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When I was paying health insurance claims I often had to listen to people calling about their claims and winding up telling me about their illnesses and operations. It was just part of the job. I guess it made them feel better to talk to a disembodied voice over the phone because maybe they had worn out friends and relatives with their stories.
The problem was, it took up time needed to spend on the next call as well as getting my other work done like processing claims.
So I would try as politely as possible to tell them I had to be going because I had another call coming in which I usually did or I had to get back on schedule with my work. They would usually say "Okay," and hang up. Sometimes though, they wouldn't get the hint and I would just have to say "One moment please," and put them on hold.
Talk about total strangers telling you about their most intimate medical issues! Some of them were really eager to share every detail and would patiently wait on hold to do it.
I was seated next to someone on a plane who wanted to describe her last operation in detail - I told her that the discussion was making me nauseous and I was going to throw up. That shut her up.
Location: Approximately 50 miles from Missoula MT/38 yrs full time after 4 yrs part time
2,308 posts, read 4,141,372 times
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In response to the original poster's entry back on 6/17/2015 (Post #1) ,, I feel compelled to state how I feel and really don't give-a-damn if I hurt anyone's feelings or not.
I personally am damn sick & tired of hearing repeatedly from certain posters about every detail related to their health problems In some instances, the person involved has some medical condition that certainly is not out-of-the-ordinary for many of us in our retirement years and yet one would think that their particular situation is "rare-as-hell" and deserves to be described (along with all the info regarding office visits, tests, results etc, etc) in explicit detail--------and they treat this Sub-Forum as their own personal Medical Communication Thread
Being in my 84th year, I'll venture to say that "some-of-us" have had a variety of serious...(cancer surgery, orthopedic surgeries, abdominal surgeries, multiple-month-stays in the hospital, etc, etc).... medical problems that we see no reason to write multiple posts about. (Hint, Hint).
I also think that many who occasionally read this sub-form are also fed-up with the posts that I have described, but are too timid to comment and/or state their true feelings.........well folks, criticize me all you want........at least at my age, I can say I'm not a member of "any-pity-parties". See ya!
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I personally am damn sick & tired of hearing repeatedly from certain posters about every detail related to their health problems In some instances, the person involved has some medical condition that certainly is not out-of-the-ordinary for many of us in our retirement years and yet one would think that their particular situation is "rare-as-hell" and deserves to be described (along with all the info regarding office visits, tests, results etc, etc) in explicit detail--------and they treat this Sub-Forum as their own personal Medical Communication Thread
I haven't experienced this on this forum nearly as much as in real life.
In my experience the more serious the condition someone is suffering, the less likely they are to talk about it.
When I encounter someone who either in person or online, within 20 minutes they mention their debilitating condition, I can't help but zone out.
It's not all that different than someone who has a dsyfunctional family situation and thinks their suffering is all that unique.
So I get where you're coming from.
In response to the original poster's entry back on 6/17/2015 (Post #1) ,, I feel compelled to state how I feel and really don't give-a-damn if I hurt anyone's feelings or not.
I also think that many who occasionally read this sub-form are also fed-up with the posts that I have described, but are too timid to comment and/or state their true feelings.........well folks, criticize me all you want........at least at my age, I can say I'm not a member of "any-pity-parties". See ya!
The first did offer one way of handling the op's question. If it works for you.....shrug...fine.
As for these forums, it's not at all necessary to a "hurt anybody's feelings" since the ability to immediately "walk away" is there without depriving the person that gets some benefit from the medical TMI sharing of it.
Hard to understand why you would keep reading the posts from whoever these persons are if they irritate you so
The world can be a lonely place for some people that need a shoulder. Their need might be filled on a place like this by somebody.
The beauty of it is that one doesn't have to be that shoulder if they don't want to without anybody's feelings having to be taken into consideration.
I haven't read through this entire thread, but I've had the opposite problem.
I developed health problems at a young age. I was perfectly healthy until I reached 21, Then, developed rheumatoid disease. Needless to say, I was devastated, still trying to develop my future, now with this thrown in.
Seems my friends and family couldn't think of anything to say to me except medical stuff. Much as I tried to divert the conversation, it always came back to some new pill, or technique, that I was supposed t try. I didn't bring up my health problems, others did. Have you heard about this or that? why don't you try x,y,z? I couldn't eat in front of people for them commenting "you know, I read that----salt, sugar, flour, gluten, tomatoes, etc, etc can cause arthritis."
I hated opening my mail for people sending me articles about arthritis, usually from venerable scientific journals, such as The National enquirer and Reader's Digest
That constant question "how are you feeling today?" If I said I'm fine, I'd get that pity look. Or even worse, "you're walking better today" Suddenly my every move was being rated? Talk about making one self-conscious.
Co-workers, friends, etc coming right up to me and proceed to give me back rubs, regardless if I wanted it or not, and I couldn't tell them NO without them acting injured and insulted.
I got so sick of people dragging me to movies about heroic handicapped people----see, there's people worse than you. Just WTH does one expect from seeing such?I'm going to be sooooo happy to see what I might become in a few years? Hey, then, maybe I can get into motion pictures.
Others ideas of gifts changed. Instead of the same things everyone else would want---music, computer stuff, jewelry, nice clothes, you know, what "normal" people want, suddenly I got books of 'brave, inspiring" handicapped people and their "inspirational lives" like its now my duty to go out and "inspire" people when I could barely get around the house
The worst was when I started getting things like heating pads, comfy cushions,battery-operated gloves for my "poor hands" hey, I was only mid-20's not a candidate for the old folks home Couldn't I have a holiday like everyone else without having my health problems rubbed in my face?
Please, don't think the only thing a person with medical problems wants to do is talk about them
I was seated next to someone on a plane who wanted to describe her last operation in detail - I told her that the discussion was making me nauseous and I was going to throw up. That shut her up.
The fact that you were sitting right next to her and might throw up, perfect....
I'm in my 70s also and have one particular friend who not only whines about what she pays for meds but also tells me about family members who are a pain in her neck. And she forgets she's told you the stories over and over. Thankfully she lives about an hr. away. I have actually put the receiver down and gone to the kitchen and back and knocked on my front door to ditch her. Have caller ID so now I decide if I have time for her calls. She's as good as gold but this makes for a stressful situation and try to avoid it. Her husband, now deceased kept her in check but saw it starting after his death. As for me I keep health issues private and run by them quickly. Will admit I can be a pain in other areas which make me look and feel intolerant.
I'm guilty of discussing recent health concerns here but, because I did I received a lot of positive feedback from folks & may be on the way to being healthier through suggestions from cd folks. So, it's a toss-up sometimes. On the other hand, I've also heard way more than I wanted to from some. Sometimes the best I can do is say, ya, you've said that before.
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In some instances, the person involved has some medical condition that certainly is not out-of-the-ordinary for many of us in our retirement years and yet one would think that their particular situation is "rare-as-hell" and deserves to be described (along with all the info regarding office visits, tests, results etc, etc) in explicit detail--------and they treat this Sub-Forum as their own personal Medical Communication Thread
Couldn't I have a holiday like everyone else without having my health problems rubbed in my face?
