Does counseling really work? (date, how to, married, conversation)
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Excellent point. A psychologist should be qualified and open minded enough to help most people with so called "issues" and "neurosis".....how many years of education did they get and how many hours of training do they do before they're able to take an exam to get a license to practice...ya know...
.....how many years of education did they get and how many hours of training do they do before they're able to take an exam to get a license to practice...ya know...
All that education and charge all that money to do what a good friend does for free.
My point is that by then, you shouldn't have to jump around to find a good fit. They should be professional enough to help pretty much anyone.
But they don't. And they don't really care anyway. They are there for the money. A good friend is there because he/she actually likes you and honestly cares.
I don't go dumping on my friends, but they sometimes come to me. No charge.
I always felt if two people who love each other but can't see eye to eye can benefit from counseling. If one or both parties has the love no amount of counseling is going to bring it back.
My husband and I did see a counselor briefly for some issues and then I saw her after that about some issues of my own. She helped me personally tremendously and helped us see some things in our marriage that needed changing. Now of course, we were not in serious trouble. We just had a few issues, and I was personally dealing with some issues following our son's death about 2 years prior to that. Not "grief oriented" issues but relating to some circumstances resulting from his death. I think she was truly a God-send at that time in my life. She helped me with the circumstances at the time and also with some self-understanding that even at age 48, I had never had before. (I wish we had known her right after our loss, but we didn't at that time.)
In short, does counseling help? I think it depends on why you are seeing the counselor and who the counselor is. Some are definitely better than others, and I think some may just be more "simpatico" with what you need if that makes any sense. As driftwood said too, a good "match" is essential. You won't have to spend a fortune finding that generally. Just be aware that if the first counselor you go to doesn't seem like someone you can relate to, don't go back. At least try someone else. Counselors are not created equal.
^ actually you will have to spend a fortune if all the counselors have that same philosophy, "that client should relate to the counselor if not then buzz off." The counselor is supposed to help regardless of being able to relate or not, it is a JOB ....
^ actually you will have to spend a fortune if all the counselors have that same philosophy, "that client should relate to the counselor if not then buzz of." The counselor is supposed to help regardless of being able to relate or not, it is a JOB ....
It's like anything else. No matter how carefully you explain to a hairdresser what haircut you want, you end up getting the haircut he/she can and does give and that's it. In other words, if the therapist doesn't have your particular psychosis, go to somebody who does.
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Now if they light up a unity candle and walk always together, it might work out.
