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A friend I worked with a long time ago, social worker whose daughter was having her first grandchild, when asked if she was going to be the doting grandmother taking the baby overnights, etc said to me: when her feet was in the air, it wasn't MY name she was screaming. Oh hell no. She liked it then, let her like it now.
So if there's more than 1 baby daddy - I can never figure out if that means the father is a baby since the grammar doesn't work otherwise - then she is on her own - she chose to live that way with no prevention, she can learn that there are consequences to behavior.
The reason the men (you know, the person responsible for the other half of the child's DNA) get away with this foolishness is because the women don't require the man to step up. On the woman's part, she needs to assume she's dealing with men who will run like rabbits at mere mention of the word "pregnant" and protect herself. She should use good birth control and be very selective of who she invites into her bed. This is the most responsible way to go about that very irresponsible life choice called "casual" sex. (Personally, I don't think there is anything CASUAL about a process that can bring forth human life).
Oh yeah, something else that grinds my gears about these types of women:
They prefer to date men who have no children of their own. Selfish btches. How are you going to prefer a man with no kids and you have a brood of your own.
I belong to another MB and many of the women on their are baby mamas, some with multiple baby daddies and they prefer a man with no kids over a man with kids.
Just a question because I was called an ******* for not feeling sorry for a few women I know who have made poor choices and birth multiple kids by multiple men. Its always been a rule for me to not date women with kids and i cant see how having multiple children by multiple men was ever a good idea. Discuss.
In this day and age of readily available and affordable birth control, it is atrocious and inexcusable to bring a bunch of children into this world through many partners/relationships.
No pity. Horribly self distructive to them and their kids.
And I never understood men that want to "rescue" these types of women.
Me either. But I find these types of men are all the same. No other women really wanted them so they go find a baby mama to wife up, only to find that she is using him for the $$$$.
That's not what I meant at all. I'm speaking of men that hook up with them to try to be the good guy and the hero for rescuing the damsel in distress with the thought that his deed was so great that she'd love him forever.
Makes me think of a coworker that hooked up with one and married her after two months. He bought her story that she was a good girl now and through with the drugs and drama. They even had a baby boy. She stuck around for a year and then went on with her usual path and cheated and became pregnant from another man and then just took off with that guy.
He was left stuck with all the debt she occured and ended up losing everything and became the single dad that had to move back in with his parents. That poor child of his took it very hard when mommy just took off and abandoned him.
wow... but I agree with the who hero rescuing the damsel in distress thing. I've seen it alot actually. As many single, childless, available females out here, they wife up some tramp who wouldn't know what a condom looked like if it slapped them in the face
I feel sorry for the children that will have to grow up without a strong family foundation, who often turn to gangs and drugs to fill the neglect and void left by their selfish, ignorant parents.
I don't think anyone has the right to judge any of these women. No one knows what kind of relationships they had...maybe they were married or had several long term relationships. It maybe didn't work out, maybe the father dies. Why do people jump to conclusions?
And not all of these kids grow up horribly and end up in prison. Many of these mothers do work hard or go to school to support themselves and their kids.
nine times out of ten its the guys fault things fall apart anyway, (infidelity, violence, etc) And when women are forced to seek financial support from the state, everyone jumps on them while the guys get away unscathed.
Society is built to make the poor poorer, and degrade women (strip clubs, porn, etc)
Many men that judge these women with kids by different dads would have no problem going to a strip club and having a stripper give them a lap dance. Thats is sooo hypocritical .
I'd say save the judgements and let God do his job.
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by phoenixscorpiogirl
I don't think anyone has the right to judge any of these women. No one knows what kind of relationships they had...maybe they were married or had several long term relationships. It maybe didn't work out, maybe the father dies. Why do people jump to conclusions?
And not all of these kids grow up horribly and end up in prison. Many of these mothers do work hard or go to school to support themselves and their kids.
nine times out of ten its the guys fault things fall apart anyway, (infidelity, violence, etc) And when women are forced to seek financial support from the state, everyone jumps on them while the guys get away unscathed.
Society is built to make the poor poorer, and degrade women (strip clubs, porn, etc) Many men that judge these women with kids by different dads would have no problem going to a strip club and having a stripper give them a lap dance. Thats is sooo hypocritical.
I'd say save the judgements and let God do his job.
Okay the lap dancing part. Can lapdancing get a woman pregnant? What is so wrong with playing the field if you make sure not to create any kids and not to get STDs?
The women need to make better decisions on who they decide to RISK having kids with and being more proactive to prevent having kids. "Judging" them is one matter. Now being with them as a mate, every man has a duty to make the wisest decision he can for himself. Speaking as a child of divorced mother who had a couple of stepfathers.
Nothing wrong with getting a lap dance. I don't see how that is relevant.
As to the OP, I don't have a simple answer. I am more likely to pity the children than the mother. I have known girls and women who have had children one or two years apart with different men. Then I know girls and women who have had children with age spans of upwards 10-12 years with different men. It would depend on the context of the situation.
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