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F25, M26,
Met the guy two weeks ago online. Before we met, he would send me good morning, good night, texts me during lunch time, call me in the evening . First date was dinner(expensive steak place). Second date was movie and he bought me 2 dozen roses. After 2nd date he said he loves me, and wanted me to be his gf. I was in shock but i said yes. He still does all the texting and calling. But I have a bad feeling about him and feel like he may not be very trustworthy. The reasons are:
1. He is very good at talking, he talk about sweet things and future too much. He says "I miss you so much' everytime he calls me, but after the 2nd date he never set up a plan to see me. Two weekends have passed and I did not see him because he was working(I am not sure it is true). The only time he came to see me was he happened to be around my house. He got off work at 3pm on weekdays and he never came to see me. He would go to dinner with his friends. we are like 30min drive. He has a car, i don't.
he will always say oh baby, we might go travel to place A,B,C... oh, I will take you to restaurant A,B,C....But he never really makes any concrete plans. Every time we departs, he says "until next time, my dear, i will miss you".
2. Although he calls me everyday, he always calls me when he is driving and he never do video chats, I feel like i am just his entertainment.
3. He sent me a text of a love poem, I asked whether he wrote it, he said he just wrote it thinking of me. He was not good with words, but he was good with love words because he loves me. I then googled it, and found that he copied and pasted it from a website. Which makes me doubt about his personality. What other lies he told me?
4. he lives with his parents now and he said he lived alone before, now he is just trying to save money. But his parents are very traditional, so i cannot stay overnight. He wanted to buy me a foldable bed, so he can come over on friday and watch tv with me in my apartment. He said he wanted to spend more time with me.
5. I never met any of his friends or relatives. He said he had only one relationship before and the girl cheated on him. He's been single for three years now because he was busy.
6. He said yesterday that he went to the mall and bought me a "suuuper expensive' christmas gift. He said we would go travel in january so we can have more memories together.
7. we haven't had sex yet.
I don't know what to think of this, he comes on too strong and although he says he misses me , he doesn't make much effort to really see me. With him lying about the poem, Do you guys think he is trustworthy? What's his deal? Any input is much appreciated! Thanks
F25, M26,
Met the guy two weeks ago online. Before we met, he would send me good morning, good night, texts me during lunch time, call me in the evening . First date was dinner(expensive steak place). Second date was movie and he bought me 2 dozen roses. After 2nd date he said he loves me, and wanted me to be his gf. I was in shock but i said yes. He still does all the texting and calling. But I have a bad feeling about him and feel like he may not be very trustworthy. The reasons are:
1. He is very good at talking, he talk about sweet things and future too much. He says "I miss you so much' everytime he calls me, but after the 2nd date he never set up a plan to see me. Two weekends have passed and I did not see him because he was working(I am not sure it is true). The only time he came to see me was he happened to be around my house. He got off work at 3pm on weekdays and he never came to see me. He would go to dinner with his friends. we are like 30min drive. He has a car, i don't.
he will always say oh baby, we might go travel to place A,B,C... oh, I will take you to restaurant A,B,C....But he never really makes any concrete plans. Every time we departs, he says "until next time, my dear, i will miss you".
2. Although he calls me everyday, he always calls me when he is driving and he never do video chats, I feel like i am just his entertainment.
3. He sent me a text of a love poem, I asked whether he wrote it, he said he just wrote it thinking of me. He was not good with words, but he was good with love words because he loves me. I then googled it, and found that he copied and pasted it from a website. Which makes me doubt about his personality. What other lies he told me?
4. he lives with his parents now and he said he lived alone before, now he is just trying to save money. But his parents are very traditional, so i cannot stay overnight. He wanted to buy me a foldable bed, so he can come over on friday and watch tv with me in my apartment. He said he wanted to spend more time with me.
5. I never met any of his friends or relatives. He said he had only one relationship before and the girl cheated on him. He's been single for three years now because he was busy.
6. He said yesterday that he went to the mall and bought me a "suuuper expensive' christmas gift. He said we would go travel in january so we can have more memories together.
7. we haven't had sex yet.
I don't know what to think of this, he comes on too strong and although he says he misses me , he doesn't make much effort to really see me. With him lying about the poem, Do you guys think he is trustworthy? What's his deal? Any input is much appreciated! Thanks
Quote:
Originally Posted by strugglewithweight
After 2nd date he said he loves me, and wanted me to be his gf. I was in shock but i said yes.
We are coming up on date 3. This is the date - whenever it happens - where you will travel and make memories together.
This is where he probably plans to hit it, and possibly even quit it. Do you think he will still be interested in you if you feign an excuse as to why you cant travel?
On dates that involve travel, I would just be guessing, but I think most guys would be looking for sex at that point.
We are coming up on date 3. This is the date - whenever it happens - where you will travel and make memories together.
This is where he probably plans to hit it, and possibly even quit it. Do you think he will still be interested in you if you feign an excuse as to why you cant travel?
On dates that involve travel, I would just be guessing, but I think most guys would be looking for sex at that point.
He might stay with you after he hits it, if he thinks its freakin awesome and he cant get enough of it. Also, if he loves you and has the maturity level to assert his role positively.
There are things like 'the Three Date Rule', and 'Hitting it and Quitting it' where he will reveal he is an immature player, and move on after he's been there and done that.
Life's a gamble. Spin the wheel. Roll the dice. The only place you can fail is not practicing safe sex, and not being mature enough to be sure about what you want now.
I think you need more casual dates where you can get to know one another. Don’t invite him to your home. Don’t meet the parents yet. Ask him to meet you for a date someplace and pay for all of it. Go to a museum or craft fair where you can walk around and talk. Don’t travel anywhere with him until you’re found at least one person you are both acquainted with.
Reel it in. Slow it down. Let things develop or fall apart in their due course. Remain open but skeptical.
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