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I am a fan of community property. From a legal standpoint, they make divorces easier (no picking through every penny and arguing over whose it is). If overspending is a concern, get a pre-nup, get a lawyer or get a divorce.
All things being equal salaries, household contribution, all spending split. Both work both deposit money into a joint account for "their" expenses.
Should a woman/man be entitled to half of what her/his spouse saved over the course of the marriage?
Theoretically, this makes sense, but in practice, marriage is about partners taking turns promoting each other. You scratch my back, I scratch yours. I support you while you are in medical school, you later support me when I start a business. I drop my career to move 26 states with you for the sake of your big promotion, but then its our money. With your philosophy, this no longer works. Why should I support you while you are in medical school? Maybe you support yourself, and I'll put my money aside for when you become a big-shot doctor and graduate to a trophy wife. Why should you help me start my business? It's not like you would ever see any of the profits. If you get a job in Kathmandu and we pretend only you, alone, "earned" that raise, why should I enable you to get it by moving? And what happens if one of us gets sick? Are you going to put me outside? Or charge me for the funds you spent on me, with interest?
In other words, the arrangement ruins the trust and support that's the backbone of a normal marriage -- either that, or it creates an accounting nightmare for every time your spouse has to do something to enable you to earn an extra buck.
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But I do have an alternative idea that may be made into a prenup: let each spouse take out an allowance. Commensurate with your earnings, but a generous allowance, on, say, a weekly basis. And make that allowance not subject to any reporting, and not subject of any future divorce. Blow it all on baseball cards, if you want, or put it in a bank -- it's yours. I think this is more reasonable and ultimately more fair.
I do have an alternative idea that may be made into a prenup: let each spouse take out an allowance. Commensurate with your earnings, but a generous allowance, on, say, a weekly basis. And make that allowance not subject to any reporting, and not subject of any future divorce. Blow it all on baseball cards, if you want, or put it in a bank -- it's yours. It think this is more reasonable and ultimately more fair.
^^I couldn't have said it better. Cheers to you Redisca.
People are letting fear get in the way of a clean slate. Either they got hosed in the previous marriage and are now bitter therefore feel the need to bring the baggage of the past relationship into the fresh one, which is supposed to be a new beginning. That is very unattractive.
I feel pity for anyone who would agree to such micro-managing in a marriage. How can you love and honor someone with one eye open when you two are asleep?
I am not opposed to a pre-nup, I would sign one if it made sense (for example protecting property that was inherited, etc) and wasn't out of bitterness or panic over something I did not contribute to.
Unless one person was at obvious fault ( cheating for example) then I am all in favour of a completely equal split. For example a housewife might not bring in money but will still contribute greatly in other ways and this should be seen as work - which it is.
Many women will take a back seat financially whilst their husband go to University or train , they cook, they clean, raise the kids, shop, organise holidays, pay the bills , make sure everything is organised and easy for their husband etc...
I never look at a relationship in terms of money but in terms of what is brought to the table emotionally , supportive role, etc...
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