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Old 01-06-2015, 02:00 PM
 
Location: Hampton Roads
3,032 posts, read 4,296,343 times
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Sounds to me like you can't afford to go to the wedding and could just send a congratulations card.
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Old 01-06-2015, 03:04 PM
 
5 posts, read 5,609 times
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As stated earlier... staying somewhere else, especially at the inconvenience of others, is not an option.
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Old 01-06-2015, 04:18 PM
 
Location: NoVa
18,434 posts, read 31,895,356 times
Reputation: 19755
Quote:
Originally Posted by randomlikeme View Post
Sounds to me like you can't afford to go to the wedding and could just send a congratulations card.
I agree with this. Either that or tell your bf nevermind and split with another family member.

In my opinion, since you invited him, it should be at your expense.

If he invited you, would you pay half or would you expect him to pay all?
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Old 01-07-2015, 06:21 PM
 
Location: Wisconsin
19,398 posts, read 21,439,594 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pitt Chick View Post
Boyfriend, right?
He is accompanying you to your relative's wedding; you should pay.

Does he even WANT to go?
What's up with "hinting"? Do you not talk outright?
Great points. If he offers to pay that is OK, but IMHO, (unless you share all your money and your expenses) you invited him so you pay all of your expenses (including the wedding gift from the two of you.).

Quote:
Originally Posted by nikitakolata View Post
I think you need to talk to your bf. Maybe he just doesn't want to go. If you can't afford to pay for the room then I'd tell him you're going to split a room with a family member and he is off the hook. I wonder if money is just his way of telling you that he would rather not go though.
I agree.

Quote:
Originally Posted by randomlikeme View Post
Sounds to me like you can't afford to go to the wedding and could just send a congratulations card.
I agree. There have been plenty of weddings that I wanted to attend but could not afford to attend.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pikantari View Post
I agree with this. Either that or tell your bf nevermind and split with another family member.

In my opinion, since you invited him, it should be at your expense.

If he invited you, would you pay half or would you expect him to pay all?
Since it is such an expensive hotel can you convince your sister to stay at a cheaper place? Or maybe share with a few more people. I remember a wedding where we had four adults and two children staying in the same hotel room to cut down on costs.

Last edited by germaine2626; 01-07-2015 at 06:31 PM..
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Old 01-09-2015, 07:12 AM
 
86 posts, read 86,134 times
Reputation: 92
Quote:
Originally Posted by krisgrey1 View Post
If it were me, I would NEVER expect for my whole weekend to be covered.
If I was in your situation, I would not expect a dime from my date.

If I was in his situation, I would offer to help pay for some of it. Or pick up all the meals on the trip. Sometime to somewhat even it out.
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Old 01-13-2015, 07:24 PM
 
Location: here
24,854 posts, read 33,151,203 times
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I think you should pay. If you can't afford it, go alone, or don't go. Can you split a room with another couple, or stay in a cheaper hotel nearby?
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Old 01-16-2015, 05:47 AM
 
Location: NC
6,032 posts, read 8,439,897 times
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You can dish out $430 bucks for a room and some gas money?

You probably can't afford or budget to go this wedding in the first place. Heck, you can't even afford a set of tires if you happen to have problems on the drive there.
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Old 01-17-2015, 09:04 AM
 
Location: Missouri
6,045 posts, read 22,813,483 times
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I agree it would be nice of bf to chip in on the expenses, being that you've dated for three years. But I do agree that it is really your responsibility and not his, since it is your family.

When men say they want to "take care of" you, their idea of what that means might be different than yours... some are more able / willing to be more generous than others.

If the two of you going together is too much money for you to spend, I agree with what you were thinking in the OP: tell boyfriend that due to cost, you're going to split a room with a family member, and he can just stay home. Enjoy the two nights with family.
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Old 01-17-2015, 09:16 AM
 
324 posts, read 379,754 times
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So you have $430 for accommodations, most likely $100 for the gift, then food and gas. Honestly, while I am generous with my partner, if a wedding was going to run us over $600, even if we shared the cost, I'd skip it and send a card with a gift. It's probably your BF's mindset as well, so letting him off the hook may solve this issue.
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