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i have to agree with everyone and the poster that suggested that you're not feeling love but rather lust is dead on. You saw a pic, big deal. She probably sends that pic to every other guy that asks her for it - she might not even be a she! You sound young - I know no one in their 30s or 40s would act this way. You have to be really careful when meeting people online - look at your venue too, a game site? Try to think logically and I'd leave this one alone - you way overdid it by saying you love someoene without even meeting to or talking to that girl. Just try to be smarter next time and not come on so strong.
I need help with some love advice. I met this girl on an online internet game called Counter Strike Source. Dont know if anyone has hered of it. Well, the story goes like this. I met her while i was playing this game. She was very nice to me and it looked like we were starting to hit it off. I asked her if she could send me pictures of her (that way i could see who i was talking to). When she sent me the pictures, i was basically lovestruck by her beauty and i wanted to persue things futher. The only form of contact i have with her is through email. Ive tried asking for her phone number, but no luck. ive told her that i love her deeply, but i dont know how she really feels. She keeps on sending me mixed messages about how she fels about me. I really love this girl. How do i start this kind of relationship with her without overdoing it? Is it wrong to love someone deeply? Can that be misconstrude and taken the wrong way? Any one have any feedback and help?
You developing a liking and a crush on this female member of an internet game is not all that uncommon. How far away from you does she live? How long have you been messaging her? How old are the two of you?
I agree with the others that telling her that you love her was a mistake. After all, you've never even met her in person. Even if you feel that you are in love with her, without the two of you meeting in person first, your claim of love probably put her off. At the very least, if she's got any commonsense at all, it made her put the brakes on your growing friendship.
I think that you should focus more on your friendship in your future messages to her. It's okay to refer to her as your dream girl or ideal woman, and it's okay to tell her that she's cool and has great game playing skills. Don't focus on the sexy stuff and instead be her best friend and confidante first. Do you have similar academic goals? Do you both want to go to college? What about your life goals? And as to meeting her, maybe there is a group activity, like a gaming convention, that you both might enjoy going to. And even then, both of you bring friends along. But don't put pressure on her by telling her that you love her and want to spend the rest of your life with her. And don't suggest meeting just the two of you and alone.
I met my boyfriend online on a car message board. We really hit it off personality wise. We were online friends for six months, became best friends and took a trip together to meet some other board members. What made me feel very comfortable about him was that he didn't ask me for pictures of myself and never came on to me romantically or sexually. And because of that, I felt that he was really interested in our friendship and not in a internet hookup.
What you men don't seem to always realize is that as a female in a male dominated internet area like a gaming site or a car message board, we naturally getting flirted with by most of the males there and asked for our pictures. So you telling her that you love her or being flirty with her is very commonplace and not that special to her. And it wouldn't surprise me if she has several guys on your gaming site trying to be her internet boyfriend at the same time as you.
But what would be special is if you tone down the love stuff a lot and just stick to being friends with her for now. And she will feel the friendship is more real if you show her respect by not asking her for special (revealing or sexy) pictures of her or push her to declare more loving feelings towards you. And the longer you maintain this type of relationship of steady consistent friendship, the more she will consider you a true friend and not some typical guy groupie from her gaming site that has a crush on her.
What you men don't seem to always realize is that as a female in a male dominated internet area like a gaming site or a car message board, we naturally getting flirted with by most of the males there and asked for our pictures. So you telling her that you love her or being flirty with her is very commonplace and not that special to her. And it wouldn't surprise me if she has several guys on your gaming site trying to be her internet boyfriend at the same time as you.
Miu... this is very painful for me, because I have never agreed with anything you have ever said in any of your posts. But... I have to admit (as painful as it it)... you are sooooo completely right with this statement. If any woman wants to build her self-esteem post a picture on a site like hotornot.com (a pg site.. no bad pics!!!) or join a chat room and make it clear that you're a woman. There's enough wolves to make all of us men seem like pigs. I can do that well enough on my own!
But as they all said... take your time.. what's the rush? Get to know her... really know her (if she'll let you). Then, give her the lead. You'll know if she's interested or not.
Send her your ss number, full name and date of birth, then if your credit score drops and bill collectors start calling you'll know it was just a 43 year old unemployed, alchoholic typewriter repairman but it will save you a lot of heartache.
Or you may just want to watch the crying game at least once.
Location: Visitation between Wal-Mart & Home Depot
8,309 posts, read 38,782,175 times
Reputation: 7185
Quote:
Originally Posted by Acecombat
I need help with some love advice. I met this girl on an online internet game called Counter Strike Source. Dont know if anyone has hered of it. Well, the story goes like this. I met her while i was playing this game. She was very nice to me and it looked like we were starting to hit it off. I asked her if she could send me pictures of her (that way i could see who i was talking to). When she sent me the pictures, i was basically lovestruck by her beauty and i wanted to persue things futher. The only form of contact i have with her is through email. Ive tried asking for her phone number, but no luck. ive told her that i love her deeply, but i dont know how she really feels. She keeps on sending me mixed messages about how she fels about me. I really love this girl. How do i start this kind of relationship with her without overdoing it? Is it wrong to love someone deeply? Can that be misconstrude and taken the wrong way? Any one have any feedback and help?
She sounds like a real keeper. If I met a girl in a Halo tournament who was really hot I would also tell her I loved her and that we should settle down, buy a small house with a big TV, plug in the 360 and just be overwhelmed with bliss forever after.
The problem is, that girl is actually a 34 year old male web-developer in Iowa who goes to Star Trek conventions and DragonCon every year, has never had a girlfriend, hasn't shaved or showered in weeks, is 80 lbs. over (or possibly under) weight and gets sick jollies from leading on high school boys.
In light of this development, YES, it is wrong to love him deeply. Put down the control pad and get to church.
The problem is, that girl is actually a 34 year old male web-developer in Iowa who goes to Star Trek conventions and DragonCon every year, has never had a girlfriend, hasn't shaved or showered in weeks, is 80 lbs. over (or possibly under) weight and gets sick jollies from leading on high school boys.
LMAO! This is great... you forgot the surgically altered Vulcan ears!
I have nothing left to say.... except....agreed to all posters.
I notice there seems to be a wide variety of ages among posters here. Some are obviously very young. I sincerely hope that when they take the time to ask for advice that they will seriously consider the advice they receive from older, wiser posters. Not saying older is better, just more experienced. So in a case like this one when everyone is pretty much advising the same thing I would hope Acecombat gives it some serious thought
Location: Visitation between Wal-Mart & Home Depot
8,309 posts, read 38,782,175 times
Reputation: 7185
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesMountains
I notice there seems to be a wide variety of ages among posters here. Some are obviously very young. I sincerely hope that when they take the time to ask for advice that they will seriously consider the advice they receive from older, wiser posters. Not saying older is better, just more experienced. So in a case like this one when everyone is pretty much advising the same thing I would hope Acecombat gives it some serious thought
I can read this two ways:
1) Accept the advice that is grounded in reality.
In which case I whole-heartedly agree.
2) Accept the kind and nurturing advice from wise older people who seem to actually want you to meet this "girl" who is in all likely hood a serial killer.
In which case it is only prudent to advise that older, wiser advice must be taken with a grain of salt.
2) Accept the kind and nurturing advice from wise older people who seem to actually want you to meet this "girl" who is in all likely hood a serial killer.
In which case it is only prudent to advise that older, wiser advice must be taken with a grain of salt.
Guess I missed the post where anyone advised he meet this "girl" (we really don't know if this person is a girl - you are right!). At the most, people advised trying to build a friendship online thru instant message, and maybe to eventually get a phone number. But I don't think any of us are recommending he try to meet this person right away! Perhaps you could copy the posts I obviously missed?
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