Prayer Request, Please (Sodom, women, believers, prayers)

[janedoe1972]

My fiancé who is 62 (I am 44) is having serious regrets about all his relationships and decisions he has made in the past 35 years. He is depressed that we cannot move (we cannot do so because of many reasons that I choose to not go into). He has chosen to be unhappy and I made the mistake of trying to feel what he feels and it is literally killing me piece-by-piece. I feel like I now have an albatross on my shoulders. I have a job I really like (he is retired), I am very grateful for our apartment and excellent health insurance, I love our son, etc, but it is so not like me to try to feel totally responsible for others' happiness when they have such internal strife. I am asking Jesus to remove this albatross TONIGHT and go back to myself and if my fiancé wants to feel sorry for himself for decisions he made three decades ago, than so be it. I still love and care for him, but NOT at the expense of my mental and physical health.

[georgeinbandonoregon]

may God bless and help both you and your fiancé to make good choices and to love, forgive, and help each other to do what is right. please remember that God may work on His timetable to help you both so I would respectfully suggest you not try to put Him on a precise timetable in this matter or as the Bible says, "be PATIENT and wait on the Lord..." (psalm 37:7). in the meantime you may also consider getting individual or couples counseling---sometimes healing can come (with God's help) through a variety of human sources.


hopefully, others here can give you prayers and other suggestions that might be of help in your situation.


in the peace of Christ.

[MysticPhD]

Originally Posted by janedoe1972

My fiancé who is 62 (I am 44) is having serious regrets about all his relationships and decisions he has made in the past 35 years. He is depressed that we cannot move (we cannot do so because of many reasons that I choose to not go into). He has chosen to be unhappy and I made the mistake of trying to feel what he feels and it is literally killing me piece-by-piece. I feel like I now have an albatross on my shoulders. I have a job I really like (he is retired), I am very grateful for our apartment and excellent health insurance, I love our son, etc, but it is so not like me to try to feel totally responsible for others' happiness when they have such internal strife. I am asking Jesus to remove this albatross TONIGHT and go back to myself and if my fiancé wants to feel sorry for himself for decisions he made three decades ago, than so be it. I still love and care for him, but NOT at the expense of my mental and physical health.

The pinned Prayer Warriors thread in the Religion and Spirituality forum are very sincere and powerful but they may not see this thread.

[PoorInSpirit]

Originally Posted by janedoe1972

My fiancé who is 62 (I am 44) is having serious regrets about all his relationships and decisions he has made in the past 35 years. He is depressed that we cannot move (we cannot do so because of many reasons that I choose to not go into). He has chosen to be unhappy and I made the mistake of trying to feel what he feels and it is literally killing me piece-by-piece. I feel like I now have an albatross on my shoulders. I have a job I really like (he is retired), I am very grateful for our apartment and excellent health insurance, I love our son, etc, but it is so not like me to try to feel totally responsible for others' happiness when they have such internal strife. I am asking Jesus to remove this albatross TONIGHT and go back to myself and if my fiancé wants to feel sorry for himself for decisions he made three decades ago, than so be it. I still love and care for him, but NOT at the expense of my mental and physical health.

I could get that way too. Mistakes made in high school on up, and wishing I knew then what I knew now.

Remind him that this life is temporary and that we are not to treasure the things of this life, especially since we cannot go back and erase our regrets. We have a greater life to go to.. where our treasure is in Heaven. If we could go back, then we might be tempted to love this life more than leaving this life when the Bridegroom comes to take us Home to the Marriage Supper above.

Luke 14:24 For I say unto you, That none of those men which were bidden shall taste of my supper. 25 And there went great multitudes with him: and he turned, and said unto them, 26 If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple. 27 And whosoever doth not bear his cross, and come after me, cannot be my disciple.

Believers often misread this passage of Luke 14:25-33 when Jesus obviously wants us to love others, but this is really about loving Him more than this life and any one in this life so that when it is time to go, we, by His grace & by His help, we would leave willingly this life we hate behind to join Him at the supper above.

Luke 21:33 Heaven and earth shall pass away: but my words shall not pass away.34 And take heed to yourselves, lest at any time your hearts be overcharged with surfeiting, and drunkenness, and cares of this life, and so that day come upon you unawares. 35 For as a snare shall it come on all them that dwell on the face of the whole earth. 36 Watch ye therefore, and pray always, that ye may be accounted worthy to escape all these things that shall come to pass, and to stand before the Son of man.

So the things of this life can be a snare for believers that get caught up FOR the pleasures of this life.

Luke 17:26 And as it was in the days of Noe, so shall it be also in the days of the Son of man. 27 They did eat, they drank, they married wives, they were given in marriage, until the day that Noah entered into the ark, and the flood came, and destroyed them all.
28 Likewise also as it was in the days of Lot; they did eat, they drank, they bought, they sold, they planted, they builded;
29 But the same day that Lot went out of Sodom it rained fire and brimstone from heaven, and destroyed them all.
30 Even thus shall it be in the day when the Son of man is revealed.
31 In that day, he which shall be upon the housetop, and his stuff in the house, let him not come down to take it away: and he that is in the field, let him likewise not return back.
32 Remember Lot's wife.
33 Whosoever shall seek to save his life shall lose it; and whosoever shall lose his life shall preserve it.
34 I tell you, in that night there shall be two men in one bed; the one shall be taken, and the other shall be left.
35 Two women shall be grinding together; the one shall be taken, and the other left.
36 Two men shall be in the field; the one shall be taken, and the other left.
37 And they answered and said unto him, Where, Lord? And he said unto them, Wheresoever the body is, thither will the eagles be gathered together.


So I hope Jesus's words may sink into the ears of your husband and set him free as He lifts his sights higher.


Matthew 6:19 Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal: 20 But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:21 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

Yes, even I need Jesus's help for that to keep my eyes on Him in the midst of my storm in life.

[zthatzmanz28]

Praying hard and long that Jesus heals your situation and brings the comfort that you desire to experience the joy, and fulfillment of a life that surpasses all lives and elevates you to a point of understanding where Christ is your only focus and the Father is your guide as you continue stepping out in faith greater than a mustard seed and deeper than any valley where death has held dominion and power over humanity that allows you to break the chains that bind and crush the head of Satan beneath your heel as you grab LIFE by the arm and usher in a new millennium designed to instill PEACE and LOVE via any means necessary as you accept the liberating freedom that is only found in servitude of Christ.

[RonkonkomaNative]

Originally Posted by janedoe1972

My fiancé who is 62 (I am 44) is having serious regrets about all his relationships and decisions he has made in the past 35 years. He is depressed that we cannot move (we cannot do so because of many reasons that I choose to not go into). He has chosen to be unhappy and I made the mistake of trying to feel what he feels and it is literally killing me piece-by-piece. I feel like I now have an albatross on my shoulders. I have a job I really like (he is retired), I am very grateful for our apartment and excellent health insurance, I love our son, etc, but it is so not like me to try to feel totally responsible for others' happiness when they have such internal strife. I am asking Jesus to remove this albatross TONIGHT and go back to myself and if my fiancé wants to feel sorry for himself for decisions he made three decades ago, than so be it. I still love and care for him, but NOT at the expense of my mental and physical health.

I suggest he get a complete physical and blood work to rule our something physical. He should talk to his provider about his depression. Ruminating over past decisions is unhealthy, and he might need a good therapist. Do not take on his issues. You are not responsible for his happiness.

You can be supportive, but not responsible. If he chooses not to seek help, you should seek a qualified therapist. That person will help you develop a healthy set of skills.

The holidays are often a rough time for people. Be kind. Be supportive. Be proactive.

[DewDropInn]

Originally Posted by RonkonkomaNative

I suggest he get a complete physical and blood work to rule our something physical. He should talk to his provider about his depression. Ruminating over past decisions is unhealthy, and he might need a good therapist. Do not take on his issues. You are not responsible for his happiness.

You can be supportive, but not responsible. If he chooses not to seek help, you should seek a qualified therapist. That person will help you develop a healthy set of skills.

The holidays are often a rough time for people. Be kind. Be supportive. Be proactive.

This.

[MysticPhD]

Originally Posted by RonkonkomaNative

I suggest he get a complete physical and blood work to rule our something physical. He should talk to his provider about his depression. Ruminating over past decisions is unhealthy, and he might need a good therapist. Do not take on his issues. You are not responsible for his happiness.
You can be supportive, but not responsible. If he chooses not to seek help, you should seek a qualified therapist. That person will help you develop a healthy set of skills.
The holidays are often a rough time for people. Be kind. Be supportive. Be proactive.

Originally Posted by DewDropInn

This.

Yes!