hard work. It is easier to just throw in the towel and quit rather than admitting that they could improve themselves. I think ego plays a big part in it. A lot of us are just too full of ourselves to admit we could be wrong and unwilling to compromise.
I think divorce is too easy. That's why the rate is so high.
I've been divorced three times. All three time were not initiated by me. I'm either very difficult to live with or very bad at picking mates!
That said, I think I'd still be married to my first wife if divorce was so not easily obtained. She changed over the years and developed different interests. Rather than compromising and doing my stuff and I doing hers, we just split up.
Marriage is tough and you need to put in the hard work and effort to maintain it. A lot of people say "if I have to work at it I don't want it". Well, I think the hard work is worth the effort in the long run.
We live in a society now where we want instant gratification and we think we "can have it all". It used to be "when the going gets tough, the tough get going". Well, now we get going alright, going down the road!
I think the other problem is today one's word doesn't have much meaning anymore. Commitment and dedication have given way to what is the latest and greatest.
If divorce wasn't so easy to get I think people would think harder about getting married to begin with. Now a lot of people just get married knowing if it doesn't work out they can bail any time. If divorces were granted only for extreme cases that could be proven (abuse, spouse convicted of a serious crime, cheating, etc) marriage would look differently. The added benefit would be lot's of jobs for private investigators and marriage counselors! Let's get rid of the "no fault divorce". You entered into a legal partnership under contract that should only be dissolved when one party breaks the provisions of the contract.
A lot of cultures have arranged marriages. Most of us would balk at that idea but I tend to think that family elders may know whats better for us than we do, especially when we think we are in love but are really just in lust.
Why should any person have to justify their desire to be divorced? If they can't do that, then they should be forced to stay married? How does that benefit anyone? Strange way of thinking, in my view.
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