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Sounds like she's sleeping her way through the town/city's men until she hits on the one who wants to worship at the feet of a hysterical, promiscuous, entitled snob. Be glad it's not you!
What are you trying to work out? You had two dates and boinked. That's literally nothing and ya'll are fighting and crying already? Seriously?
C'mon dude, you know the answer.
Oh the drama... wow.
Kids have to learn what is important when they are looking at potential relationships. Whatever else she has going on that seems positive, her behavior here trumps that. At least she didn't try to hide it.
Seriously she did you a huge favor before you invest any more time and energy on her. Imagine if this is her on her best behavior Because let's face it people try harder in the beginning. Imagine what this would be like when she's bored, over tired, cranky and passive aggressive resentful to you.
Unless you're exaggerating her remarks or omitting some crucial details, she sounds mean spirited and definitely elitist.
On the 2nd date is still the honeymoon, and all parties tend to be "extra nice" in this stage... can you even imagine after 2 yrs of being steady... let alone married with kids.
BTW a PHD means nothing in the scheme of things. Money is nice, but it's not a reason to be with somebody.
You know her better than any of us and are the best judge whether to give her another chance or not. She has one huge strike against herself, so another one would end the game. It's no 3 strike rule in this case... unless you guys intend to just make the relationship about boinking... then I guess it's okay.
I still think maybe she got a lesson in how her attitude is not acceptable. She seemed genuinely shocked that she had been offensive. She’s obviously a product of her upbringing, as we all are, and we all learn from our mistakes. If she was 40 I’d think differently.
I still say, I’d give her another chance. It would be too bad if she’s learned a life lesson from OP, but then goes on to marry and live happily ever after with a guy who has a fleet of garbage trucks.
Why would you want to deal w/ that? BE DONE. With her blunt personality, she's definitely going to say & do other things down the road that you won't like I'm pretty positive. So it's best to end it now. And for her having a PhD, I don't know why why she's crying. She may be booksmart, but doesn't seem that emotionally mature. I know I in hell wouldnn't want a person like that!
Funny how she's so, "blunt", yet so weak too (already crying for nothing). A mature person would just apologize for insulting your job and sensibly say that they probably shouldn't move forward w/ dating because it doesn't seem like they're compatible.
Another reason to not sleep w/ people so fast. How does anyone know anyone after barely 2 dates? People still don't know people after months. Must everyone have to have sex just because they're 2 consenting adults? Most people don't even know each other yet.
So I had a second date which led to sex. She is admittedly "blunt" and "tells it how it is", and as we were laying in bed she called my career meaningless and dismissively mentioned one of my job duties as if it was nothing special. I then told her that was rude, degrading, she attacked my career, and that I can't be with someone who doesn't respect my career. She immediately tried to backtrack but I told her she was now just trying to tell me what I wanted to hear and that the truth already came out. She has a PHD and has a high paying career in the medical field and comes from a rich successful family (which means nothing to me). I have a decent upper middle class career and come from a middle class to upper middle class family. Early that night I also think she had a reaction I didn't care for regarding the college I graduated from. After I said my piece I told her I was leaving (was going to spend the night) and she was crying and apologizing the whole time.
Now I'm trying to figure out if I over reacted and should ask her out again or just call it all off. There has been a decent connection between us and a physical attraction. Sex was great, but I will not date someone who looks down on my career and definitely not someone who will openly put down my career to my face.
Do you really need insight into whether being with someone who belittles you (from your pov), is any good for you?
Overreacted? Yeah, a little bit. Your best reaction would have been to laugh it off. It sounds like you got your back up over an unintended slight and are the one who turned it into a fight.
If she is young, you could have laughed it off and then pointed out later, and very calmly, that what she said was hurtful. Maybe that would have made her more sensitive, maybe not. Maybe the relationship could have been salvaged, maybe not.
But it is over now, so no more sex for you. At some point, maybe figure out that your job is not you and it doesn't define who you are.
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