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Well, there ya go. That's your answer as to why he's up at 0300. Not sure why you thought he'd come home at 10 and go right to bed. I get home at 5p and spend the next 5 hours doing whatever it is that needs to be done around the house.
You knew his work schedule when you moved in. If you dont' like it, move. As I said, how can he be disturbing you?? You're not working...you have nowhere to be....take a nap and get over yourself already.
Kim, as I said previously, I LIKE my landlord/roommate and I'm going to work with him. I'm gotten some good suggestions and I'm going to try those first.
I would approach him with the attitude that he likely isn't even aware that he's disturbing you. You won't be able to fix everything, but you might fix one or two things.
So, sometime when you're both around, sit down casually and say, "Hey, there's something I wanted to ask you. I don't know if you're aware how sound travels, and, you know, we keep very different hours. I'm finding that some of the after-midnight noise is waking me up, and I wondered if you mind if maybe I attached a door sweep to the bottom of my door to block noise, and maybe tried hanging a tapestry on the wall that's against the laundry room."
He might just say, "Oh, no, I didn't realize you could hear me."
About the laundry, I think you'd have to spray Febreeze on the actual material to make it work. Do you leave your laundry there, too? What if you started leaving your laundry there, and then a few weeks later said, "Wow, I'm sorry, is that my laundry smelling? If so, sorry. Do you want me to do yours, too, as long as I'm in there?"
Nothing you can do about his behavior with the other things, BUT you can go buy yourself blackout curtains and a white noise machine.
When I worked 3:00pm - 11:00pm, I kept weird hours, too. Swing shift has its perks, because it's the best of both worlds -- you get to sleep late and stay up late, while still being able to get things done during the day if needed -- but the hours are a little funky. I would stay up until 3:00 or 4:00 in the morning and would sleep in until 11:00 every day.
When you work from 9:00 til 5:00, you aren't in bed at 6:00 or 7:00, are you?
Lighten up a little. Wear ear plugs, or play music quietly -- just enough to drown out the noise. A white noise machine might work.
As for the smelly laundry, either suck it up or wash it for him.
He's the one with the job, not you, so it seems like you could adjust your lifestyle more easily than he could adjust his.
You could even get in a 2-for-1 about the laundry by mentioning something, in a FRIENDLY tone, about how the washing machine wakes you up at night. You could say, "Hey, would you like for me to toss your laundry in the washing machine when I get home? I know you don't get home 'til late, and who wants to do laundry at 3:00 am? It sure seems like a lot of commotion to me. I can wash and dry it for you and put it in a basket for you to fold when you get home, if you want."
Then, you won't have to deal with smelly or loud, and if you're doing something nice for your roomie (who minds throwing in the washer and dryer? Folding is the sucky part), then maybe later on, you can mention some other things and get a better reception instead of seeming like a picky jerk.
STT, like most of you suggested, he really doesn't know that he was disturbing me. He brought the subject up himself after I came into the kitchen, although I was up late tonight for another reason. Now I know that he really does care. We will have a brief discussion about it later on. I was on here fretting and complaining when all it would have taken on my part was simple communication.
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