Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
We are our own worst critics. Although, some women just get comfortable in their skin and they never complain LOL - I'm in between, I have good days most of the time where Im quite comfortable in my own skin even though in societies eyes, I'm no where near perfect - Im definitely not ever getting into a bikini again but, Im at peace with myself and what I have.
There are days though where I heavily critique myself but it's mostly not that way LOL
then don't buy the magazines, or listen to what the media outlets say.
the way i see it is thus - either the media inculcate these ideas into women (which women can still dismiss, if they choose), or the media produce this stuff because they know people are willing and able to buy it.
Ok, and you remember that whenever you feel bad about yourself as a man because: you're balding, you're not tall enough, buff enough, well dressed enough, cool enough, not enough of a babe magnet, and your d!ck isn't big enough. Just ignore all those messages you get every day.
Except that women get 5 times as many per day as men get from all kinds of sources, not just magazines.
I tell you why!!! because man are too cought up on their own images of the perfect gf/SO/dw, etc... and forget that real women ARE NOT PERFECT... they have extra pounds here and there, maybe some belly fat, maybe thunder-tighs, maybe small/huge breasts... who cares!!! they love you, they take care of you, and you don't even stop to say: "honey you are pretty" or "you look nice today"
I know I sound bitter... but this happened to me: I am not insecure, nor do I care what people think when they see me... I was dating this guy and we have been going out for about a month or so, we had fooled around, touched and then some, so we finally said enough with the teaseing and we made a date to get it on...
When it came down to be in our birthday suit, he stops!!! and says "wow, I didn't realize you looked like this without clothes" I was like..."WTF? what do you mean?" he goes "well you are fat" hmmm... yeah... I am a voluptuos size 10, I have a tummy, and you had your hands under my shirt just last night.. and you failed to notice?
When it came down to be in our birthday suit, he stops!!! and says "wow, I didn't realize you looked like this without clothes" I was like..."WTF? what do you mean?" he goes "well you are fat" hmmm... yeah... I am a voluptuos size 10, I have a tummy, and you had your hands under my shirt just last night.. and you failed to notice?
"GTFO!!! I'll finish this evening myself "
He called you FAT at a size 10? Day-um, I think "average" in the US is a 14. Was he flawless? Hope you said "I can diet and lose weight but you'll always be an idiot!".
I think, a lot of this post is ridiculous. Everyone has something about themselves they want to change - it's just life. Some people are more ignorant about it than others. It doesn't matter. Hell, I wish I had six-pack abs, straight hair, and an ass to amaze every woman I see, but I don't, so I'll just continue on living and being happy with myself.
If we would just stop focusing on how we look, and start focusing on how we live, the world would be a much better place.
He called you FAT at a size 10? Day-um, I think "average" in the US is a 14. Was he flawless? Hope you said "I can diet and lose weight but you'll always be an idiot!".
No he was not flawles, he was pretty good looking... I just told him to get dressed and leave... the room was paid for, he had paid for it... lol... I just enjoyed my night... at his expense
I will put myself out there and say I genuinely have issues with disliking my body and it's not because I am fishing for compliments. I do compare myself to women on tv, in the media, etc. and I know that I will never measure up, but I also compare myself to women on the street as well. I think its a self-esteem issue that is brought on by the media, but made worse by my own feelings of inadequacy. I DO think men judge women harshly and I often feel I don't measure up. My point in all this is to not assume that these women are manipulating you for compliments. I think women have a ton of pressure on them and I think that the media and many (not all) men make this harder. Women make it harder too. Women are hard on women. It's not easy being a woman in this society. I'm sure I'll get flamed and picked apart for this but it is a stuggle of mine and many women I know.
I agree the media definetly exacerbates the problem, but that said, look at some of the threads on this forum: " 5'3 and 139lbs is Fat", no wonder many women are insecure. I've never been fat, then I broke my back and gained some weight. A neighboor told me I didn't look that bad but I'd have to settle for whatever guy noticed me as the good-looking ones wouldn't date me. This is typical and the criticism I received just for gaining 25lbs, not 125lbs! I have since worked out like a dog because there is a lot of pressure and discrimination that I never dreamed of when I was 109lbs and a size 2. My eyes were opened on how supperficial and just mean some ppl can be, and most aren't models themselves. Now I'm freaked out I may gain the weight back because yes, there is great pressure in our society to look a certain way and if you don't, prepare to be ignored at best. Maybe this is just due to where I live which is known as being a very very superficial area.
Turn on the TV. Open a magazine. Those of us who aren't boyish stick figures with huge boobs are inadequate. And let's not forget, Louboutin says Barbie has Cankles.
If Marilyn Monroe and Jane Russell were hatched today, they would both be reviled as plus size fatties. Hard to believe but it's true. All those beautiful Vargas girls would be thought of as fat too.
That said, I think women are too critical of themselves. Real women have real lives. They work, run homes, and have kids. They have other things to do besides work out 8+ hours a day and eat a carrot and a pickle for their total caloric intake.
We need to accept that we will never be perfect and just be the best we can be. Just like the guys have to accept the keg over the six pack and hairloss. It's real life. It happens.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
and says "wow, I didn't realize you looked like this without clothes" 
I was like..."WTF? what do you mean?" he goes "well you are fat" 
hmmm... yeah... I am a voluptuos size 10, I have a tummy, and you had your hands under my shirt just last night.. and you failed to notice? 
"
I just told him to get dressed and leave... the room was paid for, he had paid for it... lol... I just enjoyed my night... 
