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Just curious what y'all think about this. I just read an article in a Christian mag about this and it makes sense. The author was an independent young woman who believed in hiding weaknesses and not seking help from men but she's rethinking things. She's pondering whether females who are very independent actually end up turning off a lot of good men, who think they really have no need of them (except for the obvious. )
Do many good men WANT to be a woman's "knight" and consider being needed a desirable quality in a woman? And is there a downside or dark side to men whose "need to be needed" is quite pronounced?
We went through a marriage seminar at our church and the author maintained that men want to feel respected. My husband was in complete agreement with that as were most of the men there.
Just curious what y'all think about this. I just read an article in a Christian mag about this and it makes sense. The author was an independent young woman who believed in hiding weaknesses and not seking help from men but she's rethinking things. She's pondering whether females who are very independent actually end up turning off a lot of good men, who think they really have no need of them (except for the obvious. )
Do many good men WANT to be a woman's "knight" and consider being needed a desirable quality in a woman? And is there a downside or dark side to men whose "need to be needed" is quite pronounced?
Well, the author is obviously not talking about a husband or boyfriend.. she is talking about attracting new men.
With that in mind, I'm going to say no.. I definitely don't feel the need to be needed. I am attracted to independent women who can handle their own things without my help. "Needy" is a turn-off.
The author could be onto something regarding an excessively aloof demeanor, though. Women can take their independent attitude too far, to the point that it doesn't seem worth it to make the effort. Being needed isn't important, but if I feel like I'm not wanted, I'm not going to stick around and needlessly take abuse. I'm real sensitive like that
We went through a marriage seminar at our church and the author maintained that men want to feel respected. My husband was in complete agreement with that as were most of the men there.
Men want to feel respected? As in, like, as opposed to what women want, which is not to feel respected? Or feel disrespected? Or something? Platitudes are so confusing.
I'm an independent woman and have had no problems in attracting men. Attraction is based on many factors. I can't pretend to be a needy person simply to fulfill a man's need to be needed nor would I want to. Thus far it hasn't be a problem (and I'm not young!). In every relationship it's important to be wanted and "needed". But let's get a perspective. My life is good, I don't need a rescue. Many men find independent women attractive - for those that do not, he should keep looking!
I would think you would know and deeply understand that by the dating stage in your relationships.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ivorytickler
We went through a marriage seminar at our church and the author maintained that men want to feel respected. My husband was in complete agreement with that as were most of the men there.
no more than women need to be wanted.
very very interesting OP.
it deals with codependency issues and healthy relationships. there is a fine line of interdependence that is healthy and very hard to achieve. we so often go from emeshment to isolation lickity split.
with the older person independence becomes achieveable, and then comes very soon isolation.
the caution of the older person plays a big role too.
the glue is gone.
very very interesting OP.
it deals with codependency issues and healthy relationships. there is a fine line of interdependence that is healthy and very hard to achieve. we so often go from emeshment to isolation lickity split. with the older person independence becomes achieveable, and then comes very soon isolation.
the caution of the older person plays a big role too.
the glue is gone.
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