Does online dating favor women?? (younger, friends, daughter, internet)
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Well try to keep this in mind too. You might feel like it's outnumbered by men BUT mot of the man on dating sites are married! I can't begin to tell you how many winks, emails, etc I would get only to find out they are married. So legitimately, the ones who ARE actually single and looking I don't feel outnumbers the women.
This has been something I have noted too. Women get more attention on these sites BUT guys are more likely to be dishonest about their profile (my opinion). So, I think it's harder for honest guys with positive attributes to get noticed.
KEY POINT FOR THE LADIES: Pick out some guys. I have mainly been dating gals that have picked or contacted me because frankly I have had zero luck with any that I have tried to contact. (Lost in the pile so to speak.)
Location: On the "Left Coast", somewhere in "the Land of Fruits & Nuts"
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Originally Posted by Mathguy
This has been something I have noted too. Women get more attention on these sites BUT guys are more likely to be dishonest about their profile (my opinion). So, I think it's harder for honest guys with positive attributes to get noticed.
KEY POINT FOR THE LADIES: Pick out some guys. I have mainly been dating gals that have picked or contacted me because frankly I have had zero luck with any that I have tried to contact. (Lost in the pile so to speak.)
Dunno about the female side of it, but after a divorce, not long ago I was pretty active in online dating, and noticed several things.
First, there's opportunity for dishonesty on both sides, and my own experience was that the women were very often significantly older-looking and heavier in person than their profile pic indicated.
Second, no doubt the "lookers" are always going to be overwhelmed with offers of all kinds, just like the help-wanted ads for companies advertising "dream jobs".
Third, there seems to be alot of women on the online sites who claim to be looking for a "partner" or a LTR (long term relationship), when eventually it becomes clear that they were never really that sure what the heck they want, but it's so easy to post a pic and a profile, and just see what "nibbles". So you have to learn how to "filter out" the ones that aren't so serious to begin with. Not naming any names, but noticed that a couple of the single posters here fit that description, judging from their comments in other treads. Personally, I think the "free" dating sites have many more of these folks, since the "cost of entry" is so low.
Fourth, speaking of "filters", my own personal "red flag" is when they don't just "love" their dog, they "L-o-o-o-v-e" their dog! Message: you're constantly going to be competing with "Bowser" for this woman's affection and attention. "Must love dogs", etc. or "Spot is my Best Friend" are often good tipoffs, along with separate pics of the dog!
Fifth (and this a plus for guys), this is an arena where the playing field is much more level, and where it's also acceptable for women to sometimes make the first move, occasionally with a short note or just an email "wink", etc.. But make sure you have an interesting ad, and if you're a guy saying "hi" to a woman that caught your eye, write something engaging, or that at least looks like you read their profile!
Finally, to repeat the "job" metaphor, don't get discouraged and remember that everything worthwhile also takes a certain amount of persistence.
Dunno about the female side of it, but after a divorce, not long ago I was pretty active in online dating, and noticed several things.
First, there's opportunity for dishonesty on both sides, and my own experience was that the women were very often significantly older-looking and heavier in person than their profile pic indicated.
Second, no doubt the "lookers" are always going to be overwhelmed with offers of all kinds, just like the help-wanted ads for companies advertising "dream jobs".
Third, there seems to be alot of women on the online sites who claim to be looking for a "partner" or a LTR (long term relationship), when eventually it becomes clear that they were never really that sure what the heck they want, but it's so easy to post a pic and a profile, and just see what "nibbles". So you have to learn how to "filter out" the ones that aren't so serious to begin with. Not naming any names, but noticed that a couple of the single posters here fit that description, judging from their comments in other treads. Personally, I think the "free" dating sites have many more of these folks, since the "cost of entry" is so low.
Fourth, speaking of "filters", my own personal "red flag" is when they don't just "love" their dog, they "L-o-o-o-v-e" their dog! Message: you're constantly going to be competing with "Bowser" for this woman's affection and attention. "Must love dogs", etc. or "Spot is my Best Friend" are often good tipoffs, along with separate pics of the dog!
Fifth (and this a plus for guys), this is an arena where the playing field is much more level, and where it's also acceptable for women to sometimes make the first move, occasionally with a short note or just an email "wink", etc.. But make sure you have an interesting ad, and if you're a guy saying "hi" to a woman that caught your eye, write something engaging, or that at least looks like you read their profile!
Finally, to repeat the "job" metaphor, don't get discouraged and remember that everything worthwhile also takes a certain amount of persistence.
Good comments.
I think the whole "long term" or "dating" terms get abused quite a bit anyway because for some, they just won't put dating even if that's what they want because of the casual sex implication. (Or so I have heard)
Lol...a gal I recently started dating is a major dog nut so we will see if your theory holds true.
I liked online dating...it was tiring though...sifting through emails...trying to decide which profile is actually the real deal...One thing I like about it is getting to know a little bit about the person before you meet them...and when I decided to actually meet them in person, a coffee shop is usually a good meeting place...
I tried Match (that was like a meat market...) I met some pretty good ones on Eharmony..and Yahoo personals...was just a waste of time.
I do generally think it favors women mostly...but it favors guys too...especially if he has the looks combined with an award winning strategic advertisement.
Not to go off on a Rant here but i seems to me that..
Online Dating is not so good for many guys.
Guys seem to outnumber women 4 to 1 on many sites.
Married guys enter the mix as well(maybe 25% are married)
A Women just has to relax and pick throught the many emails...
Not that is so easy for the Women having creeps,married men and..
Guys only wanting sex emailing her.
Dating generally isnt fair for many guys in real life but online..
Even worse.
Oh yeah the internet is FOR women! If not for being able to make a mint just putting up their webcam,then just the dating sites alone!
I really started to notice this 'little known secret' back when I was in full searching mode in the late 90s/early 2000s...
I would meet women that would really know how to work the dating sites...they'd have all their responders and back up responders saved and they could just pick and choose. Meanwhile I was signed up on at least a dozen sites and got maybe a half dozen connections.
I also met women who weren't that internet savvy and were still meeting guys the 'old fashioned' way,and I surely wasn't going to let them in on the 'secret'
Just last week a woman I work with was all giddy talking about how many guys she was juggling...yea good for you hon,have fun..but don't get snagged!
If I found that a prospect had me in 'the mix' and I was losing her attention,I just dropped things right then and there. That's too much like the 'sausagefests' at the clubs
Ladies: Lots of predatory guys, scammers, outright liars, married guys etc. If you are attractive you will be buried in attention (see JeepGirl, who I finally realized has a picture on this forum....who not surprisingly still gets emails from guys after setting her profile to lesbian...lol)
Guys: The ladies are getting so much attention from the masquerading scum that it can be hard to get on the radar of a gal the calibre you are looking for. So basically, a decent looking guy with it all together is up against the hotter buff guy that lives in his friends basement and has a criminal record but says he is a successful businessman, humanitarium, blah blah blah.
With that said, I think it's easier for people looking for matches SOLELY based on looks and a whole lot harder for those of us looking for the complete package so to speak. There is a reason I've been working out 5 times a week for a little while now lol.
The first thing I think women who are online dating, and it looks like it might be heading somewhere, is to do a background check, especially a criminal one. When my husband and I were separated,I got into the online thing. It started the same way, emailing, talking on the phone and he eventually moved in. He had been living 2300 miles away before he moved in with me. I did see a lot of red flags, but chose to ignore them. He had without my knowledge told his boss and all the employees that we were married, and one day a card came to us as MR.& Mrs. I opened it, and it was a sympathy card and everyone had signed it. I called his employer and told them that everything he said was a lie. There was a lot more, but I won't bore you with it. It took the police to get him out, he had tried to strangle me. We found out about is record with the law, but it was too late by then. His Son called a year later and left a message with our answering service saying he died. He had stalked me for so long, I called the funeral home to make sure that he indeed was dead. It was such a relief. I know not all the guys online are like that, but you might want to see one that is not far from your area, so you can get to know his friends and family. I would never date online again even if I was single but I did learn a good lesson.
@Sassyone - that is really so stark!...I am always skeptical about meeting online guys offline....I normally prefer to test the veracity of the person by random phone calls etc ...if what you have said is true then i am really scared...people clink to be anyways when I am in office and I dont want tbe stalked!
@Sassyone - that is really so stark!...I am always skeptical about meeting online guys offline....I normally prefer to test the veracity of the person by random phone calls etc ...if what you have said is true then i am really scared...people clink to be anyways when I am in office and I dont want tbe stalked!
This statement sassy's said are true not only do I have pictures to prove it ( we have been friends ALONG time) but I also am one of the people that called some local cops I knew, I also called him and gave him 3 hours to get out. He was a creep and she did not tell you everything he did. He was a sociopath. I was so afraid for her and never so thankful to have anyone die. I can only imagine how many women he did this to or even actually killed. Be careful people and not just ladies. Sociopaths come in all sexes.
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