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Polygamy would benefit you (the man). Plus it goes against my religion and even if it didn't polygamy is just...bizarre. But that's another topic. Is the Black race that desperate that you have to resort to polygamy as an option? Sad. I cannot think of one white person that would even entertain that idea, so don't act like Black women are being irrational if they reject it.
Many cultures allow multiple wives. Where you disapprove I can understand why it happens.
If your brother was killed in battle, would it not be OK to bring his wife and kids into your home to make sure they are taken care of properly ?
Maybe welfare and kids being raised without a father would be better.
Some black women will just have to remain single and continue to enjoy all the other aspects of life, because all of them will not marry nor have any children. I think the hardest part is acceptance of your plight. For one who has an opportunity to marry and have children I could not begin to imagine not ever being able to have the opportunity. Steve recommends older men and less requirements. I see polygamy has an option as well, but how many women will want to share their men with other women. This type of relationship requires another mindset and most women will not see this as an option.
Accept being single? Find an older man? Polygamy? Are you really serious? This is exactly the type of garbage being peddled to Black women that needs to be tossed back where it came from. I don't care if you are a Black woman, this is horrible and malicious advice. You are married and have children, but are telling these women they need to forget about it? Notice how you are laying out these lousy options for Black women while following a different path for yourself. Hmmm...
There are many eligible men out there. Are Black women a special type of female that can only mate with one kind of man? Black women do NOT need to remain single unless they choose to do so.
Your posts are superficial which isn't the main problem. You seem to want to lump all black women into one box, as if the majority aren't up to par. I don't have any kids, don't have a weight problem, have never been promiscuous (which I'm sure you can't say the same for yourself but will still expect that of your future mate), am finishing up my education and still young, was raised by BOTH parents who are BOTH educated, went to good schools, well traveled, play the piano and would never give someone like you with such a warped disgusting attitude the time of day.
The trend that I'm seeing with black men is that they expect women to be absolute perfection when it comes to looks. They've been fooled by the Hollywood standard which is really all just an illusion. Most men that seek these type of women are average themselves sadly, as I'm sure you are.
The fact remains there is a shortage of good black men. Men can sit here and type away and deny it but it's just the truth. For that reason my New Years Eve date is a white man who is absolutely gorgeous, kind, and educated. He'd been pursuing me for awhile and I just gave in. I can't sit here and twiddle my thumbs and wait for a nice black guy. Also (I know I'm jumping from subject to subject here) but Black people are so self hating. Just read all of the comments about 'not acting black' as if real Black culture is something to be ashamed of. Black doesn't equal ghetto. Futhermore, when Black men become even semi-successful, their egos tend to get out of control and that's when the put downs of black women really begins as has been demonstrated in this thread.
Excellent post. It all comes down to supply and demand. Since Black men are viewed as a scarce commodity, it increases their demand in a way that doesn't necessarily reflect their quality. Some of these guys develop huge egos and sense of entitlement, while losing perspective on what they are really bringing to the table. On top of that, Black women continue to box themselves in by exclusively focusing on Black men as potential romantic partners. The lack of competition from other men is what has created the current situation.
BTW, your date sounds like a good guy. Have fun on New Year's!
So because it's common you feel the need to accept it and apply toward your life even though the concept itself is completely and totally stupid?
That would be like you walking up to a group of women and saying "I refuse to act like a man because men are abusive, chauvinistic, jackasses"
Quote:
Originally Posted by samston
Again, I am stating a common attitude in society, even if it's misguided.
Can you, or natalayjones, say that this attitude does not exist, outside of your own personal experience?
Sure it exists among the uneducated and the narrow minded. However, why you choose to embrace such a mindset doesn't make sense to me. The only reason I could understand for you to keep repeating that you don't "act black" is because you have an issue with being black...unfortunately regardless of how you "act" there's not much you can do to change that fact.
Last edited by nat_at772; 12-29-2009 at 10:03 PM..
So because it's common you feel the need to accept it and apply toward your life even though the concept itself is completely and totally stupid?
That would be like you walking up to a group of women and saying "I refuse to act like a man because men are abusive, chauvinistic, jackasses"
Sure it exists among the uneducated and the narrow minded. However, why you choose to embrace such a mindset doesn't make sense to me. The only reason I could understand for you to keep repeating that you don't "act black" is because you have an issue with being black...unfortunately regardless of how you "act" there's not much you can do to change that fact.
I am acting in defiance of the common idea, since I just don't like it.
As for having an issue with being black, I have not implied this at all here.
This is BS , plain and simple.
Given the desperate tonation of this 'query' , you should remain single.
Trust me , you'll enjoy it. I fail to comprehend reasoning behind ladies who are convinced they absolutely need an SO to cope/survive. And vice versa. Absolute 'puppet on a string' pulled by society mentality. BS.
Hopefully this 'thread' will cease and desist.
Last edited by etacarinae; 12-30-2009 at 05:28 AM..
Reason: additional information.
I am acting in defiance of the common idea, since I just don't like it.
As for having an issue with being black, I have not implied this at all here.
The idea is only common to those who give power to it which is exactly what you're doing. I don't consider acting ghetto a trait of being black but clearly you do and that in itself says to me that you have an issue with black people. But it's cool with me if you don't want to "act" black as I don't have to date you.
The idea is only common to those who give power to it which is exactly what you're doing. I don't consider acting ghetto a trait of being black but clearly you do and that in itself says to me that you have an issue with black people. But it's cool with me if you don't want to "act" black as I don't have to date you.
There are no proven traits of race, since you cannot infer characteristics based on race. Saying whites are x or blacks are y has no basis behind it.
There are no proven traits of race, since you cannot infer characteristics based on race. Saying whites are x or blacks are y has no basis behind it.
There are no proven traits of race but you keep commenting on how you don't "act" black...so if there is no basis behind it then why do you keep informing us that "acting" black goes against your value system?
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