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I do not. I generally avoided even attempting to start relationships until a couple months ago when I decided that I wanted kids.
From about 18-27, I mostly was interested in short-term flings, going to bars, and hooking up. Then from 27-29, I lost interest in that and kind of just dated whoever was around. It was only about 2 months ago that I decided that I wanted a family and am, therefore, dating again and meeting a lot of women.
I do think that marriages should be 50/50. When I do get married and have children, I plan on making the bulk of the money (which I likely will because I have a high paying job). I also plan on managing my kid's healthcare (I currently manage the healthcare for both of my parents and my brother) since I work in that industry. I also plan on managing the finances since I'm good with money and I just like to do it.
Women cheat quite often too. Just throwing that out there.
Well you can think it's sour grapes if you want.
But, in reality, my views don't align with that of liberal women at all. In fact, the last 2 girls that I was dating were very liberal and I broke things off with them because I didn't like many of their views (though I was very physically attracted to them and we were able to have long conversations).
Here were my issues with each of them (the liberal ones):
1) She was hot and made things easy for me. She approached me at the gym and gave me her number. So I did like that. What I didn't like about her: she was an ardent supporter of divorce and did not have a very good relationship with her family. She also was unsure of whether or not she wanted kids. She did say that if she did have kids, she would only want 1 or 2 tops (whereas, I want 3-5 kids). She did have a job, but not a very good one and it seemed like she had difficulty maintaining commitments to things (more likely to divorce).
2) The second one was not "hot" per se, but I still found her attractive. We had very good conversations and were able to talk for hours and hours without interruption. She's very intelligent. I did like that. But, again, I did not like her views on marriage/divorce and she also was unsure of whether or not she wanted kids.
She was also extremely critical of my views and I honestly got tired of hearing this.
This is not close to all of the liberal women that I've dated throughout my life, just women in the past 6 months or so. I'm from New York originally and went to a liberal college. So I was surrounded by liberal women.
After college, I joined the military and met far more conservative women in the area that I was stationed and, frankly, it was a breath of fresh air.
So, now, I'm sticking to more conservative, religious women and, so far, while they are not perfect, I really like what I see.
Just what I expected. I mean, it wasn't difficult to deduce based on your posts upthread. And 50/50 isn't you financially providing, paying for healthcare and managing the finances unless that's the dynamic agreed upon by both parties. But again, you want a helpmate who remains committed no matter what, even if it's a crappy marriage.
I like how you state you want a conservative religious woman right after admitting to your own lascivious and debaucherous ways. It's very fitting. But you do you.
Just what I expected. I mean, it wasn't difficult to deduce based on your posts upthread. And 50/50 isn't you financially providing, paying for healthcare and managing the finances unless that's the dynamic agreed upon by both parties. But again, you want a helpmate who remains committed no matter what, even if it's a crappy marriage.
I'm not paying for healthcare. They have their own insurance.
By "managing", I literally mean that I go to doctor's appointments with them, keep them on task with their medications, have access to their medical portals, and consult with their doctors.
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I like how you state you want a conservative religious woman right after admitting to your own lascivious and debaucherous ways. It's very fitting. But you do you.
Where did I mention any "lascivious and debaucherous" ways?
I haven't even stepped in a bar in years. Years ago, I did behave in regrettable ways, but this was simply because I didn't know that there was something better out there.
Aren't liberals constantly advocating for not punishing people for their pasts? Or do you all only push for this when it benefits your cause?
Sometimes marriages simply don't work due to the fundamentals of the relationship dynamic, which differs for each couple. Just because men don't initiate divorce in most cases doesn't mean the marriage was a healthy or good one, or that they share little or no responsibility for why it dissolved.
I agree with this. I've never seen or heard of one case of separation nor divorce in which both contributed to its end. "Fault" is sometimes is too strong of a word to describe the situation but certainly both contributed. Cases such as divorces after the loss of a child come to mind....
However, I haven't actually seen the legal aspect of divorce that I felt ended fairly. I will admit that I've known only a handful of couples that went through divorce (small sample). But my observations scares the crap out of me because in all those cases the ex-husband financially was left devastated. One such couple (I am friends with the wife) eventually became a divorce/family lawyer specialized in representing men.
I think the causes of the actually ending of the relationship is a different discussion from the legal proceedings of divorce.
Well, what reasoning should people use? "I'm not getting what I want, so this is perfect I'm going to stick this out."?
People will validate themselves however they feel they should. Its not my place to tell them if they are right or wrong.
there is an inherent bias in what people preach when they speak of marriage going on on both sides of the argument here, but neither is actually attempting to look at it from another's perspective. Everyone is just trying to protect what they believe is important as it applies to them.
I can't see any real benefit to making divorce more difficult. While the best examples of how that can ruin someone's life involve women being stuck in an abusive or woefully unhappy marriage, plenty of men find their marriage to be a complete bag of ****. No thanks (to bad marriages--the institution can work great).
I'm not paying for healthcare. They have their own insurance.
By "managing", I literally mean that I go to doctor's appointments with them, keep them on task with their medications, have access to their medical portals, and consult with their doctors.
Where did I mention any "lascivious and debaucherous" ways?
I haven't even stepped in a bar in years. Years ago, I did behave in regrettable ways, but this was simply because I didn't know that there was something better out there.
Aren't liberals constantly advocating for not punishing people for their pasts? Or do you all only push for this when it benefits your cause?
That's at least the second time you've attempted to turn a thread having to do with divorce into a conservative/liberal thing. Good grief. Must everything be politicized?
However, if you insist: red states have higher rates of divorce (and other, far more serious social problems). That fact is well documented.
That's at least the second time you've attempted to turn a thread having to do with divorce into a conservative/liberal thing. Good grief. Must everything be politicized?
I'm not trying to politicize anything. I was making a statement towards that poster, who is known for being extremely liberal in her views.
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However, if you insist: red states have higher rates of divorce (and other, far more serious social problems). That fact is well documented.
I'm not paying for healthcare. They have their own insurance.
By "managing", I literally mean that I go to doctor's appointments with them, keep them on task with their medications, have access to their medical portals, and consult with their doctors.
I quoted your response about how you plan to provide for the family/children. You mentioned health insurance, which I made reference to.
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Where did I mention any "lascivious and debaucherous" ways?
You made it a point to mention you engaged in flings for quite some time and are now just showing interest in something serious because you want to procreate.
Based on this conservative whatever you align with when it suits you, this sort of behavior is not very 1950s, but you know that. Your 1950s ideals aren't meant for you. Just the women you date. But not really, 'cause fornication is a no-no for both parties. I mean, if you're all down with conservative values of the 1950s, the golden years of society, then abstain away. Not only should women stay committed helpmates to their maybe crappy husbands, because "vows" and "principles," but they should remain chaste, too. No frisky business for wholesome guys and gals.
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I haven't even stepped in a bar in years. Years ago, I did behave in regrettable ways, but this was simply because I didn't know that there was something better out there.
But how does that jive with being a 1950s man stuck in today's modern world? I guess we all turn a new leaf when it best suits us.
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Aren't liberals constantly advocating for not punishing people for their pasts?
I have no "moral" issue with consensual and ethical behaviors/encounters or what have you. However, I will call out double standards, contradictions, and inconsistencies in one's "logic" when they attempt to paint broad brushes for the rest of us, or make sweeping pronouncements. You make value judgments about today's women and society, claim to know all the relationship things, and yet can't uphold the standard of the era/culture you idolize. Yes, that totally follows.
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Or do you all only push for this when it benefits your cause?
If by my "cause" you mean adhering to the principles you preach and use as the basis of your "argument." Yes, I would rather people avoid making erroneous statements and logical fallacies. That's not such a bad thing.
You made it a point to mention you engaged in flings for quite some time and are now just showing interest in something serious because you want to procreate.
Based on this conservative whatever you align with when it suits you, this sort of behavior is not very 1950s, but you know that. Your 1950s ideals aren't meant for you. Just the women you date. But not really, 'cause fornication is a no-no for both parties. I mean, if you're all down with conservative values of the 1950s, the golden years of society, then abstain away. Not only should women stay committed helpmates to their maybe crappy husbands, because "vows" and "principles," but they should remain chaste, too. No frisky business for wholesome guys and gals.
Again, had their been better options, I wouldn't have engaged in flings. I grew up in the very liberal New York City and that's just how people behave in that area for the most part.
I actually am abstaining and have for some time, thank you very much. I have not engaged in casual sex in years and do not plan on restarting that.
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But how does that jive with being a 1950s man stuck in today's modern world? I guess we all turn a new leaf when it best suits us.
Speak for yourself.
The 1950s were a far better time and the culture was better. I was young and formidable and brainwashed by our current society in the past to think that what I was doing was the best thing. It wasn't.
I was wrong in the past and I admit that.
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I have no "moral" issue with consensual and ethical behaviors/encounters or what have you. However, I will call out double standards, contradictions, and inconsistencies in one's "logic" when they attempt to paint broad brushes for the rest of us, or make sweeping pronouncements. You make value judgments about today's women and society, claim to know all the relationship things, and yet can't uphold the standard of the era/culture you idolize. Yes, that totally follows.
Well, there are moral issues with these things even if you don't subscribe to them.
To put it a bit more frankly, there are certain types of people that shouldn't be engaging in certain behaviors. I will do the best I can to see that they do not engage in such behavior.
I think we both know what I'm saying here.
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