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My personal viewpoint is that people who need labels to be happy are going to make me very unhappy in the long run. So I'm at a crossroads, trying to determine whether this is something I'd be better off compromising over, since I may just have a male perspective.
Basically, two girls I'm interested in will constantly discuss things to the effect of, "If I had a boyfriend," and "I just need a boyfriend", etc., and I'm going through some serious cognitive dissonance trying to figure out whether or not I'm putting my hand on the hot stove again.
The only label that matters to me is "exclusive". If you aren't exclusive then it's pretty moot whether or not the term boyfriend etc. is being thrown around.
After that the levels are essentially fiance\spouse which also represent some sort of verbal commitment on the part of both parties. (Just like exclusive does)
Reading through this thread has led me to believe there are many lurkers out there. The posted bad responses seem to get sent to predominantly female members and run the gamut from silly and adolescent to downright sociopath scary. I have actually never had any response to my profile. Lol, hundreds of views, just no responses.. Thats probably because I'm a man and put my sons picture up instead of one of me, making it painfully obvious that I am 'unavailable' , as it were. Not even a nibble from any 'fatal attraction' types. I'm just plain ol' boring I suppose. I never really thought of this forum as a chat room meat market type of web world. Lol, seems the sharks swim in all waters.
Reading through this thread has led me to believe there are many lurkers out there. The posted bad responses seem to get sent to predominantly female members and run the gamut from silly and adolescent to downright sociopath scary. I have actually never had any response to my profile. Lol, hundreds of views, just no responses.. Thats probably because I'm a man and put my sons picture up instead of one of me, making it painfully obvious that I am 'unavailable' , as it were. Not even a nibble from any 'fatal attraction' types. I'm just plain ol' boring I suppose. I never really thought of this forum as a chat room meat market type of web world. Lol, seems the sharks swim in all waters.
This goes back to the "chase" bit. I've had a few women initiate a conversation on the sites when I've been on them, but 99/100 they're not going to even if interested. As they perceive it as being further desperate, or believe the other will perceive it as such.
Which frankly is why the profile views were made to begin with in most instances, you can see who was "checking you out", and then pursue if interested. It's like getting a longer bit of eye-contact in a bar normally. Not a hard concept.
Reading through this thread has led me to believe there are many lurkers out there. The posted bad responses seem to get sent to predominantly female members and run the gamut from silly and adolescent to downright sociopath scary. I have actually never had any response to my profile. Lol, hundreds of views, just no responses.. Thats probably because I'm a man and put my sons picture up instead of one of me, making it painfully obvious that I am 'unavailable' , as it were. Not even a nibble from any 'fatal attraction' types. I'm just plain ol' boring I suppose. I never really thought of this forum as a chat room meat market type of web world. Lol, seems the sharks swim in all waters.
Oh....so thats your son?
Honestly first time I saw your profile I thought it was weird that someone would put up a picture of a young person with a bleeding nose. Really weird, I thought. What happened, did he fall off a horse/ bull?
Labels are necessary so that you and him are in accord as to where the relationship is at and where it is going. If you think its FWB and he thinks its serious, then you need to have a talk and discuss the relationship and straighten out where you are. Labels are a necessity.
Exactly!
So no one is guessing, things aren't ambiguous, or the "I thought that you..."
Just like before people marry...they need to discuss money, if they want kids, etc. BEFORE marriage.
It's not necessarily labels, but defining what one has. If one thinks it's a hot relationship, and they see the other person out on the town with someone else, then things haven't been defined, and it's left up to interpretation.
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Good point.
I have actually never had any response to my profile. Lol, hundreds of views, just no responses
.
. Thats probably because I'm a man and put my sons picture up instead of one of me, making it painfully obvious that I am 'unavailable' , as it were. Not even a nibble from any 'fatal attraction' types. 
I'm just plain ol' boring I suppose. I never really thought of this forum as a chat room meat market type of web world. Lol, seems the sharks swim in all waters.
