Violence Against Men In the Home and MEDIA (social, different, difference)

[2mares]

Originally Posted by onihC

Not sure if all that is needed after hearing many stories similar to that one of Brian Banks. All it can take is a woman’s words and tears and she’ll be good to go.

Did you see the video on the page before this one? Really, society, the media, and the law pretty much don’t care for violence towards men.



Ever wonder why women violence towards men is seen so often in sitcoms, commercials, movies, soap operas, and even children’s programs as something cute, funny, heroic, hilarious, acceptable, etc.? People would gasp if they saw it the other way around.

Like I said, have a man punch a woman and you bet white knights would come out of nowhere to save the woman and call the police after beating him to the ground. Have a woman punch a man and it would seem as nothing happened. Do you really see women doing something just like men do for a woman who has a violent man in front of her? Yeah right.

It is irrelevant what is shown on a sitcom or what big media event is being exploited. I really dont see the connection between a false rape case involving a juvenile and the fact that our court system has a procedure for domestic violence and assault charges. I do know, for a fact, what it takes to accuse, prove and use violence in a divorce case and its more than stating so and crying.


You know men are society and the media. Don’t like violence is portrayed change it. I asked you previously, Why do you think this double standard of societal acceptance exists and what is your suggestion to turn it around?

[Doll Eyes]

what women on here said "it was no big deal?" Women get thrown in prison for cutting off penises, slashing men with knives, running over men with cars. Since you watch so much of the "media" you should know this.

[onihC]

Originally Posted by 2mares

It is irrelevant what is shown on a sitcom or what big media event is being exploited.

It shows how society, media, laws, etc. view women being violent towards men. They promote it as something funny, acceptable, etc. If we see it that way, then what’s the big deal about a woman being violent towards a man?

At least you can agree that if a man gets punched by a woman, nobody in the scene does a thing compared to having it the other way around, right? It’s not like women will run and beat the woman up and quickly call police. Society, media, etc. don’t really care if a woman is violent towards a man.

Did you see the video?

I really dont see the connection between a false rape case involving a juvenile and the fact that our court system has a procedure for domestic violence and assault charges

It shows how a woman’s word vs a man when it comes to these things, in this case violence, has more weight.

You know men are society and the media. Don’t like violence is portrayed change it. I asked you previously, Why do you think this double standard of societal acceptance exists and what is your suggestion to turn it around?

The double standard exists for the reasons I already stated. It is portrayed as something funny, cute, heroic, acceptable, justifiable, etc. women who are violent know they won’t face any consequences and won’t have fingers pointed at them so they continue to be that way.

What can be done to turn it around? I wonder. It’s like fighting an uphill battle if women, society, the media, etc. don’t think it’s a big deal for women to be violent against men.

[rogead]

In the real world, violence against men is more acceptable (or, perhaps, less objectionable) largely because men have developed very little in the way of organizational political and social power. Feminists have a long and successful history of organizing and coherently expressing their political and social ideologies. They have been particularly effective at generically defining females as victims, and males as victimizers. Needless to say, no one should have to suffer from the violent behavior of others. Legally and culturally, we do need to start addressing the actions of specific individuals rather than continuing to define domestic violence via gender dynamics.

As for television, it's important to remember that females are the primary demographic market for television programming. That's especially true for TV dramas. The depictions we see are those which programmers (and, indirectly, advertisers) feel are of the greatest interest to their viewers. That often means presenting female characters who are smarter/stronger/more ethical/etc. than are men. The programming which is directed towards a male audience is just as likely to portray men positively and women negatively...it's just that there is much less of that programming out there. Either way, I have yet to see any legitimate evidence which links depictions within the cultural media to personal violent behavior... by or towards anyone.

[2mares]

Originally Posted by onihC

It shows how society, media, laws, etc. view women being violent towards men. They promote it as something funny, acceptable, etc. If we see it that way, then what’s the big deal about a woman being violent towards a man?

At least you can agree that if a man gets punched by a woman, nobody in the scene does a thing compared to having it the other way around, right? It’s not like women will run and beat the woman up and quickly call police. Society, media, etc. don’t really care if a woman is violent towards a man.

Did you see the video?



It shows how a woman’s word vs a man when it comes to these things, in this case violence, has more weight.



The double standard exists for the reasons I already stated. It is portrayed as something funny, cute, heroic, acceptable, justifiable, etc. women who are violent know they won’t face any consequences and won’t have fingers pointed at them so they continue to be that way.

What can be done to turn it around? I wonder. It’s like fighting an uphill battle if women, society, the media, etc. don’t think it’s a big deal for women to be violent against men.

Well you go on believing real life is like a sitcom and sitcoms mold our laws and dictate our behavior. And whine that nothing can be done to change existing attitudes. Hinde under a rock. This is why mens' issues dont get as much recongnition.

[Sunflower_lol]

Originally Posted by onihC

They are not. Ball kick or c*nt busting shouldn’t be funny. Yet, it has been making people laugh for ages in movie theaters, sitcoms, children’s tv shows, etc. I remember being in my hotel changing channels and I ran through a Disney show called iCarly or something that shows her and a friend slapping a boy, kicking him, etc. And everybody erupting in laughter. I was surprised how this is also tolerated in that young age and the message they send. Oh well.

Then someone should have canceled the show. It would be called bullying if it happened at a school. You could have called the directors and stated what you just said.

Originally Posted by onihC

Hhhmpph I see. So I guess that a woman with a knife life threatening a man deserves a kick between her legs or a punch to her breasts in self-defense would seem acceptable too in your opinion.

Sure... why not? Assuming he tried everything, there is no door to walk out and the woman still freed herself and came to him with a knife or attemped to mutilate him then at that point he is in the right in defending himself. If it takes a punch to save his life then I don't see a problem there.

Originally Posted by onihC

Having a woman pull a guy’s hair, push him, slap him, scream at him, throwing punches and elbows, etc. is acceptable since it is not threatening, right? Ok. Ooooh but when it was the other way around?

Well he can report that too and ask for a restraining order.
Lack of respect should be a deal-breaker for anyone. I would just wonder what he saw in her. Most men would have pack their bags right on the first episode like that and never see her again nor deal with that type of drama in a relationship.

[onihC]

Originally Posted by Sunflower_lol

Then someone should have canceled the show.

You really think a show would be cancelled because it showed women being violent towards a man? Yeah right. Just look at people’s attitudes about the subject.

It would be called bullying if it happened at a school. You could have called the directors and stated what you just said.

This reminds me of an experience when I was a kid. There was this girl who always made fun of me when I went up to the board, imitated me, and even slapped me behind the head. One day I just had it and I made fun of her. She pulled my hair and I pushed her back and she fell. She went crying to the teacher and guess who got in trouble? I remember telling the teacher what she did to me but yet I was the one who was wrong simply because I was a boy and no boy should treat a girl like that. Oh well.

I am all for supporting women being respected and no man should raise his hand on a woman. What I don’t understand is why there is no such attitude the other way around. Regardless of women thinking that violence towards men is no big deal, I’ll continue to support the idea that no man should be violent towards a woman.

If a man punches a woman we know white knights will come to the rescue, beat the man up, and call police. If it’s the other way around, nobody gives a care. Why do you think it is that way?

Originally Posted by 2mares

Well you go on believing real life is like a sitcom and sitcoms mold our laws and dictate our behavior. And whine that nothing can be done to change existing attitudes. Hinde under a rock. This is why mens' issues dont get as much recongnition.

Originally Posted by Doll Eyes

Men should stop being violent and then maybe they would have a different 'reputation.'

Here are more reasons why women being violent towards men seems acceptable.

You missed the sitcom example. I am simply stating how the media shows it over and over as something funny, cute, heroic, etc. and if society see it that way then there’s no big deal on being disrespectful and violent towards men really. No wonder people think the way they do about women being violent towards men, it’s no big deal, huh?

Did you see the video? I made you other questions you skipped. At least you have admitted men don't get much recognition as women. We're getting somewhere .

[maximum storage]

I've been a lurker on this site for some time now, but I had to register just to join this discussion. Let me start by saying that I find most of the attitudes about DV here very disappointing. It's a sad commentary about our society at large. With that said, there are some things I want to get off my chest. Don't misconstrue this as a woman-bashing post; I'm about fairness:

Originally Posted by JSizzle225

So you are justifying hitting back? Listen here, I've been hit, kicked and thrown things at. I am a guy, it's not like I'm going to be barracaded in the house...you can choose to leave. Stay gone, too. What's next, if a child socks you in the sack, playing around, you will cold **** him?

I know this is an old post, but I must address it anyway. Women ARE NOT CHILDREN! You can't compare the two. Children (depending on their ages) do not have the mental capacity to know right from wrong. However, women do. Trying to compare the two is actually insulting women...not helping their case.

Originally Posted by Sunflower_lol

I thought feminists were the those going for complete equality. If you were speaking to a true feminist, wouldn't they believe a woman should be hit like a man if she slaps him first?

If they chose to make women as the victims and men as monsters, then these aren't feminists but ''confused ones'' or simply old-fashioned (nothing with this, as long as you're not contradicting yourself... in simple terms stay in one belief).

Not surprisingly, there are feminists (READ: NOT ALL) who are the types that want equality when it's convenient. This is one of those cases.

Originally Posted by rogead

Either way, I have yet to see any legitimate evidence which links depictions within the cultural media to personal violent behavior... by or towards anyone.

OnihC wasn't trying to correlate violence against men between the cultural media and personal violent behavior. OnihC was merely pointing out that there are examples of violence against men on TV that is culturally accepted (i.e. it's supposed to be humorous) as it is in real life. Let's take King of Queens for example:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J_Hk4595YeI
(Skip to 2:99)

Carrie HITS Doug in the stomach and the audience laughs. Would it be the same vice-versa? She did this several times throughout the show (much of which I can't find ) all of which were met with laughter. I HIGHLY doubt it would be the same if it was the other way around.

Originally Posted by 2mares

Well you go on believing real life is like a sitcom and sitcoms mold our laws and dictate our behavior. And whine that nothing can be done to change existing attitudes. Hinde under a rock. This is why mens' issues dont get as much recongnition.

Mens' issues don't get as much recognition because of people with attitudes like yours (and some others here) who'd rather shove it under the rug. Men who do rise up and speak up about this get shut down quickly like in this thread. Unfortunately, many men (such as some earlier in this thread) have been brainwashed to think it's ok to accept the violence as well. I understand this is just how it is and blah blah blah, but that doesn't make it right.

Originally Posted by Doll Eyes

Men should stop being violent and then maybe they would have a different 'reputation.'

Women should stop being ******* and maybe they wouldn't get hit. See how ridiculous both of these statements are?


BTW, it's interesting how onihC posts up a real life video demonstrating people's attitudes (including that of a police officer), and the most response onihC gets is "well, that woman didn't look like she was threatening...it looked like it was acting..."

Also, nobody here ever mentioned how it would be if the woman attacker was much bigger than the guy. Take a 6'0" brawny woman against a 5'5" lanky guy..."But men are stronger than women" doesn't apply here. Would you still feel that it would be ok for her to hit him?

Bottom line: nobody should should hit anybody. Who cares how large the person is or what gender they are? It's simple respect. What is so hard to understand about that?

[2mares]

Mens' issues don't get as much recognition because of people with attitudes like yours (and some others here) who'd rather shove it under the rug. Men who do rise up and speak up about this get shut down quickly like in this thread. Unfortunately, many men (such as some earlier in this thread) have been brainwashed to think it's ok to accept the violence as well. I understand this is just how it is and blah blah blah, but that doesn't make it right.

What attitude? Im saying step up and change it if you dont like what is being portrayed on TV. Im not a man, I dont watch these tv shows so its not my issue. My issue is legally men have the exact same avenue against DV and asult as women do. Use them instead of complaining about some arbitrary person might feel about you or how society views women hitting men on TV.

Mens issues dont get attention because men dont bring attention to them. Perhaps men think it should be easy and they shouldnt have to put any of their own effort into making social changes but thats not how it works. All other groups have had to make noise and sacrifices to change things.

[Huckleberry3911948]

just for the record in this county, CPS did a flip flop on its mandatory parenting classes.
17 years ago they taught violence was mostly male.
now they teach it is 50/50.
what happened? did we change? btw i still got the textbooks for the course in its 2 entirely different formats.