Why do so many women hate their bodies? (husbands, child, sex)

[pitt_transplant]

Yeh...that falls under the "shut up" and "therapy" plan...

lol

[plaidmom]

I love my body because it does great things.

For me it was sports. Doing sports and getting strong and winning. Huge confidence builder. Sometimes I look down at my legs and say "thanks guys!".

Do I look like a super-model. Nope. But that's ok, because they can't run or ride as fast as I can. We all have our talents.

Are there things I would like to change? I'd like to be tall. Just for one day. It might be nice to fix the bump in my thrice-broken nose (but I have other things to spend my $$$ on currently).

[WhistlerMCMLV]

Originally Posted by yellowsnow

Turn on the TV. Open a magazine. Those of us who aren't boyish stick figures with huge boobs are inadequate. And let's not forget, Louboutin says Barbie has Cankles.

If Marilyn Monroe and Jane Russell were hatched today, they would both be reviled as plus size fatties. Hard to believe but it's true. All those beautiful Vargas girls would be thought of as fat too.

Any woman who couldn't hide behind a telephone pole would be considered fat these days. Apparently shapeliness equals obesity.

Originally Posted by yellowsnow

That said, I think women are too critical of themselves.

Ya think?

Originally Posted by yellowsnow

Real women have real lives. They work, run homes, and have kids. They have other things to do besides work out 8+ hours a day and eat a carrot and a pickle for their total caloric intake.

Uh-oh. Let some of today's fashion arbiters hear she's having a carrot and a pickle as her total caloric intake on the day and they'll denounce her for overeating.

Originally Posted by yellowsnow

We need to accept that we will never be perfect and just be the best we can be. Just like the guys have to accept the keg over the six pack and hairloss. It's real life. It happens.

The keg I could accept. But I wasn't thrilled when it graduated to a barrel. So I trimmed it back down to a mere keg.

[LibraGirl123]

Originally Posted by TheImportersWife

As for surgery, I was scheduled for that in my mid-twenties (reduction) but canceled at the last minute. Surgery isn't something to take lightly. And now that I'm a mother, I'm definitely a lot more hesitant about it for a number of reasons: the precedence I'm setting for my daughter, recovery and most importantly, the risks involved.

I can certainly understand your concern over the risks of surgery, especially as the mother of two small children. However, I don't think you'd be sending a negative message to your daughter...I view reduction as more of a medical issue. I have two friends who did it, and they were so glad they did.

[Interpol76]

Because women are constantly bombarded by the media (magazines, reality tv) that they need to look a certain way. Alot of them don't understand that real life isn't an episode of The Hills. Get out there, be yourself, and set your OWN beauty standards.

[Morphous01]

Originally Posted by valeeighty2

I tell you why!!! because man are too cought up on their own images of the perfect gf/SO/dw, etc... and forget that real women ARE NOT PERFECT... they have extra pounds here and there, maybe some belly fat, maybe thunder-tighs, maybe small/huge breasts... who cares!!! they love you, they take care of you, and you don't even stop to say: "honey you are pretty" or "you look nice today"

I know I sound bitter... but this happened to me: I am not insecure, nor do I care what people think when they see me... I was dating this guy and we have been going out for about a month or so, we had fooled around, touched and then some, so we finally said enough with the teaseing and we made a date to get it on...

When it came down to be in our birthday suit, he stops!!! and says "wow, I didn't realize you looked like this without clothes" I was like..."WTF? what do you mean?" he goes "well you are fat" hmmm... yeah... I am a voluptuos size 10, I have a tummy, and you had your hands under my shirt just last night.. and you failed to notice?

"GTFO!!! I'll finish this evening myself "

WOW! That was REALLY mean.

[Morphous01]

Originally Posted by TabulaRasa

Because there is a tremendous amount of money to be made in keeping women critical of their bodies and appearance in general.

SO true!! Forgot about that!!!!

[Morphous01]

Originally Posted by Ladeebug59

Because we are constantly bombarded with size 6 models who have pert perfect breasts, legs, airbrushed flawless complexions, flat abs, bubble butts, long luxurious hair and the best clothes! How can we compete with this vision of The Perfect 10 when we are just trying to make it through to the next day... working full time, raising our children and having such busy lives. It's not real life but we still measure ourselves against this perfect model woman. It's in our magazines, on Billboards & TV. It's starting to change but not enough to make an impact. Lets hope our Daughters don't have to endure this. We have to help change this perception.

Yea, that's what I tried to tell my last GF. The final product, in a way, is not really a real woman anymore due to the airbrushing and digital alterations they make with computers.

[UrbanBlasphemy]

No worries, I'm not in the "parent bashing" mood tonight.

Actually, your story is similar to mine, in a way. Growing up, my parents always called me stupid. I mean, literally, every day, at least every couple hours. My mother wasn't ever that bright, but growing up, she was always in to some kind of drugs. My father, on the other hand, the guy's smarter than most people I know, and expected me to be the same.. so by him calling me "stupid", he thought that he was pushing me to learn more.

Growing up wasn't all that great for me because of a lot of things, but that was one major issue. I ended up following my mother into the drugs and drinking for a long time. Fate intervened, and it's been a little over 13 years since I did any of that, but it's amazing the lasting impact things that people say can have.

Still, I never said it was easy. I still fight everyday with things that I have gone through in the past, and sometimes I feel like I'm going insane.. but, even if I struggle with all that for the rest of my life, I won't give up or give in.

The point I'm getting at is this: Unless it's a true health risk, it really doesn't matter. Personality matters more. How we live our lives matter more. Some people focus so much on their looks that they forget that there's more to life than just that. So when he asks, "Why do so many women hate their bodies", I just have to laugh. Hate is too strong of a word to use..maybe "dislike" certain things, but I've met very few that actually hate their bodies. And it's not just women, men struggle with the same thing just as much..

As the old saying goes, if we were all in a pitch black room, we'd all be the same.

Originally Posted by dvcgal

That sounds so easy to do, but when the focus has been primarily on your looks and weight, it's hard to turn that off! My parents were so weight conscience when I was growing up, that they actually put me on Weight Watchers in kindergarten. Now, my mom was an areobics instructor and my dad worked out all the time so they thought this was a good idea! Looking back, I was chubby as a kid, but NOT Weight Watchers worthy!

I'm telling you this NOT to have you bash my parents, 'cause I will not have that, but I was obviously raised differently from you so it's not as easy for my to tune out and let go as it for you!

[si33]

Once again, well said Urban..