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"You are the only Bible some unbelievers will ever read." -John MacArthur
So.....I have kind of officially started dating this guy and he is great at so many things, but he is an atheist. I wanted some advice if possible from a Christian perspective.
He is very intelligent and honest. He has a degree from Brown University an ivy league and a masters in business from elsewhere. He does community service. He is good with kids and kind hearted.
Embarrassingly, I have anxiety issues and he makes me feel so calm in a way that no other guy I've dated has.
His dad and I are very close, he is an only child and his dad has called me the daughter he never had for about two years now. His dad owns a few small businesses and I've worked for one of them for three years. I just started dating him.
So questions:
1, I had known him for awhile so when he first asked me out I stated that I could only date someone if I knew that if we married our kids would be raised as Christian. He instantly agreed that he was fine with that. I was a bit dubious at his quick response so I brought it back up again that he might not have put thought into it and he said that he was raised as a Christian and never really got into it at any level, but would be fine with his kids being raised Christian as he was, because there were some good lessons in it. However, it seems like you have to believe to properly raise Christian kids.
Any thoughts?
2, To show his sincerity he said he would start attending church at least half the time. Do I take him to a Society of Friends meeting house (my preference as I am a devout Quaker in my DNA) or do I take him to the same church that his Presbyterian parents attend and that he attended as a youth to get maybe his family support and some vestigial sentiments toward Jesus that he might have once had there?
All Quakers are different, but he points out that he has a lot of the same beliefs as my religious beliefs.
I am sort of a pacifist and he is similar a non-Aggressionist of sorts (he can better explain his position than me, but that you can't start aggression, but then if someone does you can defend yourself sort of).
I believe in refraining from alcohol, tobacco, drugs on religious grounds........and he already does that.
I believe in community service and giving......he does that too.
3, His mother is a devout Christian and is geeked that I am a devout Christian as she thinks I will bring her son back into the flock so to say. However, after my mom died, my dad turned his back on God and I failed to bring him back so how do I get her to not have high expectations for me in this regard? Also the guy I am seeing is older than me by a bit (he is 29, I am 18), he is very educated, he is very intelligent, and I am not any of those things. I don't see how I can be persuasive.
4, He told me why he was an atheist and said some interesting things I never had thought of before. So then I took the opportunity to show him why I believe and since he already helps others with community service, as I do too....I tried something different than the power of good deeds. I took him out to a beautiful spot in nature and showed him how the sun hit the plants and trees. Then I had him sit in silence listening for God and then kind of did a "Twister" and sat on his lap facing him with my hand over his heart and put his hand over my heart and whispered a prayer in his ear. He said that he actually wanted to believe and may be more agnostic....which I might find more palatable.
Do I keep pushing along these lines or will that push him away?
Sorry for the long post......any advice might be good for me.
Don't overthink it. Many mixed marriages work just fine. If you love and respect each other, you will work out any difficulties that may arise over time.
...sounds like you've got a keeper there... if his issue is with Christ or being a Christian, he can choose from a myriad of 'saviors' who's mythology all profess to be born of a virgin, the son of god, crucified on a cross and all rose from the dead...
What's going to happen is either you're going to lead him to Christ or he's going to lead you to perdition. Why don't you both settle for deism. It's a logical alternative.
I personally believe athiests and fundamentalists are one and the same..... both don't believe the scriptures..... One of my brothers is an atheist and we have a great relationship, so it could work if you respect where you're both coming from.
I knew a wonderful atheist back in the 60's who would willingly give his shirt off his back if needed.
He read the Bible through twice, but today he is still an atheist.
So, it is No wonder to me that God's mind on the matter is found at 1st Cor. 7:39 to marry only in the Lord.
If one is a practicing Christian then the atheist mate would Not be going along with you. You'd be on your own.
For what atheist goes to Christian meetings as instructed to do at Hebrews 10:23-25 __________
What atheist would join you in proclaiming about God's kingdom as Jesus instructed to do at Matthew 24:14; Acts 1:8.
To me a Christian would believe the words found at Luke 14:27-34 to pick up the way of life Jesus instructed.
I knew a wonderful atheist back in the 60's who would willingly give his shirt off his back if needed.
He read the Bible through twice, but today he is still an atheist.
So, it is No wonder to me that God's mind on the matter is found at 1st Cor. 7:39 to marry only in the Lord.
If one is a practicing Christian then the atheist mate would Not be going along with you. You'd be on your own.
I believe you are in error.
1 Corinthians 7:14 King James Version (KJV)
14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
Best to just tell God that You claim Him for salvation into the kingdom of Heaven , and believe that God will make a plan on God`s time , Praying and Never doubting or condemning this plan , as when God connect a couple together then the adultery rule will apply , where God protection will happen ..... So then you should never fight each other over religion , and be quick to forgive and then wait of the Lord is the advise
I believe you are in error.
1 Corinthians 7:14 King James Version (KJV)
14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy.
I see No error given to the 'un-married' as found at 1st Cor. 7:39.
Whereas, 1st Cor. 7:14-15 is addressed to people who are already 'married '.
Married 'before' they became a Christian.
An un-married Christian is to marry another Christian.
For why would an unbeliever listen to the instructions as found at Hebrews 10:23-25 to gather together for Christian meetings.
Those meeting are more like ' survival classes ' in order to come through the coming great tribulation of Rev. 7:14,9.
Best to just tell God that You claim Him for salvation into the kingdom of Heaven , and believe that God will make a plan on God`s time , Praying and Never doubting or condemning this plan , as when God connect a couple together then the adultery rule will apply , where God protection will happen ..... So then you should never fight each other over religion , and be quick to forgive and then wait of the Lord is the advise
Yes, never doubting or condemning His advice as found at 1st Cor. 7:39 to 'marry only in the Lord' (another Christian ).
When a couple connects to God (their marriage vow) the adultery rule applies as does the fornication rule apply.
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