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1) You never initiated contact first
2) She made it clear she was into you
3) you failed to rise to the occasion
4) you didnt text her afterwards.
If i was her, everything about your behavior rejected me. You say that you've waited a long time to have a naked girl lie next to you, yet you provided very little foreplay or aftercare. Most guys dont understand that sex extends way beyond actual intercourse. If you like her, apologize for making her do all the work, ask her out again, and dont pressure yourself (or her) to perform. Let things flow naturally.
Regarding your comment on low self esteem, even the most confident girl will feel vulnerable once she is naked beside you. Its your job to make her feel beautiful in that moment. The more confident she feels the better the reward.
1) You never initiated contact first
2) She made it clear she was into you
3) you failed to rise to the occasion
4) you didnt text her afterwards.
If i was her, everything about your behavior rejected me. You say that you've waited a long time to have a naked girl lie next to you, yet you provided very little foreplay or aftercare. Most guys dont understand that sex extends way beyond actual intercourse. If you like her, apologize for making her do all the work, ask her out again, and dont pressure yourself (or her) to perform. Let things flow naturally.
Regarding your comment on low self esteem, even the most confident girl will feel vulnerable once she is naked beside you. Its your job to make her feel beautiful in that moment. The more confident she feels the better the reward.
Sex, for some of us, isn't just a random gratification thing. Saying you have been dating and texting doesn't say much about your relationship with each other.
You say "...of course, I choked..." as if you knew that would happen, or are you simply commenting on the probability of Murphy's Law applying to your failed attempt? Is that a medical problem? Did you know you were moving too fast or is it otherwise a head (emotional) problem?
What was your reaction to this failure when you saw that was what was definitely happening? Would there be any reason for her to feel like you thought your choking was her fault? If so, that would explain why she is not texting.
You should call her and ask her out. You either break the ice between you, or confirm that she is done with you - for whatever reason.
The bolded portion of the quote is a good point. If you know you have an issue, whether physical or mentally, you need to address that before you get to that point again with someone new.
I've been dating this girl who was recently divorced and I think on the rebound and not ready to date. Anyways, since dating she texted me constantly and I never initiated texts. Last time we were together we were going to have sex and of course I choked and couldn't stay hard. After that she never texted me again, but I also never texted her (last Friday). I thought it was weird she didn't text me and she likely got scared off or something and lost interest since she was always texting me before. What do you think is the most likely reason she didn't text me again? I'm just trying to understand for myself, not necessarily to get back with her.
1. She thought I wasn't attracted to her from not staying hard and failing in bed?
2. Almost having sex scared her off?
3. Was not happy with me that I couldn't perform?
4. Other?
Do people not think anymore? All of the Bolded, plus, you state, she may have esteem issues?
You say she may have Low esteem issues? Better look in the mirror for the follow-up on that one.
But, to assist you into your own epiphany:
1: How can you be Dating her, if, she is recently divorced, and you perceive her to be on rebound, and not ready to date?
2: She got naked, was telling you she accepted the fact/situation you were going to give her back that feeling that she wasn't worthy of physical show of love/intimacy. (This always helps with low esteem issues)
3: Definitely embarrassed if you didn't perform, probably more for you tho.
4: Other? You didn't CALL her later/next day to let her know anything!! (She didn't text me, so I don't have to text her!!) Really? you want a relationship, but you aren't willing to commit a verbal connection after you let her down?! No, you get on a public forum and ask others why a third party isn't texting you? What grade in Jr. High are ya'll in?
Got to say, loved the movie "ClueLess" tho!.
The other part of the equation is: You've got 3 or 4 posts going about this, HOPEFULLY, she's not someone you met through work, or else, you'll have to interact with her and that is AWKWARD! But, since you have put all the below referenced Posts out there, why continue asking basically the same question? Looking for what? Absolution? Forgiveness? or, just an excuse to not feel like you've used someone and put them in a worse position than they were before you met them?
"I was wondering how women feel after a relationship ends or the guy leaves the relationship a few dates or weeks after having sex for the first time. This is assuming you’ve been out 3-5 times. Is it a bad thing for a guy to do and does it make the woman feel used?
I started dating a girl who ended a 3 year marriage 6 months ago. We are both in our 30's. Her ex cheated on her 3 days after their marriage!! And the following years were marriage counseling to make it through. It took its toll on her. She is coming on really strong, always texting me, and things are getting sexual. Even though she appears to be into me, she always seems in a bad mood or kind of sad when I am with her in person. Likely hangover from the divorce, as it took a lot out of her. "
"My concern is that the last girl I dated was just like her and recently divorced. She seemed very into me and came on very strong, and then she just disappeared for no reason. I was likely a rebound or she just wasn't ready to date. I have reason to be cautious. I told her upfront that I don't want to put pressure on things and have no expectations. I also still don't feel strongly for her one way or the other, so I'm not at risk of getting hurt yet. I guess as long as the sex and companionship is good for both of us, I shouldn't worry? Are there red flags here? What are your thoughts?"
"Etiquette when meeting someone THROUGH work? (women, single, romantic, casual)"
If i was her, everything about your behavior rejected me. You say that you've waited a long time to have a naked girl lie next to you, yet you provided very little foreplay or aftercare. Most guys dont understand that sex extends way beyond actual intercourse. If you like her, apologize for making her do all the work, ask her out again, and dont pressure yourself (or her) to perform. Let things flow naturally.
That isn't true that I didn't provide foreplay or aftercare. People love to add drama on here. I never got into those details. How would you know if I did or did not, so why are you adding in information to my story that isn't true?
That isn't true that I didn't provide foreplay or aftercare. People love to add drama on here. I never got into those details. How would you know if I did or did not, so why are you adding in information to my story that isn't true?
I told my current bf that foreplay starts from the moment he leaves my house...What i meant is foreplay and aftercare beyond that of sex.....As in initiating contact, randomly messaging her a sweet message. Or texting her afterwards. Calling her just because you are thinking about her. Trust me, i don't care for drama, just giving you a female perspective.
I've been dating this girl who was recently divorced and I think on the rebound and not ready to date. Anyways, since dating she texted me constantly and I never initiated texts. Last time we were together we were going to have sex and of course I choked and couldn't stay hard. After that she never texted me again, but I also never texted her (last Friday). I thought it was weird she didn't text me and she likely got scared off or something and lost interest since she was always texting me before. What do you think is the most likely reason she didn't text me again? I'm just trying to understand for myself, not necessarily to get back with her.
1. She thought I wasn't attracted to her from not staying hard and failing in bed?
2. Almost having sex scared her off?
3. Was not happy with me that I couldn't perform?
4. Other?
3 no other answer makes sense based upon the chronology you provided. She probably was tired of wasting her tim initiating everything as well. The defect was probably her last straw.
I've been dating this girl who was recently divorced and I think on the rebound and not ready to date. Anyways, since dating she texted me constantly and I never initiated texts. Last time we were together we were going to have sex and of course I choked and couldn't stay hard. After that she never texted me again, but I also never texted her (last Friday). I thought it was weird she didn't text me and she likely got scared off or something and lost interest since she was always texting me before. What do you think is the most likely reason she didn't text me again? I'm just trying to understand for myself, not necessarily to get back with her.
1. She thought I wasn't attracted to her from not staying hard and failing in bed?
2. Almost having sex scared her off?
3. Was not happy with me that I couldn't perform?
4. Other?
OK...you couldn't stay hard. What happened then? Did you just leave her hanging?
I don't want to get too explicit...but there ARE other things the two of you could do. IF the encounter was over, because you couldn't perform, she might've thought you were a selfish lover.
I'm not saying or implying that's the case, just pointing out it MIGHT be.
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