Men who bring their dog on the date -- cute or a turn-off? (woman, love)
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I would find that very annoying and rude at the same time! Don't these people with their dog know that when you're going on a date...it's YOU and the DATE...no pets allowed! The fact that all these dates were more interested in their dog then the date...lets me know that this is probably why they're single.To take your pet with you on a date WITHOUT asking the next person if it's ok is rude and so inappropriate.A date is a date between 2 people and NOT 2 people and a pet inbetween.
Now the dog park one would have been the best date IF the jerk would have stayed in 1 place so you could have found him BUT he was more involved with having fun with his dog instead of actually realizing that 'hey' he was on a date with another person...where is the common courtesy here?
For me...taking your dog on a date is a turnoff..IF it wasn't discussed before the meeting.I say then if you can't go on a date without bringing your dog....then don't date because it is really rude to expect everyone to NOT have a problem with the 3 of you on a date.
Last edited by codergirl; 11-01-2018 at 11:42 AM..
We take our dog to a LOT of places with us, but it is unfair to do this on a first meet/date.
The first guy should not have insisted on dinner since it was so chilly (and frankly, I'm surprised anyplace had unheated outdoor seating available in 50-degree weather). He should also have brought his dog's dinner along, but he probably wanted an excuse to leave if things didn't go well.
The second guy, I have no problem with his bringing his dog along, but it sounds like he wasn't a good conversationalist. It would be tough to date with a puppy.
The third guy was the worst, and I hope you at least brought your dog along for company.
Right! The puppy thing is understandable. I think it was annoying how he approached it -- "Let's meet here and I'll bring my puppy" rather than, "Hey I have a puppy, would you mind if we met at this dog-friendly place, she needs socialization after work."
And the first guy was texting me nonstop after that so he's definitely still interested/oblivious to what happened. In fairness though I just went along with it. I could have said "It's a bit cold to eat outside, I might just go home."
With the third guy, I did not bring my dog... she's older so the dog park isn't really as big of a thrill anymore, she kind of just sits in the corner until it's time to go home. Lol
I find it odd that you're encountering this issue so many times. If it ever happens again, that a guy says, "is it ok to bring my dog", or simply announces that he'll be bringing his dog on the date, you can counter with, "If you don't mind, I'd rather not have the distraction there. I like to focus on my date" or "I like dates to just be the two of us." If he balks, you know he's not for you. You dodged a bullet.
Well I think part of it is, the city I live in is very dog friendly. As in, there are dog parks everywhere and several "dog bars" where your dog is allowed inside and they even have dog menus. I'm dating online/on dating apps so a fair number of these locals have dogs.
I thought about asking the guy with a puppy to leave his dog home. It felt rude no matter how I rehearsed it though. But maybe I need to start just doing that. If it offends him, it won't work out anyway.
Well I think part of it is, the city I live in is very dog friendly. As in, there are dog parks everywhere and several "dog bars" where your dog is allowed inside and they even have dog menus. I'm dating online/on dating apps so a fair number of these locals have dogs.
I thought about asking the guy with a puppy to leave his dog home. It felt rude no matter how I rehearsed it though. But maybe I need to start just doing that. If it offends him, it won't work out anyway.
Right. And to answer your thread title question: it's cute if they bring a dog, but stops being cute, if the dog becomes the center of his conversation and attention. It turns into a date between him and the dog, at that point.
I would find that very annoying and rude at the same time! Don't these people with their dog know that when you're going on a date...it's YOU and the DATE...no pets allowed! The fact that all these dates were more interested in their dog then the date...lets me know that this is probably why they're single..
This is so well said! OP---this! IN a nutshell.
Interesting town you live in, though. I guess the town's pro-dog environment has enabled these guys to be a little over-involved with their dogs, to the point of being almost oblivious to their human company. They need to decide whether they want to date women, or dogs. You can't do both in the same date, unless you're able to let the dog fade into the background.
Maybe they think, that being affectionate with the dog will impress women?? Like, "if he's good with dogs, he'll probably be good with kids"? But what they fail to grasp, is that women want to date guys who are good with women, first. HELLO!
I've had this happen with three separate guys recently. I don't mind having the dog there itself but each date has required us to alter the plans in order to have the dog there.
Specifically --
On the first date, we went hiking and he brought his dog. After the hike we decided to get dinner. Since the dog was there we had to sit at an outside table which was FREEZING. Like 50 degrees that day. And we had to end the date right after the dinner so he could take his dog home and feed her.
The second date was a different guy. First time ever meeting. We settled for a beer after work. He suggested a place that has a "dog friendly patio" so he could bring his puppy. That wasn't a problem because the patio was heated and covered. And I understood that he got off work and didn't want to leave his puppy for another two hours after she'd already been home alone all day. The annoying thing was, it felt like we spent the majority of the date talking about his puppy, sort of making comments about what the dog was doing (nothing other than sniffing around, etc).
The third instance was another first date at a dog park. This guy and I were texting a bit prior, and I kind of knew he was a "dog dad" because he'd send me updates about his dog pretty frequently and a lot of photos. So anyway we were supposed to get coffees and walk over to the dog park together. I get there at the assigned time and the guy has already arrived and he's inside the park with his dog. I try to find him but I can't. It's a huge park. Meanwhile, instead of just staying in one place so I can find him, he's moving around and sending me updates and photos of his dog "Look at her swimming, she's having so much fun!" Completely oblivious to the fact that I'm frustratingly trying to find him. I was trying hard to hide my annoyance when we finally met after 45 minutes.
Ok and so you know, l am dog person myself, I have a dog and the dog itself isn't the problem. It's the whole "dog dad" thing that I'm realizing is kind of annoying. Obsessing over their dog and altering plans in order to accommodate the dog. I feel like on a first/second date (which all of these were) it just makes more sense to focus on the person your with. Anyone else experience this?
Now, when I see men in their dating profiles who make comments like "I have the cutest little puppy" and they have multiple pictures with their dog, I am a little leery.
I don't know why any of these guys need to date (unless they are just trying to get laid). They already have all the SO they need.
I'm glad I have a cat. As long as her litter box is clean and she's fed, she's good to go as far as being alone when I leave the house to go somewhere.
Date dogless people. I like dogs, but I do not want them to take preference over me, especailly on a date.
Yes.
I met my girlfriend online. But I purposely avoiding women who had pics of their dog or cat in 1 of their profile pics.
I also work with someone who lives at home with her parents, and for Christmas, she paid for professional pics of her and her dog. Fine if that makes them happy, but I feel sorry for the next guy she dates.
I've had this happen with three separate guys recently. I don't mind having the dog there itself but each date has required us to alter the plans in order to have the dog there.
Specifically --
On the first date, we went hiking and he brought his dog. After the hike we decided to get dinner. Since the dog was there we had to sit at an outside table which was FREEZING. Like 50 degrees that day. And we had to end the date right after the dinner so he could take his dog home and feed her.
The second date was a different guy. First time ever meeting. We settled for a beer after work. He suggested a place that has a "dog friendly patio" so he could bring his puppy. That wasn't a problem because the patio was heated and covered. And I understood that he got off work and didn't want to leave his puppy for another two hours after she'd already been home alone all day. The annoying thing was, it felt like we spent the majority of the date talking about his puppy, sort of making comments about what the dog was doing (nothing other than sniffing around, etc).
The third instance was another first date at a dog park. This guy and I were texting a bit prior, and I kind of knew he was a "dog dad" because he'd send me updates about his dog pretty frequently and a lot of photos. So anyway we were supposed to get coffees and walk over to the dog park together. I get there at the assigned time and the guy has already arrived and he's inside the park with his dog. I try to find him but I can't. It's a huge park. Meanwhile, instead of just staying in one place so I can find him, he's moving around and sending me updates and photos of his dog "Look at her swimming, she's having so much fun!" Completely oblivious to the fact that I'm frustratingly trying to find him. I was trying hard to hide my annoyance when we finally met after 45 minutes.
Ok and so you know, l am dog person myself, I have a dog and the dog itself isn't the problem. It's the whole "dog dad" thing that I'm realizing is kind of annoying. Obsessing over their dog and altering plans in order to accommodate the dog. I feel like on a first/second date (which all of these were) it just makes more sense to focus on the person your with. Anyone else experience this?
Now, when I see men in their dating profiles who make comments like "I have the cutest little puppy" and they have multiple pictures with their dog, I am a little leery.
Maybe one of his tests for compatibility is your ability to handle hikes and interact with a dog. From this perspective he may have been able to judge if a second date was worth it.
Generally speeking people into hikes and the outdoors are also dog lovers.
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