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Is he somehow sending out creepy vibes without realizing it?
This problem is isolated to this region. I've lived in several other states in three other regions and never experienced this despite the fact my behavior and interaction with the opposite sex was identical. If I was having this problem in other areas then yes, I would say that I am the problem.
This problem is isolated to this region. I've lived in several other states in three other regions and never experienced this despite the fact my behavior and interaction with the opposite sex was identical. If I was having this problem in other areas then yes, I would say that I am the problem.
I've heard nothing but great things about what a nice place Kansas City is to live
The point is, you can only change this reaction you are getting by changing something you are doing. Try to be as impartial and neutral as you can be in examining these interactions - think about what you can do differently.
I've heard nothing but great things about what a nice place Kansas City is to live
The point is, you can only change this reaction you are getting by changing something you are doing. Try to be as impartial and neutral as you can be in examining these interactions - think about what you can do differently.
It's a cultural issue. I'm from Connecticut and a different social level in society than the people I meet here. Women don't react like this in CT or any other state I've lived.
I've already reduced the amount of time I spend talking to women here, especially those that are single. If the problem continues I'll reduce it even further. That seems to be the only solution other than moving out of the area altogether. While that is my preference it may not be possible for a while due to the economy.
It's a cultural issue. I'm from Connecticut and a different social level in society than the people I meet here. Women don't react like this in CT or any other state I've lived.
I've already reduced the amount of time I spend talking to women here, especially those that are single. If the problem continues I'll reduce it even further. That seems to be the only solution other than moving out of the area altogether. While that is my preference it may not be possible for a while due to the economy.
I have a job that requires interaction with customers on a daily basis in Kansas City. I try to be cordial and friendly when dealing with my customers and often times I will engage in some chit chat with a few of them. Apparently some of the women seem to think I am hitting on them because I've had more than one tell me that they don't want to go out with me. This has also happened here when shopping in some of the local stores. Now since I generally keep the conversation light and always steer clear of topics that might be taken the wrong way, I am very confused.
Since it has happened more than once, this should tell you something. You are either talking to them for too long or too intimately or you are treating them like they are your "buddy." I don't know what it is, but it's clear that you need to reign in your interactions. Keep the conversations short and polite. Observe how other men interact with the same women and try to figure out what you are doing differently. But especially at work, I think it is best to keep things short and professional.
Remember, while at work, you are there to work. If the women are in the store, they are there to shop or do business. They are not there for conversation. Smile and do your job.
Personally, I do not like to interact with the sales clerks in a store. I'm there to run my errands or get something done. I'm not there to make friends. I might say hello or how are you, but that's really it.
Keep your head down and do your job. Don't make your life any more complicated then it already is.
I'm so glad I came across this post. This happens to me constantly. After you speak with them for a while, say your standing by a water cooler or even sitting across from them say on a couch or chair. Have you ever caught them looking at your pelvic area sometimes even staring, well just to be plain, are you one of those people,not unlike myself ,that have a bulge. i mean, i know that sounds crude,and I may not be Dr. Phil, but lets face it that can have an impact. well, I mean that's happened to me before a few times. Like can you relate to that?
It's a cultural issue. I'm from Connecticut and a different social level in society than the people I meet here. Women don't react like this in CT or any other state I've lived.
I've already reduced the amount of time I spend talking to women here, especially those that are single. If the problem continues I'll reduce it even further. That seems to be the only solution other than moving out of the area altogether. While that is my preference it may not be possible for a while due to the economy.
Could be a cultural issue. Foreigners often lump all us Americans into one ball, but there are huge cultural differences all across our country. Having lived in CT and Oklahoma, probably my feeling is that in CT people are really upfront with opinions or how they feel about things and then to talk a lot and fast. In the midwest, it's a bit slower and people are friendly but maybe more formal and not so upfront.
As another poster said above, you do have to remember when at work, you are there to work, so if the conversation is getting beyond the task at hand either with a coworker or customer, I can see them believing your interest may be more.
When I first moved from California to the midwest, I had a lot of experiences similar to yours. I remember standing in line at the grocery store with a full cart and a man walked up behind me with one bottle of ketchup in his hand, so I offered to let him get ahead of me. His response was, "No thank you, I'm married," and his tone was pretty indignant. I'm not kidding! I thought he was a nut until I was at a hardware store a few days later and asked a guy what the odd tool he was buying was used for. He backed away looking a little shocked. Apparently, a lady ought not to ask a gentleman about his tool! I'd like to point out that most people find me quite attractive and these guys were, well, not!
I wonder if this has more to do with people being unable to take a joke anymore. It kind of goes hand in hand with the PC movement.
People anymore do seem to be more distant and cold that even in the recent past. They just assume that, if you are speaking to them, that you have some kind of agenda instead of just saying hi....
As many waitress's do, wear a wedding ring. It's blinding and gets the message across.
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While that is my preference it may not be possible for a while due to the economy.
