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Raise a woman to be an object, and she'll act like one.
I think parents in the US are virtually powerless to prevent their daughters from being materialistic as hell. The influence from friends, TV, magazines, etc. is overwhelming. A close relative of mine, age 15 and raised in a frugal household, is miserable if she's not wearing brand names. She'd rather sulk than do anything that's not $$$. She sulks a lot. No doubt she'll be on the lookout for a sugar daddy someday.
Yes, but some folk need to stop nagging about how evil women are and how they just want to get knocked up have a huge expensive wedding and have him work like a borrowed mule just to shower her with every materalistic trinket she desires while she sits on her lazy bon bon eating arse for 10 yr. at which time she will divorce him and take at least 1/2 of everthing the poor poor selfless man has worked for.
If so many men are suffering at the hands of these evil creatures, why lord, oh why do these men get married.
I think parents in the US are virtually powerless to prevent their daughters from being materialistic as hell. The influence from friends, TV, magazines, etc. is overwhelming. A close relative of mine, age 15 and raised in a frugal household, is miserable if she's not wearing brand names. She'd rather sulk than do anything that's not $$$. She sulks a lot. No doubt she'll be on the lookout for a sugar daddy someday.
I grew up in a very frugal (and poor) society, that was actually WAY more materialistic than the US. Today, I live in an upscale middle-class community, but when there was a fire in our apartment building, the only things people carried downstairs with them were their kids -- not their TV's, jewelry, etc. Owning lots of nice things and spending money doesn't automatically make you "materialistic"; it's the relative importance you place on your possessions and what role they play in your life. Any excessive interest in material things is "materialism" -- even if it is an ascetic's interest mitigating in favor of not buying anything. If you view the ownership or non-ownership of a mansion as the difference between virtue and sin, you are a materialist even if you "virtuously" choose to live in the tool shed. In fact, I would submit that people who are poor or ascetic tend to place more importance on material possessions than those who spend liberally within their means and don't make a big deal out of it. With respect to your story, for what it's worth, I am a big fan of school uniforms and rules against wearing jewelry and carrying unnecessary gadgets to school. Apart from that, being frugal for the sake of being frugal is a form of materialism. If you tell a teenager that she is a better person if she isn't wearing brand names just because she isn't wearing them, you are in fact saying the same thing as those magazines, TV's, and so forth, only in reverse; and in doing so, you are in fact reinforcing the message that material possessions aren't merely enjoyable in and of themselves, but are in fact symbols of status and personal worth. That's how you raise a woman who thinks her life is a failure unless she has a big splashy wedding.
By the way -- and I know I'll probably get death threats for this -- I am mystified by this whole American obsession with home ownership. The belief that everyone must own a home in any economic climate and regardless of personal circumstances (God forbid preferences) and that it is somehow part and parcel of marriage is also an expression of materialism. (And this societal obsession is a major reason why the country is in such dire financial straits right now.) If you say people should buy houses for the sake of buying houses instead of having big weddings for the sake of having big weddings, then you are no different than those who prefer to spend on weddings instead. You merely disagree on the type of "material" that should be acquired.
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Originally Posted by Heiwos
No doubt she'll be on the lookout for a sugar daddy someday.
Ah, the soft misogyny of low expectations. Did her parents raise their daughter to be anything other than "frugal"? How about raising her to be a good student, an aspiring scholar, an ambitious professional? Or did they raise her only to be someone's side-kick? My family was very poor when I was 15, and I wanted nice stuff too. So I worked my [censored] off, got an education and got a high-paying job, so I can pay for my own things, thankyouverymuch. Why do you think this girl's frustration won't propel her to excel academically and professionally, but instead make her a prostitute? Is it because her family raised her to be one, or are you just assuming this because you hate women?
Yes, the typical American teenage girl is materialistic. It doesn't change in adulthood, from what I've seen.
We have a generation of kids who think they need rewards all the time. IMO, this comes from not being required to do things simply to build character and being patted on the back for every little thing they do.
Think back to the past. The family relied on all members contributing and all members were required to contribute. Now children are the focus of the family. They used to integrate into an existing family, now they, literally, reform the family. Morph it into something that revolves around them. It's no wonder they grow up to think of themselves as deserving of anything they want. After all, we tell them they're special from the time they're born.
If so many men are suffering at the hands of these evil creatures, why lord, oh why do these men get married.
Simple, because other men didn't warn them, or they didn't listen. My young son will definitely know the realities of marriage, with no exaggeration. He'll know that, unless he chooses very well and is also lucky, he'll likely have to work twice or more as hard at his career to make ends meet.
Simple, because other men didn't warn them, or they didn't listen. My young son will definitely know the realities of marriage, with no exaggeration. He'll know that, unless he chooses very well and is also lucky, he'll likely have to work twice or more as hard at his career to make ends meet.
You do realize that 40% of women out earn their husband's right?
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