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Let me introduce you to two handy friends: Bob and Weave. When they ask you something about yourself, that you don't want to answer - bob and weave. And start questioning them. Examples:
GF's parents: So ironpony, tell us about your career goals.
You: I have career goals, just like anyone else I suppose. What sort of career goals did you have when you were my age?
GF's parents: What kind of relationships did you have before you met our daughter?
You: Well, that's something I consider personal. Would you like to share your own relationship histories with me?
The best defense is offense. I know several people who are masters of this sort of conversation manipulation. The key, it seems to me, is to never allow the person to finish their answer before interjecting with another question. Before you know it, you've completely derailed the conversation and the person is trying to answer your questions accurately without having a chance to formulate and ask questions of you themselves.
Truth be told, I've seen and experienced this often enough to recognize when it's happening. The people who develop this approach usually have something to hide, so they pepper people with incessant personal and probing questions. Effectively, you never get a chance to question theirs. I personally don't like this type of conversation, but this is the best thing I could think of to address your concerns.
Then OP does not have the level of capability in navigating social situations to pull off any type of slick avoidance technique.
When this happens to me. I make a joke, change the subject and focus on THEM.
ROLEPLAY:
Parents: so, ironpony, what do you want to do with your life?
You: oh...make several million dollars and retire to the Riviera. Of course, I've never been there but people say it's nice. Have you ever been there? I love hearing stories about places people have been. I bet you have some great stories. Where is your favorite vacation destination?
Or
Parents: tell us about your past.
You: well I'd love to do that but I believe that the present and future are what life is about. Everyone has good and bad memories. I bet you've had some amazing adventures in your life.....
Okay thanks. It's just I also quit my job recently, and feel like so inadequate compared to her family. I mean they got prestigious government jobs that have big houses compared to what I have. Not just her but her parents and uncle as well so far.
And I feel inadequate telling them I haven't a job, and the ones I had before, sucked and all.
Okay thanks. It's just I also quit my job recently, and feel like so inadequate compared to her family. I mean they got prestigious government jobs that have big houses compared to what I have. Not just her but her parents and uncle as well so far.
And I feel inadequate telling them I haven't a job, and the ones I had before, sucked and all.
I think you should just be honest with them and tell them all that stuff.
Oh really, cause we feel like aside from me having some job/career issues in my life, that the relationship is going pretty good so far. I just feel the relationship is a separate thing, and not to be related to other personal issues.
Oh really, cause we feel like aside from me having some job/career issues in my life, that the relationship is going pretty good so far. I just feel the relationship is a separate thing, and not to be related to other personal issues.
"We" who thinks that? You and your doctor?
Because relationship cannot be separate from your other issues. It all is tied together and it all affects the other things.
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