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I have been in a LDR for the past year and a half. Prior to him moving, we lived together for a year. But due to immigration issues we are currently apart. The initial LDR was extremely difficult, but we managed. I was able to visit him many times. I live in the US and he is in Canada. He has recently left for an extended trip, and what I mean by extended is about 4 or 5 months overseas. When he was in Canada, our time difference was only an hour so we spoke on the phone constantly. Some will say this is not healthy but that's how it was. We'd on average talk between 5 to 8 times a day. Sometimes for an hour and sometimes for a couple of minutes. This made being apart a lot easier because though we were not physically together, it felt like we were since we knew everything that was going on with each other every day. So now that he is overseas, there is a significant time difference and we now speak once, maybe twice a day. I am feeling extremely disconnected from him and don't know to deal with this. My normal routine has been disrupted and I am starting to let not so good thoughts come in to my mind. Many will say that I am being silly, since this wider distance is only temporary. I don't know why but I keep feeling like our relationship will change some how. I completely trust him but it is so darn hard to keep negative thoughts at bay. I don't know how I am going to get through this.
Since he will be stuck in Canada for another year, our plans are for me to move up there for 6 months or so. It is not as easy for me since I have a child. Yes, I know talking once a day is not bad. I'm being overly emotional about this.
I suppose it depends on where he is, for one. Some places make it more likely that people will grow apart than others. And yes-- what you're experiencing now is more like what most LDRs are like. There's not much I can think of that you can do besides for both of you to give it your best effort, without smothering each other, and cross your fingers.
Since he will be stuck in Canada for another year, our plans are for me to move up there for 6 months or so. It is not as easy for me since I have a child. Yes, I know talking once a day is not bad. I'm being overly emotional about this.
Does he feel that he is stuck in Canada? If so, I'm sure the Canadians will not want to keep him any longer than he wants to be there.
You guys are definitely right. Shorter than a military LDR and we still have the option to speak every day. I understand this and know many people have it a lot worse off. But it doesn't meant that it isn't still difficult. I think the biggest problem I have is that I felt like a priority when he was in Canada because he called me all the time. But now I don't feel like a priority. He does not think anything is different besides us speaking less. But it has been a total shell shock to me
We have plans to be together when he goes back to canada around the end of March. But for some reason I feel like things will change between us. Is it because I am currently overreacting and overthinking this right now? Everything is still normal but I'm making up situations in my head?
Have a radio station call him up and tell him that he's been chosen to gift a dozen red romantic roses to anyone he wants. If he sends them to you, then you have nothing to worry about. If he sends them to someone else, then you have something to worry about. Radio stations love doing this kind of "set-up."
This station does it, every hour, during morning drive...
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