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It's a long stroy I'll just make it short. I met this guy 8 months ago. He's a business man at his 40's, never been married. We met on internet.The first time I saw him, it was like I got struck by the lightning, he's tall, fit, good-looking, educated and very smart. I can not help but fall in love with him at the first sight which I never belived will happen to me. The feeling was so strong that I let him kissed me at the first met and the second day we went to bed.
Since then he's been on and off, we kinda fall into the "friends with benifits" catagory although I want more than that.
I feel he's been pretty aloof to me when he doesn't "need" me, he can go travle for one month without leaving me any message, I never know when I can see him again but I never bothered to ask either.
He never said he loved me untill recently, he start saying that he loves me and want us to be together. I belived him because he's not a man utter the word" love" easily and being a mature man I think he knows what he's talking about. But he never metioned we should move in together. I just don't know how we can be" together".
Then it was independent day, I was hoping we could spend that day together but he didn't say anything, i spent that day alone feeling lonely and abandoned wondering where he is and what is he doing.
the last straw was when he said we should go to movie on a sunday, then he just disappeared after saying that(on line), and he got back late at night, totally forgot that he said we should go to movie.
I felt so hurt, I don't want to complain neither do I want to be a drama queen, so I just said to him that I'm tired and goodbye. He said he doesn't want to say goodbye, I didn't eighter, in the deep of my heart I still miss him so much.
I haven't logged on MSN to meet him ever since i said goodbye but I do miss him so much. I don't know what to do.
I would stay signed off from MSN, and move on.
8 months is a long time to be with someone and not know where you really stand with the relationship. It sounds like he had it made.
I agree with yankee, stay signed off. Sounds like you felt more for him than he felt for you. Makes me think of the phrase "he's just not that into you".
Well, you either stay in this status quo if it works for you (it seems it doesn't) or you move on... The chances of him changing are slim to none. You sound pretty young to me, so it'd be in your best interest to move on. I know, easier said than done, but while this kind of arrangement may work for more mature women later in life, it's certainly not the best for you. There's no need to shortchange yourself - plenty of fish in the sea. I can see you're awestruck by his charm, intellect, and adventurous spirit (we've all been there); however, this type of man is nothing but trouble and heartbreak if you're thinking a long-term and serious relationship.
He sounds like he's married and you don't realize it.
Yes, my thoughts exactly.
Hate to be harsh, but I'm sure he doesn't love you, but I bet he loves the situation.
Any abrupt endings to conversations and unexplained absences really are like a red flag.
You should say good bye and move on to someone who shows you they love you by their actions, someone who is reliable, does what they say they will, some one who tells you where they are and what they're doing.
I know, trust me I know, that it would seem that once a man had got into his 40s he'd be reliable and not capable of bs, but unfortunately that is not always the case. Sometimes people lie, big, fat lies, right to your face, no matter what their age.
You deserve to be happy and feeling secure, from what you're saying here you feel neither. Chalk this one up to experience and move on.
It was a fling. Move on and get over him. He's not interested. From experience, men are not quite as emotional as women. They think black and white, they don't have the capacity to get so deep. Women are more emotional and read more into what the men do.
[quote=mlammons;4410756]I agree with yankee, stay signed off. Sounds like you felt more for him than he felt for you. Makes me think of the phrase "he's just not that into you".[/quo
The phrase is also a really frat book written especially for you! Stay of line until you read it!
First of all you need to watch who you met on the net Please. You slept with him to fast that was not a good idea you should have give him something to come back for. If you had made him wait then if he came back strong that meant he wanted you. Never sleep with any man in the first week I have been there I know how it can be.
As painful as it is, you already know the answer. It may have been magic on Day 1 but that's all over now. From Day 2 to 8 months later this relationship has been nothing that you want.
I sense in your words a deep sadness. If you were my sister or my mother I would kick his azz.
MOVE ON...
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