A guy who loves bragging about his wealth but stingy af
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So he makes good money and he is into investments, and he is training himself to be very frugal. Maybe he wants to 'retire early'.
I could see where I met that description when I was in my 20s and 30s, and I retired at 42.
That is not a bad thing.
In general, no, it's not a bad thing at all to be frugal, save more than you spend, etc. That's a good, healthy relationship with money. If he's FIRE, that could be a deal breaker for a lot of people. Not everyone likes that lifestyle choice. I for one am all about the FI but not the RE end of things.
I actually came across this forum while I was reading up on this topic. Anyway, let me start and be warn that this might be long, as I'm not very good at simplifying details.
Recently have been going out with this guy who loves bragging about his money. I actually went out for a date with him once early last year, but he came on a bit too strong and it freaked me out. I felt like whenever I'm talking and he's listening, he's giving me this look that made me uncomfortable. Not sexual but just sort of an intense look maybe? I ignored his message after that because back then I didnt' have the balls to tell someone I'm not interested. He got a bit bitter by sending a link on rejection article/video. Understandable but most guys I have met before this would just move on, as would i.
So guys, thoughts?
i stopped reading here. RIDICULOUS. What a drama queen. I bet he has a ton of selfies and quotes on his social media.
He said he wants a relationship with shared financial responsibilities. If you make 10 times less than he does, that isn't going to work. He should date people closer to his financial level, especially since money seems to be a priority for him.
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lou
He said he wants a relationship with shared financial responsibilities. If you make 10 times less than he does, that isn't going to work. He should date people closer to his financial level, especially since money seems to be a priority for him.
For a guy that is stingy...ita.....BUT not for everybody that has money. My fiance makes lots more than me & it works with us....super well. He's not stingy....or controlling tho.
Location: As of 2022….back to SoCal. OC this time!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lou
It's his prerogative to want more of an equal financial partner.
I didn't say it wasn't tho ...he can be stingy all he wants. BUT.. for some men like my fiance.......he wouldn't be able to find somebody that makes equal to him cause not many women make what he makes IMO....tho I'm lucky he doesn't put that much importance on money or need to have it even.
edit: it seems kinda superficial IMO....dating somebody based on what they make AND really stingy.
Last edited by TashaPosh; 07-06-2020 at 04:08 PM..
The people I know who are truly well off don't behave like this guy, constantly making a "thing" out of their money and possessions. But anyway, the money isn't the issue.
His being frugal would not bother me so much as the fact that he's inconsiderate, which is nor a quirk. It's downright rude to say these kinds of things:
... regardless of how much money you have.
Maybe he thinks he's fending off the fabled gold-diggers by behaving this way. Whatever ... there's a difference in giving someone the benefit of the doubt and willingly walking past flaming red flags.
Just because you have self-worth issues doesn't mean you need to give every a-hole a chance. Read some more about emotional boundaries and know what really is and should be acceptable to you. Someone who is this disrespectful and careless on an early date is not going to morph into Prince Charming 10 or 20 years down the road.
Fending off gold diggers, he'd hide his wealth. I dating a wealthy guy like this in college. He pretended to be poor until he knew I loved him poor. His cheap ways were annoying once I knew. Just WAY too frugal. I get frugal is how one stays wealthy, but things can be taken too far.
Back when a rewind button for cassette in car was an upgrade for his beater, I was like for God's sake, how much did you save on this???????? ugh.
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...he can be stingy all he wants. BUT.. for some men like my fiance.......he wouldn't be able to find somebody that makes equal to him cause not many women make what he makes IMO....tho I'm lucky he doesn't put that much importance on money or need to have it even. 
