I think I met my soul mate...but there is one snag...what to do?? (dates, how to)
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I have been on two dates with this guy I used to know in school. We got back in touch recently and have REALLY hit it off. We are both in our early 30s, never married, no kids. Even though we've only been on two dates it seems obvious to both of us we were made for each other!
Everything is perfect. We click perfectly on ALL levels. We have so much in common, so much to talk about, same sense of humor, etc. I never got along so well with anyone before. And both of us are kind of "weird" so it's not often we meet people we really click with. It just seems we were made for each other. We are perfect together. In all the years I have dated this has never happened to me before where someone fit so perfectly.
Thing is, he lives in New York and I'm about to go abroad for 8 months.
But it seems he is strongly hinting he wants me to join him in New York. He hasn't come right out and said it, but he has said some jokey things along those lines. For instance, he said "Instead of moving abroad you should have moved to New York." He also seems jealous like I might meet another guy and he told me to tell him if I do, and to tell him if I decide to come home early.
He also said he is confused because he wants me to know he is really interested in me, but at the same time he said he is afraid of freaking me out or seeming too eager, since we've only hung out twice.
I'm more than willing to move to NY to be with him, to give it a shot, see how things work out. My life is uprooted right now. I've got nothing to lose. I already quit my old job, I'm putting me house up for rent, etc. Nothing is tying me down where I am. But also scared to tell him that, scared he might freak out. But I know he's feeling the same way! What should I do? Thanks!
Do not, repeat, do not change your plans - go abroad for 8 months and if this is for real it will still be there when you get back. Write, call, email. If you do not go through with your own plans in life you will just follow him around like a puppy for the rest of your life and that's no good for either of you. You would regret it.
I have been on two dates with this guy I used to know in school. We got back in touch recently and have REALLY hit it off. We are both in our early 30s, never married, no kids. Even though we've only been on two dates it seems obvious to both of us we were made for each other!
Everything is perfect. We click perfectly on ALL levels. We have so much in common, so much to talk about, same sense of humor, etc. I never got along so well with anyone before. And both of us are kind of "weird" so it's not often we meet people we really click with. It just seems we were made for each other. We are perfect together. In all the years I have dated this has never happened to me before where someone fit so perfectly.
Thing is, he lives in New York and I'm about to go abroad for 8 months.
But it seems he is strongly hinting he wants me to join him in New York. He hasn't come right out and said it, but he has said some jokey things along those lines. For instance, he said "Instead of moving abroad you should have moved to New York." He also seems jealous like I might meet another guy and he told me to tell him if I do, and to tell him if I decide to come home early.
He also said he is confused because he wants me to know he is really interested in me, but at the same time he said he is afraid of freaking me out or seeming too eager, since we've only hung out twice.
I'm more than willing to move to NY to be with him, to give it a shot, see how things work out. My life is uprooted right now. I've got nothing to lose. I already quit my old job, I'm putting me house up for rent, etc. Nothing is tying me down where I am. But also scared to tell him that, scared he might freak out. But I know he's feeling the same way! What should I do? Thanks!
It's great that you're getting along so well, but it's really too soon in the game to make life decisions based on this. What was your original plan?
PassTheChocolate...I didn't really have any concrete plans beyond the next 8 months. I was gonna spend those 8 months and then take it from there, more or less. My plans are flexible. That's why it seems it makes sense to go spend more time with him in NY. Like I said, I got nothing to lose.
I just don't know how to say this without freaking him out, or seeming socially awkward. He really has to be the one to invite me to move in with him if that's what I'm gonna do. I know he's thinking and feeling the exact same thing though. He also doesn't wanna come off as socially awkward by saying it.
He did offer I could stay with him when I'm in NY though. I had said I'll probably stop by NY on my way back from my trip, and he said "You got a free place to stay."
Don't do it. Spend the 8 months like you originally planned. You have to have your life if you want to have a life with someone else. He hasn't even asked you yet? Use that 8 months to get to know one another better and he will be here when you return otherwise you will develop what looks like needy, co-depenant behavior.
PassTheChocolate...I didn't really have any concrete plans beyond the next 8 months. I was gonna spend those 8 months and then take it from there, more or less. My plans are flexible. That's why it seems it makes sense to go spend more time with him in NY. Like I said, I got nothing to lose.
I just don't know how to say this without freaking him out, or seeming socially awkward. He really has to be the one to invite me to move in with him if that's what I'm gonna do. I know he's thinking and feeling the exact same thing though. He also doesn't wanna come off as socially awkward by saying it.
Then if you feel that the two of you are on the same page, I say why not?
I mean, if you don`t have any other plans, then why not try it?
If you don`t, then you may sit back and wonder, "what if..."
Hey, if it don`t work out, then you know that you at least tried, right? Good luck!
Do not, repeat, do not change your plans - go abroad for 8 months and if this is for real it will still be there when you get back. Write, call, email. If you do not go through with your own plans in life you will just follow him around like a puppy for the rest of your life and that's no good for either of you. You would regret it.
Very true I think you should stick to your plans..maybe he could visit you. And the heart only grows fonder when you are apart...if you come back and he still wants you , go for it. You aren't getting any younger grab life by the reins and pull through!!!!
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