How do I get him to like me? Mixed signals? (dating, boyfriend)
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I met this guy at a party and we hung out for 5 hours just talking. He told me he wanted to ask me out and I said sure and we kissed a lot that night LOL. We spoke for a while after but never ended up going out because college was over and we lived in different countries. For reference this was in late April. In mid july i decide to text him again and we have nice conversation! ... for 3 days before he ghosts me. It ended on a super weird note where he asked me a bunch of questions and then ghosted my responses. So i decide to forget about him. The semester starts and I run into him one night, or well i see him from afar. He sees me too and is smiling and talking to his friend. I ask (from very far away, a distant shout) "Do I know you?" and he waves his hand. We walk our different ways with our friends. The next day, his best friend (who I had met the first night we met too through him) sent me a follow request and then immediately unsent it. My question is -- is it weird if I say hi if we run into each other again? He was a really nice guy and we got along well. I honestly dont know why he ghosted me and that prevents me from making any conversation if we ever run into each other. My friends say it shouldnt affect me and I can say hi because its not that big of a deal but idk. Is there any hope that we could start talking again? Turning to this forum for advice now. Wanna add that we're back at college and its super small so we will probably run into each other again. Also i am a girl.
Last edited by strangerthingsstan386; 09-20-2022 at 05:26 PM..
I met this guy at a party and we hung out for 5 hours just talking. He told me he wanted to ask me out and I said sure and we kissed a lot that night LOL. We spoke for a while after but never ended up going out because college was over and we lived in different countries. For reference this was in late April. In mid july i decide to text him again and we have nice conversation! ... for 3 days before he ghosts me. It ended on a super weird note where he asked me a bunch of questions and then ghosted my responses. So i decide to forget about him. The semester starts and I run into him one night, or well i see him from afar. He sees me too and is smiling and talking to his friend. I ask (from very far away, a distant shout) "Do I know you?" and he waves his hand. We walk our different ways with our friends. The next day, his best friend (who I had met the first night we met too through him) sent me a follow request and then immediately unsent it. My question is -- is it weird if I say hi if we run into each other again? He was a really nice guy and we got along well. I honestly dont know why he ghosted me and that prevents me from making any conversation if we ever run into each other. My friends say it shouldnt affect me and I can say hi because its not that big of a deal but idk. Is there any hope that we could start talking again? Turning to this forum for advice now.
Every time a guy goes to you it's for the same reason he's not interested move on.
I don't think casual talk is fun, honestly, as you have history with him. Try to meet up with him in-person and get to the point.
I mean, yeah, I'd start off with "hi" "how're you", but then keep talking if he lets you. If he starts to sway away at any point, you have your answer and move on like previous poster said.
Otherwise, ask something like "Are you staying in this area? Would you like to keep more natural contact again? Why did you ghost me? Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
You were in different countries before, and most potential relationships don't last through something like that. People usually just start over or both people would've moved to said country.
OP, are you a guy or girl, if I may ask?
Maybe a "guy" because you have "Stan" in your nickname and you presumably like "Stranger Things"?
In today's dating scene, you'll run into that situation over and over again. Things will seem like they're getting interesting and then suddenly fall flat. That's generally because today's online dating apps and social media makes everyone feel like they have an endless list of options all the time.
While it's tempting to be proud and just drop out as soon as the other person doesn't seem to be prioritizing you, I think there's very little to lose in actually going for it in a kind of... undeniable way.
You have him in your contacts. You both met at a bad timing but now college is resuming. If you want to know if he'd be interested now? Why not just reach out to him and be totally upfront about it: "hey I saw you the other day. I had a great time with you last semester. How'd you like a drink on Thursday?"
That's not "needy". That's direct. You'll remove all room for speculation about whether he's just too shy to contact you after all this time, did he ask his friend to contact you then thought it'd be weird, yatti yatta. You just ask him out straight up, in a way that, if he doesn't get back to you shortly, or if he responds in a weirdly evasive manner, you'll know it's dead. Conversely, a guy who's interested will jump right on that. Either way, you'll know what's up within a day.
If you get rejected, so what? It happens every day, and it's worth getting used to shrugging it off.
I met this guy at a party and we hung out for 5 hours just talking. He told me he wanted to ask me out and I said sure and we kissed a lot that night LOL. We spoke for a while after but never ended up going out because college was over and we lived in different countries. For reference this was in late April. In mid july i decide to text him again and we have nice conversation! ... for 3 days before he ghosts me. It ended on a super weird note where he asked me a bunch of questions and then ghosted my responses. So i decide to forget about him. The semester starts and I run into him one night, or well i see him from afar. He sees me too and is smiling and talking to his friend. I ask (from very far away, a distant shout) "Do I know you?" and he waves his hand. We walk our different ways with our friends. The next day, his best friend (who I had met the first night we met too through him) sent me a follow request and then immediately unsent it. My question is -- is it weird if I say hi if we run into each other again? He was a really nice guy and we got along well. I honestly dont know why he ghosted me and that prevents me from making any conversation if we ever run into each other. My friends say it shouldnt affect me and I can say hi because its not that big of a deal but idk. Is there any hope that we could start talking again? Turning to this forum for advice now. Wanna add that we're back at college and its super small so we will probably run into each other again. Also i am a girl.
First of all, you can't "get anyone to like you". You can't force attraction on another nor can you make them feel a certain way. A person can't help who they are attracted to, so I would just move on. He's had every chance to approach you if he wanted to. He's not interested. When a guy is interested in you, you know it. Always go with your gut instinct too.
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