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Following the problems in the sub-prime lending market in America and the run on HBOS in the UK, uncertainty has now hit Japan.
In the last 7 days Origami Bank has folded, Sumo Bank has gone belly up and Bonsai Bank announced plans to cut some of its branches.
Yesterday, it was announced that Karaoke Bank is up for sale and will likely go for a song, while today shares in Kamikaze Bank were suspended after they nose-dived.
While Samurai Bank is soldiering on following sharp cutbacks, Ninja Bank is reported to have taken a hit, but they remain in the black.
Worse, 500 staff at Karate Bank got the chop and analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal.
Reminds me of a joke told about a meeting between diplomats and their spouses. When an American diplomat was introduced to a Chinese diplomat and his wife, the American decided to compliment the wife on her looks, "You look beautiful."
This was translated and the Chinese diplomat replied with "Na-li, na-li", which is the Mandarin phrase used to put off compliments (politely decline). The phrase means literally "Where?" as in "Where did you get that idea?"
The interpreter, however, did not explain this to the American diplomat, only giving the translation as "Where?"
Red-faced, the American blurted out, "All over, I guess!"
That's the danger of translating word for word. I bet you've heard the one on LKY.
He and his wife went to Taipei on state visit. In the evening he went down to the hotel lobby dressed to the nines; his wife was still getting ready in the room and the limousine had not yet arrived. As he was wandering around aimlessly, a beautiful young lady in evening gown walked pass and whispered to him; they spoke briefly before she stomped off angrily. Just then, Mrs Lee stepped in to the lobby and walked towards her husband. The young lady turned back, snapped at LKY and pointed to his wife: "that one is $50."
The one I heard involved Winston Churchill and some uppity high-so lady. At a party, a bit drunk, Churchill is purported to have said, "Lady XXXX, would you sleep with me for one million pounds (GBP)?"
"Well, Mr. Churchill, I would have to think about that," she demurred.
"How about 10 pounds then?" he asked.
Slapping him in the face, she retorted, "Dear sir, what do you think I am?"
Winston replied, "We have already determined what you are; now we are just negotiating the price."
Location: God's Gift to Mankind for flying anything
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Ok, here one *international*.
Texas Farmer tourist on vacation in Southern Germany.
Tour stops at a quaint typical German Farm.
Texas Farmer asks German Farmer, *how big is your spread* ?
German Farmer:
Well.... from this fence to where the tree line is,
and then along the small stream and then back to here.
Texas Farmer:
My oh My, Mine is much bigger !!
It takes me two days to drive all along my property.
German Farmer:
I used to have an old car like that too .....
american jobs on the lighter side---
for the high stress thankless job owners here you go mr policeman if you practiced good customer service there would be no bankrobberies mr teacher if you practiced good customer service maurice could read and write mr president if you practiced good customer service there would be no 911.
welcome to the land of good customer services skills retirement
welcome to the land of good customer services skills retirement
I thought those jobs have moved to India and the Philippines
Quote:
Siamese twins walk into a pub in Ontario and park themselves on a bar stool. One of them says to the landlord,
'Don't mind us, we're joined at the hip. I'm John, he's Jim. Two Molson Canadian beers, draft please'.
The landlord, feeling slightly awkward, tries to make polite conversation while pouring the beers.
'Been on holiday yet, lads?'
'Off to England next month,' says John. 'We go to England every year and hire a car and drive for miles, don't we, Jim?'
Jim agrees.
'Ah, England!' says the landlord. 'Wonderful country... the history, the beer, the culture...'
'Nah, we don't like that British crap,' says John. ' Hamburgers & Molsons beer, that's us, eh Jim? And we can't stand the English - they can be so arrogant.'
'So why keep going to England ?' asks the landlord.
Bartenders are called landlords in Canada?? Now that is funny!!
Maybe American men should start calling their bartenders landlord also......
Man walks in late at night, angry wife waiting for him by the front door. "Where were you, mister?" she demands.
"I was jush talkin' wit da landlord, honey..." he protests.
One of the funniest jokes regarding this topic is from book about Jokes for Physicists.
Physicist sneaks into his house late at night, wearing his lab coat. Angry wife is waiting for him at the front door.
"Where have you been, mister?" she demands.
"I was out carousing with another woman, drinking, dancing; she kissed me all over, honest." he exclaims.
"Stop lying to me!" the wife yells. "You were at the Lab again, weren't you!!"
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mr policeman if you practiced good customer service there would be no bankrobberies
