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The bible has many scriptures that warn against sex outside of marriage.
Would love to hear your opinions/thoughts on dating in today's society as a single christian.
Is the celibate person at a disadvantage?
Any other christian singles out there struggling with the conflicting issue of obeying the bible but still dealing with the pressures of sex.
Do you all know of any couples that managed to meet and stay celibate throughout their dating phase?
This is one area I think the Christian church at large is very poor with in my experience. I believe it should be encouraged within church for single men and women to get to know one another. It seems in my experience like there is a chastity.. a corruption if it is clear that you are clearly approaching a lady for the intent of finding a mate and potential wife.
The Bible is clear that no sexual activity whatsoever should be occurring outside of marriage. God has given us these bodies to share with someone else that we are married to and enjoy sexual relations within that union of husband and wife. The end result many times is children, and then they are in a healthy environment to be raised properly in ways of God.
We all have a strong sexual desire and if it's not given to someone in marriage than we are most likely to fall to sexual sins.
A Christian man dating a woman should take heed to his vulnerability. I personally don't believe there should be any intimate contact prior to marriage. Take away the occasion of stumbling knowing the weakness in our fallen nature. Don't give it the opportunity.
The two should really get to know one another well and have a Biblical foundation to build the family unit on. The woman needs to know that they can trust their Man to provide and protect and the man needs to know the woman will respect and support him as the head of the home.
It's not good for a man to be alone. God created a helpmeet for him. It's also not good for woman to be alone trying to take care of children on her own as the ex-husband jumped ship abandoning his responsibilities to his wife and children.
No wonder woman are on the economic bandwagon trying to adjust to be the head of the home. They've lost that trust in Man. Their mind transitions to "I'll just be alone and do it by myself". I'm dealing with this issue right now with a beautiful Christian lady. I'd love to continue to pursue her, but I think she is having trust issues as her ex husband left her for another woman. She's concerned she's going to be worse off than before.. another man leaving her in the trenches as he thinks he's found the bigger better deal. How sad and tragic. Four children and a woman struggling now.
Kind of off topic but stresses the importance of the marriage family unit and sexual relations only within it. Then also a true commitment to be there for one another through good times and bad.
This is one area I think the Christian church at large is very poor with in my experience. I believe it should be encouraged within church for single men and women to get to know one another. It seems in my experience like there is a chastity.. a corruption if it is clear that you are clearly approaching a lady for the intent of finding a mate and potential wife.
We all have a strong sexual desire and if it's not given to someone in marriage than we are most likely to fall to sexual sins.
A Christian man dating a woman should take heed to his vulnerability. I personally don't believe there should be any intimate contact prior to marriage. Take away the occasion of stumbling knowing the weakness in our fallen nature. Don't give it the opportunity.
It's not good for a man to be alone. God created a helpmeet for him. It's also not good for woman to be alone trying to take care of children on her own as the ex-husband jumped ship abandoning his responsibilities to his wife and children.
No wonder woman are on the economic bandwagon trying to adjust to be the head of the home. They've lost that trust in Man. Their mind transitions to "I'll just be alone and do it by myself". I'm dealing with this issue right now with a beautiful Christian lady. I'd love to continue to pursue her, but I think she is having trust issues as her ex husband left her for another woman. She's concerned she's going to be worse off than before.. another man leaving her in the trenches as he thinks he's found the bigger better deal. How sad and tragic. Four children and a woman struggling now.
Thanks for responses. Great statements. Very accurate. I find that many women don't want to deal with a guy that wants to wait for sex. I have not yet met one that was cool with celibacy and waiting for marriage. Even in the church. Definitely not an easy thing to deal with as a christian.
I dated a single mother before so I can relate to your predicament. Once was enough for me. way too much baggage. I think that you should expand your horizons. Lots of women out there in better situations. You should not have to pay for what the last guy did to her.
Best of luck out there man. It's not easy for guys like us. Inbox me if you ever want to chat.
Celebicy is unnatural and very unhealthy, people who practice it don't live as long. We are sexual beings, God made us this way, sex is perfectly fine and something to be enjoyed as long as it is in the right confines. Read the Songof Songs.
Some Christians are celibate because they are reading a message from Paul about Marriage and temptation and it better to remain single, however they are taking the verse out of context. Paul was actually addressing a group of men who were being sexually tempted by Pagan Women, and if they were to mate with them they would be involved in false religions. Paul was saying that it is better to be single than to be married to non Godly women, and if they are sexually tempted (as all of us men are) then they need to find a Christian woman to marry to satisfy their sexual urges. Celibacy was never actually intended.
Ok... Now that we've heard from the standard conservative traditionalist view, I feel it necessary to show the other side of the argument. I personally think the paranoia over all froms of premarital not just biblically questionable, but at times, even downright laughable. Since I don't have alot of time the moment, I'll start with cartoon bears!!! ( discussing the more progressive side)
This doesn't cover everything I'm sure will be brought up, but its a start. If I have time, I'll deal with all the weak or questionable lust, fornication, and one flesh arguments later.
Celebicy is unnatural and very unhealthy, people who practice it don't live as long. We are sexual beings, God made us this way, sex is perfectly fine and something to be enjoyed as long as it is in the right confines. Read the Songof Songs.
Some Christians are celibate because they are reading a message from Paul about Marriage and temptation and it better to remain single, however they are taking the verse out of context. Paul was actually addressing a group of men who were being sexually tempted by Pagan Women, and if they were to mate with them they would be involved in false religions. Paul was saying that it is better to be single than to be married to non Godly women, and if they are sexually tempted (as all of us men are) then they need to find a Christian woman to marry to satisfy their sexual urges. Celibacy was never actually intended.
Pretty sure Song of Solomon was geared toward love between a husband and his bride. Many great examples can be taken from that book, but the context was sex within marriage.
You are a garden locked up, my sister, MY BRIDE; you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain
Songs of Solomon 4:10
Remember there are tons of scriptures in the bible that mention fleeing from fornication.
So if fornication is bad what other options do christians have to release sexual tension and satisfy their urges?
Last edited by usamathman; 03-22-2014 at 07:41 PM..
Ok... Now that we've heard from the standard conservative traditionalist view, I feel it necessary to show the other side of the argument. I personally think the paranoia over all froms of premarital not just biblically questionable, but at times, even downright laughable. Since I don't have alot of time the moment, I'll start with cartoon bears!!! ( discussing the more progressive side)
This doesn't cover everything I'm sure will be brought up, but its a start. If I have time, I'll deal with all the weak or questionable lust, fornication, and one flesh arguments later.
Funny video.
Doesn't make sense for non christians to try and hold themselves accountable to the bible.
The scriptures are there to help christians live their life. Not those who have no belief or relationship
Celibacy before marriage encourages people to take their relationships more seriously. A 25 year old man that is looking for a wife won't waste time on a party girl, because he has no intention of bedding her. I can certainly see the benefit in this.
The negative (particularly in the South) is that SOME younger couples (late teens and early twenties) marry mostly for sex. They care about their partner but once the lust phase wears off, you can end up with someone that isn't really a proper match.
Pretty sure Song of Solomon was geared toward love between a husband and his bride. Many great examples can be taken from that book, but the context was sex within marriage.
You are a garden locked up, my sister, MY BRIDE; you are a spring enclosed, a sealed fountain
Songs of Solomon 4:10
Remember there are tons of scriptures in the bible that mention fleeing from fornication.
So if fornication is bad what other options do christians have to release sexual tension and satisfy their urges?
The LOrd will provide away out of temptation. God knows our desires and attractions and it is not a sin to take a liking to someone they may find sexually attractive. However if we lust after that person or go further it is a sin. God alone is only interested in how we act if we find someone sexually attractive.
In addition another way is not to go to places where you are likely to fall such as not going to strippers, in addition we have a choice to look at porn or not.
The Lord will put new desires into the hearts of New Christians so the temptations to sin will be less and less. Since I been a Christian I don't have desires to live a sinful sexual life I did have. Sure I have temptations at times yet it does not have a hold of me unlike the past.
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( discussing the more progressive side)
