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Not to bash any men here, but many abusers (emotional and physical) can be quite charming in public and nobody suspects anything. Things are not always what they seem... Unless you've been a fly on somebody's walls behind closed doors you ain't got no clue about their relationship!
What I find sad is how much positive, life-affirming interraction there could be in this world if people weren't so afraid and reserved. There are an awful lot of lonely people in this World who seem to be able to connect with other lonely people online. I know, sometimes I feel I'm one of them .
Part of it also is how fast paced things are now. In the real world, you're too busy with work, school, running errands, etc. The big advantage of a forum like this is that if you have something to say, you have everyone's attention. How often do you get that in real life? I could be at the post office and standing in line a few places in front of me could be someone who I could be great friends with. But unless we meet and get a chance to talk, we'd never know it. But online, you can find someone like you.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DennyCrane
Part of it also is how fast paced things are now. In the real world, you're too busy with work, school, running errands, etc. The big advantage of a forum like this is that if you have something to say, you have everyone's attention. How often do you get that in real life? I could be at the post office and standing in line a few places in front of me could be someone who I could be great friends with. But unless we meet and get a chance to talk, we'd never know it. But online, you can find someone like you.
I've made good online friends from forums. While I've never seen them face to face, some of them are as good friends to me as my real friends.
I'm a woman and I myself have wondered why men choose to post in the relationships forum. It seems strange to say the least. Nevertheless I am not saying that theres anything wrong with them, just that in real life this type of behavior would be unheard of. I mean that like you're at work and guys are talking about relationships next to the watercooler. It just doesnt happen very often. So I'm happy there are men smart and brave enough to post here, at least in anonymity.
I think it's very refreshing to hear guy's opinions about relationships. Some of the guys on here have given great advice to the posters. Mostly, it's just reinforced my belief that there are a lot of good guys out there.
I'm a woman and I myself have wondered why men choose to post in the relationships forum. It seems strange to say the least. Nevertheless I am not saying that theres anything wrong with them, just that in real life this type of behavior would be unheard of. I mean that like you're at work and guys are talking about relationships next to the watercooler. It just doesnt happen very often. So I'm happy there are men smart and brave enough to post here, at least in anonymity.
It happens, but women aren't allowed into the discussions.
My co-worker and I have had some real meaningful discussions on relationships and our women. He's been a real voice of reason when I'm over here going crazy.
The OP would probably discover that there are lot's of men in real life that are just as articulate and charismatic as others who are online. Let's face it, how often do some of the topics we discuss here on C-D come up in normal everyday conversations at the office? It's not so easy to casually ask your cube-mate what their opinions are on some of the topics we discuss here in a somewhat anonymous forum. You know how it's sometimes easier to share your problems with a complete stranger than those closest to you? Same applies online. You have a faceless (or not) person who lives 1,000 miles who you have no fear of judging you, so it is somewhat easier to let your thoughts flow freely. No strange looks, no one eaves dropping on your conversations (how many times have you relucted to discuss something with someone at work because someone else will be listening in?), no interruptions. You also have the gift of the backspace key, so you can catch yourself before you post something stupid (apparently not all of us have discovered the backspace key), in real life there is no backspace key, you say something stupid and it's out there.
An awesome and insightful post!
First, most men are probably capable of talking about this kind of stuff, but cannot do so in an office setting where it would create tension and the possibility of a harassment situation.
Second, I can speak on a variety of subjects...from this one to cars to real estate to the economy and on and on...
Third, I am "hit on" in social and work settings and am not interested in the type of women that "hit on" me. There is only one lady at work I find interesting and whose demographics are very similar to mine and, even though she has never been married, she has been in a steady relationship with some guy for numerous years according to reports from co-workers.
Fourth, I am amazed that women, in general, process things so differently than men do, so it's an "eye opening" gift that keeps on giving.
I'm a woman and I myself have wondered why men choose to post in the relationships forum. It seems strange to say the least. Nevertheless I am not saying that theres anything wrong with them, just that in real life this type of behavior would be unheard of. I mean that like you're at work and guys are talking about relationships next to the watercooler. It just doesnt happen very often. So I'm happy there are men smart and brave enough to post here, at least in anonymity.
Hmmm, why is men posting in here so unusual? I'm bout as "man" as it gets and my freinds and I talk about relationships and personal male/female interaction subjects all the time. And not in the stereotypical Al Bundy ooga booga chest thumping way either. I didn't realize that this was considered outside the norm. Of course I don't work in an office, or hang out around water coolers and such. My co workers and I are outside doing the "manly" kind of hand blistering work. Construction and cattle is da biz. Hell, some of our conversations get pretty deep....like I said, I didn't think it was all that abnormal. Maybe it's just cus we are older guys....who knows..............
Hmmm, why is men posting in here so unusual? I'm bout as "man" as it gets and my freinds and I talk about relationships and personal male/female interaction subjects all the time. And not in the stereotypical Al Bundy ooga booga chest thumping way either. I didn't realize that this was considered outside the norm. Of course I don't work in an office, or hang out around water coolers and such. My co workers and I are outside doing the "manly" kind of hand blistering work. Construction and cattle is da biz. Hell, some of our conversations get pretty deep....like I said, I didn't think it was all that abnormal. Maybe it's just cus we are older guys....who knows..............
I have male friends I talk to about relationship matters. They are not lacking in opinion on anything that I might say regarding male and female relations. However, I was surprised when I came here that so many men were just waiting for someone to ask them something. I always thought men talked about this subject only when a woman wanted to talk about it. It really surprised me to see that men took this stuff almost as serious as talking about football, or hunting. I guess I assumed that men talked about it with their female friends, but were unwilling to discuss it as a topic of everday interest. So I was surprised.
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