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My friend has been dating a woman for some time now. Other friends and I warned him about her. She has falsely accused 3 different guys of a serious crime they didn’t commit. The woman later admitted lying about it. On top of that, the woman has mental health issues that’s controlled with medication.
I have nothing against people with mental illness but sometimes it’s best to keep them at arm’s length. My friend turns a blind eye to what she has done in the past. It’s sad to see my friend willing to risk everything and his reputation for a woman.
Hell no & if he continues dating her knowing all this, he's stupid.
Some guys are just plain dumb or for some reason "desperate" to be not by themselves.
My besty is like that. He divorced his wife, left and within 2 months hooked up with his an ex from his past that broke his heart.
Granted his wife screwed up (she basically drinks all day and ignores him), but she was actually trying to be better at the end. He left anyways.
I know for a fact that he met up with his ex when he was still living with his wife. I don't think he cheated, but he told me how he ran into her at a function, etc.
I told him what I thought about his ex... but he will have no part in it... she's fine, etc etc.
I give up. He's a big boy, he can do whatever he wants and associated with whomever his heart desires.
I suspect your friend is the same. Just tell him what you think, and let him be and like everyone says - do not be in a room by yourself with that woman.
I could write an entire book on someone I was involved with who was like this. She was probably even worse than the woman your friend is seeing, but without knowing her, I can't say that for sure.
I once was briefly involved with someone, who had severe mental problems, as well as drug problems. I don't think she ever falsely accused anyone of crimes, as in actually reported them and filled out police reports, but she would go around saying that this person and that person did this or that to her or her friends. I'm pretty sure these ''Friends'' were made up. Anybody that she knew, she would say something like ''Yeah, I know them. That mother****er stole from me''. EVERYBODY STOLE SOMETHING FROM HER! Everything from cars (LOL) to money, to clothes. After she got mad at me, she threatened (by text, how stupid could she be?) me about a rape kit, despite very consensual sex. After I called her out on that after she had calmed down, she said she was just saying that because I pissed her off. I made sure to save every text from her after that.
Really, she probably needed tons of meds, which I know she was prescribed tons of meds and she always remembered when they needed to be picked up (which was at a pharmacy about 35 miles away, one way), but I'm pretty sure she didn't remember when to take them.
She got to be too much. She would expect me to come over, then give me the same speech about why I'm the reason this and that is happening to her or has happened to her. She claimed that she had cancer FOUR TIMES and beat it and I think she was pretending to have gotten it again at that time. And I'm gonna cause it to kill her this time. For the longest time she maintained that I got her kicked out of where she was staying because I wasn't supposed to be there and she kept having me over, so she was evicted. When in reality it was because she started baking cinnamon rolls and she fell asleep with them in the oven and someone came home to find them burning. In her sick mind, she's probably still saying ''I ****in lost everything because of him'', even though she was welcomed back there within a month or so. She constantly talked about how I was a narcissist, but in reality, she was talking about herself and projecting it on me.
After FINALLY cutting ties with this very sick woman, who I wasn't involved with for long at all, just a few months, but I think I was involved for probably two to three times longer than I should have been, I get a call from her mom. This is like 7-8 months later. She asked me if I could help her son and his girlfriend move, as they had some heavy stuff and just needed another body to help lift things. I said it's no problem. Now where they were moving to, was right next door to where the sick woman I was involved with was living. So as I'm helping them, she sees me there and starts screaming, going crazy, calling me names. She didn't really cross the line in my mind until she blurted out accusations that I had sex with her 16 year old niece. I'm friendly with her brother's girlfriend, who was there to see the whole thing. We just giggled about it afterwards and had a good laugh about it.
One other bit of amusing details I left out. At some point between me cutting off contact with her and helping the brother and his girlfriend move, her brother ran into me and said no less than 4 times in 10-15 seconds ''It's good you got away from her''.
By the way, this is not a really young woman. Reading this story back makes it seem like this is a teenage or early 20's woman. This is a woman that was 36-37 years old during the time of these events.
I could write a whole chapter of an autobiography about my silly ordeals with this woman. Just for the comic relief aspect. But for the insanity and drama aspect, I think the brief involvement with her might make people lose interest in my life story, once they got to that chapter.
This is why I could never write a book. I tend to forget and leave some of the best parts out after I've already written things.
One of the best parts is that this woman had been married FOUR times. I'm pretty sure ALL by 30 years old. Her memory was so bad that even she didn't know how old she was when certain things happened or how old other people were, so I had to try to piece it together myself.
Her first marriage I think was when she was very young. Late teens/early 20's and I think it was to guy either or around her age. Not sure how long this one lasted. Couldn't have been more than a couple years.
Next marriage (I think this was the second one) was to a guy that was 10 or 12 years older than her. I had to look him up to find out how old he was. She was somewhere around mid to late 20's when they married. I think that marriage lasted roughly a year. I looked the guy up and found him on Facebook (I didn't make correspondence with any of these guys, just wanted to get an idea of who they were) and he seemed like an intelligent guy with a pretty good career. No wonder that didn't last. She still has his last name.
I think the third marriage was to what friends of mine who knew her before I did, described as an ''Older man, definitely in his late 50's or even older at that time''. and I estimated this to be around 2012 or 2014, which would have made her 28-30. One of her tall tales was that he was involved in a drug cartel. She claims he saw a demonic spirit (no, seriously, this is what she said) at the end of the road when they vacationed at her parents and he left her there. And never returned. Seems like this marriage was definitely gold digging, but this guy obviously wasn't putting up with her. I don't doubt he saw a demonic spirit, I just think what he saw was her. She claims she's still married to this guy legally, but he refuses to divorce her, even though he has nothing to gain from staying married to her. I'm not sure if she hopes that when he dies she gets something, because apparently he did have money. I'm pretty sure this was marriage three and not two, but she still has husband #2's last name, but says they're not married and the guy she is married to legally is not the one with the last name she has.
Fourth marriage wasn't really a marriage, but she claimed that it was a ''Marriage in the eyes of god''. He was about 10 years older and they were together for what she says was 3 years, but it had to be on and off. And he was a known violent woman beater and raging drug addict with serious anger problems. I knew he was before I knew her, so I can actually attest to all of this and his abuse. He beat her so bad once, got sent away for a while and she took him back. They were staying at his mom's house for a while and either his mom or the stepdad said something to set him off one night, which seemed to happen a whole lot from everything I've heard from people who knew him. He tried to go after his mother (another thing that seemed to happen a whole lot) and the stepdad came back with a gun and had to put him down. Shot him dead. And the stepdad got off for it because by all counts the guy was a violent POS and really got what he deserved. He really had it coming for a long time. And I know a lot of people who knew him, unlike any of these other guys she was with. So I believe all the stories about him. Only she will tell you he's the greatest thing and how much she loves and misses him. And that he did beat on her, but he loved her and blah, blah, blah, ****ing blah.
She never had kids, but claimed she had I forgot if it was 2 or 3 abortions (I'm skeptical) and gave birth to a stillborn. Again, also skeptical. Between those stories and the fake cancer claims, you can't believe anything she says.
This was a supremely toxic person. Part of me gives her a pass because I don't think she could control half her problems, but I didn't wanna put up with it and I don't think many people will.
Some people have said ''Oh, she's a piece of ****''. And my response is ''Nah, she's not a piece of ****. A piece of **** won't kill you, but something toxic sure will''.
All in all, I have to say she was one of the most fascinating people I've met in life, but for all the wrong reasons.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by HappyFarm34
My friend has been dating a woman for some time now. Other friends and I warned him about her. She has falsely accused 3 different guys of a serious crime they didn’t commit. The woman later admitted lying about it. On top of that, the woman has mental health issues that’s controlled with medication.
I have nothing against people with mental illness but sometimes it’s best to keep them at arm’s length. My friend turns a blind eye to what she has done in the past. It’s sad to see my friend willing to risk everything and his reputation for a woman.
I would have headed out when multiple people went out of their way to warn me about her. One false accusation may be able to be explained away. Three? If anyone engages with this woman, they will be number four.
My ex, an attorney, charged me some very serious crimes. It is VERY destructive and takes a toll on a person that is unimaginable. When you are not used to living in that sort of societal hell, it takes an even larger toll.
I fought it, and thanks to some communication between my Criminal Attorney (aside and apart from my Divorce Attorney) and the DA, things were sorted out.
But i lived a nightmarish existence for many months.
Subsequently, SHE had to carry this reputation. Dated one guy for a while that i know of, and since has been banished as an evil monster who spends her time getting sloshed with her sister.
My ex, an attorney, charged me some very serious crimes. It is VERY destructive and takes a toll on a person that is unimaginable. When you are not used to living in that sort of societal hell, it takes an even larger toll.
I fought it, and thanks to some communication between my Criminal Attorney (aside and apart from my Divorce Attorney) and the DA, things were sorted out.
But i lived a nightmarish existence for many months.
Subsequently, SHE had to carry this reputation. Dated one guy for a while that i know of, and since has been banished as an evil monster who spends her time getting sloshed with her sister.
Karma is a B.
Well anybody who is making false accusations is bad enough, but an actual attorney who files false charges is a lot worse!
It seems risky. But also not much of your business. Tell him what she has done, and after that it is his decision. He knows, you don't have to nag him about it.
In the meantime, make sure you are never alone with her.
Some of us have friends who are morons.
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