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I'm a guy and I can't imagine I would ever have a child without having a paternity test done. I wouldn't be able to sleep properly at night wondering if I was burning my money raising another man's child.
How do other men do it? Don't they ever question themselves?
In other words, how do men trust their loving partner? There’s got to be trust in relationship. Smart men, typically, don’t get women they don’t trust pregnant.
I’ll start questioning my better half if my baby doesn’t come out with a flat nose, and has red hair, Lol.
I would trust and not worry about it, unless there was some indication that she could have cheated (prior cheating, relationship problems or time apart around the time of conception, etc.) and may have had some motivation to do so. I would also be a little concerned if the pregnancy was unplanned, and/or you weren't having frequent sex at the time.
I'm a guy and I can't imagine I would ever have a child without having a paternity test done. I wouldn't be able to sleep properly at night wondering if I was burning my money raising another man's child.
How do other men do it? Don't they ever question themselves?
I seriously suggest that you be very careful where your semen ends up. If you never have an unplanned child, you never have to worry about it.
It's not a great idea to have children with a casual partner, so just don't have any children. Problem solved.
I'm a guy and I can't imagine I would ever have a child without having a paternity test done. I wouldn't be able to sleep properly at night wondering if I was burning my money raising another man's child.
How do other men do it? Don't they ever question themselves?
I think your blowing things way out of proportion. It became pretty evident for me after my daughter was born she was mine not that I had reason to doubt it at the time. While her overall physical build is her moms her eyes and nose are not and some aspects of her personality are definitely mine. You'll pretty much know quick enough.
90% of the women out there would never do such a thing in a committed relationship. Unfortunately sometimes things don't go according to plan and accidents happen.
As for another persons kid I raised another mans daughter and I can say to this day that my stepdaughter loves me as her father. I was there in all things that mattered when she was growing up. She does have a relationship with her bio father and I encourage it, he was not a bad man. She has struck a balance as she sees fit. Our relationship is living proof that biology plays second fiddle when it comes to kids and fathers.
Men should not be so judgmental when it comes to a child. Being a FATHER is much more necessary than being the sperm donor. Any swinging dick can make a child, not just anyone can be a father.
What men need to be concerned about is the MOTHER of said child, goals in life and his understanding of what it means to be a father. I've had reason in my time to run like a scalded dog hard as it was knowing the fate of the child.
How do other men do it? Don't they ever question themselves?
I'm not a man, but I think in general, it's rare for people to question themselves very much. When you peek too far behind the curtain, what is always revealed is how little control one really has over circumstance...there is always a possible "gotcha!" lurking, no matter how careful a person may be in planning and intent.
Per your actual topic query, I recently watched "Stories We Tell", an autobiographical documentary by Sarah Polley about discovering that the man who raised her was not her biological father, and also meeting and beginning a relationship with her bio father. It's really interesting how little biology has to do with being a father...it's the emotional investment that makes one a father, not the sperm (legal definition notwithstanding), and that is entirely up to the man to choose to make that investment or not.
So I would hazard a guess that even men who suspect that a child is not their bio child yet do not push for a paternity test, and raise the child as their own, that these men are acknowledging the emotional connection they feel for their child and so paternity is much less of a personal issue that an outsider might think.
If you're worried about it, you married the wrong person. If you feel like it would be stupid to trust anybody that much, then why would you put yourself in a situation in which you could impregnate somebody?
Does a man have to pay child support if the DNA test says it's not his?
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