Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
So my husband and I have a good possibility of moving to the East Coast. Among other positive things, this also means that we're moving away from both sides of our folks. Now my question relates to "in law" question:
1. How often do your in laws (or your SO's parents, if you're not married) visit you in your new home, if you move away from your hometown? How long would they stay, and how do you deal w/ the fact that your inlaws that would be visiting tend to be on the "controlling", or difficult, side? Yes, from this question, you can pretty much assume that my inlaws are the typical "one child" possessive set of parents: they tend to "hoard" our spaces. blah! I mean, they are known to be so domineering/ stubborn that they really don't have much friends that like them at all.
2. This may sound like a stupid question, but here it goes, because we're newlyweds:
When you do visit your hometown (from your home out of state), how much time do you obligate in spending time w/ your folks?
Location: Everybody is going to hurt you, you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for-B Marley
9,516 posts, read 20,021,735 times
Reputation: 9418
Quote:
Originally Posted by sms0511
2. This may sound like a stupid question, but here it goes, because we're newlyweds:
When you do visit your hometown (from your home out of state), how much time do you obligate in spending time w/ your folks?
That's completely up to the individual, there's no proper etiquette or anything about it. To make things easier, I'd definitely get a hotel. I'd just say we stay up too late or something so they're not offended, thinking you're rejecting their hospitality. As far as them getting into your business, I find it much easier to just come out and tell them. Start with a disarming statement such as, we love you to pieces....and follow up with how you feel. They're not going to break or fall apart. In fact, it often let's them see you in a whole new light and you may end up with a little respect as a result. And if they do get upset, oh well, they'll get over it eventually. And if they don't, oh well, that's their problem.
So my husband and I have a good possibility of moving to the East Coast. Among other positive things, this also means that we're moving away from both sides of our folks.
Congratulations! I believe that's one of the prerequisites to a happy marriage!
Congratulations! I believe that's one of the prerequisites to a happy marriage!
LOL! You made my spit my drink up through my nose out of laughter!! True, moving away from both sets of folks are one of the ways to a happy marriage. I'd be darned if we become the "Everybody Loves Raymond".
make your visitation a Thanksgiving holiday....i phone call every other day will keep them warm and comfortable enough to not have the urge to go visit you too often
Location: I never said I was perfect so no refunds here sorry!
6,489 posts, read 7,188,676 times
Reputation: 29855
Quote:
Originally Posted by sierraAZ
Congratulations! I believe that's one of the prerequisites to a happy marriage!
Ditto....lol...how true she speaks here.....you rid yourself of all those visits announced and unannounced, You separate yourself from the immediate drama and eventually completely. Freedom in it truest form when it comes to not having family in your matters each and everyday!
When we first moved away, once a year was ok. We called regularly. At least every week. It was fine. We were glad to be away and on our own and able to devote ourselves to each other.
After we had kids we tried to stay in touch with video telephone calls, we tried to visit more often, finally we moved back. I wish that we had done so sooner.
2. This may sound like a stupid question, but here it goes, because we're newlyweds:
When you do visit your hometown (from your home out of state), how much time do you obligate in spending time w/ your folks?
I live in the same town as my in-laws so question 1 doesn't apply to me. As for this one, I spend 90-99% of my time with my parents when visiting my home town - my family are the whole reason I visit in the first place. The small amount of time I'm not with them while visiting, I'm with my brother and his wife or with old friends still in the area. I usually stay at my parents house but might spend one night or two with my brother and SIL.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I believe that's one of the prerequisites to a happy marriage!
