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So I was at the bar again tonight, but a different one than the one I usually go to; a more upscale kind a place that caters to the mid-to-late 20s/ early 30s crowd.
I was outside on the balcony having a cigarette, and a girl who looked only a bit older than me came out with a martini and a cigarette in her mouth and fishing through her purse. I assumed she was looking for a lighter, so I pulled out my lighter and lit it infront of her. She said "oh thank you" and leaned in and lit up.
So we were outside smoking and it was quiet for a few seconds. I'm usually really shy and nervous about making the first move talking to a strange girl and usually back down, but the instances where I feel I have to, HAVE TO talk to her is when we're 2 strangers alone outside, because I hate awkward silences.
So I noticed she had a tattoo of dandelion on her arm, so I thought it would it would be a funny joke to say, "You're tattoo gives me allergies. Plus its encroaching on my tulip garden. I don't like it."
She snickered and said sorry. I then asked "What made you go for the dandelion for a tattoo?" She talked about how most people go for roses or vines and such for tattoos but she wanted something unique, and liked to blow dandelions when she was a little kid.
I told her an idea for a tattoo I had (a double-headed eagle across my entire back) and that's when the flood gates opened; she went on for a good 2 to 3 minutes about every single tattoo idea she ever had and the ones she still wants and where and such. Once she was done with that I introduced myself and got her name.
I asked "So what do you do during the day?" And she went on and on about her job and her past jobs and such.
We talked for about 10-15 minutes, going back and forth between our smokes and our cigarettes. The thing is, she just kept talking and talking about herself and would not ask questions back about me.
I was hoping she would show more interest in me as we talked longer, but after those 10-15 minutes, an older guy in a suit came out, right up to the 2 of us and said "Hey Sarah. How you been?" and she gave him a big hug, and they just started talking amongst themselves for a couple of seconds, until the girl introduced me to him. We said hi and shook hands.
But the thing is, even while I was standing right there, they were started having their own separate conversation right infront of me, and it didn't look like it was going to end soon because the other guy took off his jacket and started leaning against a table, as if to demonstrate he was making himself comfortable. So I kinda just backed away and said "Sarah, I'll see you inside okay?" She said alright.
So I was back inside. It was a monday night so there weren't that many people, and the only women were with other guys, so after finishing my drink at the bar, I went outside, hoping Sarah was alone again, but she was still with that other guy and I said "Sarah, good meeting you." And she said "Oh, you too." And I was on my way.
So yeah, it sucked getting squeezed out of a conversation by another, older guy, but whatever. And besides, what does it mean when a woman just goes on and on and on about herself but doesn't ask anything about you? I was afraid of seeming like I'd be bragging if I brought up too much about myself.
She could have talked to you because she liked you, or because she was lonely or bored. She might not have asked you anything because she was nervous and it didn't cross her mind. If she were nervous it's a good thing, it usually means the girl likes you.
My advice is that the next time someone talks about themselves nonstop, find a point where you can agree/disagree with them and share information about yourself. If they turn the convo back to themselves again, and keep making it a point to do that, then I would leave them alone, but that's just my opinion.
She could have talked to you because she liked you, or because she was lonely or bored. She might not have asked you anything because she was nervous and it didn't cross her mind. If she were nervous it's a good thing, it usually means the girl likes you.
My advice is that the next time someone talks about themselves nonstop, find a point where you can agree/disagree with them and share information about yourself. If they turn the convo back to themselves again, and keep making it a point to do that, then I would leave them alone, but that's just my opinion.
If this continues for any time, dollars to donuts, she is NPD.
However for now, nervous is as good a reason as any. Far better than haughty or dismissive and many guys for some reason seem to like this abuse.
If this continues for any time, dollars to donuts, she is NPD.
However for now, nervous is as good a reason as any. Far better than haughty or dismissive and many guys for some reason seem to like this abuse.
Yeah, I know! It's like if they act bitchy, it automatically means that they're high quality or something.
But women are like this, too. Many of them are attracted only to a-holes.
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