Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I was your daughter and finally had to face the fact that I was not going to get a job with any kind of future if I didn't finish the 4 year degree.
You might have to let your daughter come to the same conclusion. My parents hated it when I dropped out of school but I was very hard headed, was unsure of what I wanted to major in/do with my life and was not interested in school.
My advice to you. Tell your daughter that she can drop out if she wants -
BUT she has to get a job and pay rent if she comes back to live with you.
Maybe get her to take some classes at community college to determine some interest.
My parents did the same - attend college or get a job.
She might get lucky and figure out that she needs the degree fairly quickly. If not then at least she will end up with some skills.
I will bet that she will figure out that she needs the degree.
Good luck
It is not the end of the world if she drops out but I know as a parent you don't want her to make a wrong decision.
This is great advice and advice I give frequently. If the will isn't there they won't get that degree, getting to the building won't be enough. Taking that responsibility they need and worrying about them for them won't achieve their goal because it isn't their goal. They first need their own goal to achieve. Sometimes that takes time.
Let them work a year at a job without experience. Let them picture their lives without a degree. You can also along the way take them in to talk to people with degrees and let them see the different life styles each group leads.
As far as a good salary, it's what you make of it that determines your security. I know electricians who are very well off because they are frugal and have common sense and don't overspend. I know college grads with high paying jobs that live in debt and have enormous pressure because of their overspending nature.
The millionaires in this country are surprisingly not the highest educated individuals. They don't have degrees, they own companies in the construction field and spend wisely. They don't waste money on new cars, houses, watches/jewelry or restaurants. They save, put money back into their companies and slowly accrue wealth. It's discipline they have, not a degree.
Life is really what you make it, regardless of the route you take. Making more money doesn't replace the need to be responsible. A good year or two of work might serve them well. If the kid has a passion that needs a degree to become a reality, they'll get one. If not, then they don't need one. Simple as that. It's either a good investment or a waste of time and money.
Currently, I work for $8/hr at a UPS store and just started a part time of $12/hr at a mom and pop's store. Even though they're "dead end", it's not bad working my current jobs because they have changed how I mingle with people. I get to see how my bosses think/live and learn from them, and also learn how to deal with customers. I even pretend that I own of the UPS, so I can teach myself how to manage my own business once I am older.
I had one year of college which is not worth anything but it made me familiar with the people so I can feel safe coming here again and again. I have no way to afford college at the moment but I still read textbooks from the local libraries and attend college libraries regularly. I sit in on college classes and participate in their clubs, and the teachers know me by name (this is at both colleges I sit in on). At home I watch video lectures online on Physics and solve trig problems during free time, simply because I crave it.
My goal: My dream job is to be an aerophysicist who designs aircrafts for the military or NASA. I would also be happy working as a director in scientific documentaries and movies, even though I don't know how to get there just yet. I wanted to join the military in hope that this will give me the spartan discipline and help my education get paid for (I may be wrong). Since I injured my foot and the doctor said that it will probably take two years until I can walk normally again, the military is out of question.
Background: I am 19, was raised in an upper middle class suburb and graduated from a very good high school in the year of 2011 with the GPA of 3.5 and the ACT score of 32. I left home at 18 and I have no family or relatives even though I still talk to a few of my high school friends. I have no degree nor the money to afford even community college, money wise and time wise. I am stuck under poverty level wage and even can't afford food sometimes (I don't qualify for food stamps though). It seems I am stuck in the dead-end-job with no way out, and I don't want to continue like this. I think I've done everything possible to save money, such as living with cheap rent (though I want to get out due to a spiteful roommate), eating at home, and switching to a pre-paid cellphone. I have nothing to sell, I don't purchase anything other than rent, cellphone card, public transportation, and food.
My current assets (I believe): I know basic high school math/science stuff (used to take AP classes). I can also draw. These are really my only assets at the moment that I can improve on to make it marketable. I wish I knew how to teach, but I am nervous to market myself as a math/science tutor out there because I am not confident in my teaching skills (even though I believe I will become a good teacher once I get a hang of it).
I sometimes draw cartoons (for pay) on forums even though I am not that skilled. I find textbooks with medical illustrations, animal references, and machinery designs so I can learn how to do science-oriented illustrations. I was hoping to improve my drawing skills and work for the scientific communities.
To be honest, I don't know what my question is. I don't know what the right questions are to ask. All I know is that I am lost, I am stuck, I know there is something I can do, a few things I can work with but I am braindead for now. I need some ideas. I can give more information throughout the thread.
I'm confused - you should be eligible for financial aid (the real kind, not loans), to pay for school. Have you looked into that?
"My goal: My dream job is to be an aerophysicist who designs aircrafts for the military or NASA. I would also be happy working as a director in scientific documentaries and movies, even though I don't know how to get there just yet. "
You need to go to very good college that have those programs.
yeah, you should be eligible for financial aid like other said. You just need to be fulltime student and with little or no income.
I have 10K in savings that I believe the government will touch if I ever do file for 'need based', unless the criteria is purely based on income. I don't touch my savings. I really, really prefer not to touch it unless I know what I am really doing.
By no family or relatives, it means I am estranged but somehow they still use me on their taxes. I have had the police involved in our family a few times, but I do not know if they qualify as 'documented abused' even though I have a few pictures taken by the cops two years ago and throughout junior high and high school, the teachers and social workers have contacted the child protection service several times (hence constantly moving my school every year). I went to the court this summer to file a restraining order but was told that my family had to actually come into the state in order for me to file abuse (but I only went to one lady who told me this after waiting in line for hours). It didn't matter that my family members were constantly sending me weird e-mails, threatening to find me, and that while I was in college, strangers were sent to my dorm in the middle of the night.
I have the GPA and the ACT score, but I don't have any outstanding extracurricular activities from high school even though I attended a lot of them. It's just that I wasn't the head or the leader in any particular activity.
There are colleges that will offer you full ride scholarships (including room and board) with your GPA and scores. Check FAMU Admissions - Florida Agricultural and Mechanical University 2012
There are probably others. I understand that you don't want to touch your savings, but I certainly would not go without meals if I had $10,000 in the bank.
Some schools have programs to deal with students that cannot go through the FAFSA process because of parent estrangement.
I didn't mention the estrangement waiver because it is so difficult.
Had a father that refused to do the FAFSA verification (I was on a full-ride scholarship, so only needed verification) unless I transferred to UCSD (I was at U of Chicago at the time) and moved in with him and paid rent (along with him deciding my major and registering my classes for me). Even though he had not seen me since I was 18 and otherwise refused to talk to me. Which was fine, because my school assigned psychiatrist had recommended that I have no contact with him and advised the school of this.
Still could not even get a waiver from the FAFSA verification, and I lost my scholarship. Had to sit out of school until I was 24.
I have 10K in savings that I believe the government will touch if I ever do file for 'need based', unless the criteria is purely based on income. I don't touch my savings. I really, really prefer not to touch it unless I know what I am really doing.
By no family or relatives, it means I am estranged but somehow they still use me on their taxes. I have had the police involved in our family a few times, but I do not know if they qualify as 'documented abused' even though I have a few pictures taken by the cops two years ago and throughout junior high and high school, the teachers and social workers have contacted the child protection service several times (hence constantly moving my school every year). I went to the court this summer to file a restraining order but was told that my family had to actually come into the state in order for me to file abuse (but I only went to one lady who told me this after waiting in line for hours). It didn't matter that my family members were constantly sending me weird e-mails, threatening to find me, and that while I was in college, strangers were sent to my dorm in the middle of the night.
I have the GPA and the ACT score, but I don't have any outstanding extracurricular activities from high school even though I attended a lot of them. It's just that I wasn't the head or the leader in any particular activity.
They claim you on their taxes, fraudulently by the sounds of it, but they claim you. That is going to make it difficult to be considered independent and so need based financial aid will be difficult.
The government will not "touch" your savings if you file need based. Your need based aid will just be reduced on the assumption that you would spend a certain percentage of your savings. You can still file and see what you get, you just will not get as much. But... you will need your parents' tax records and their assets and income will count against your need based aid.
You have the GPA and ACT scores to get merit based aid. Don't worry about extracurriculars from high school. If anything, figure out what you would like to do in college in that regard, and make it clear you would expand your activity in that area. But really, extracurriculars are an admissions game that factor into only a few scholarships. The merit based scholarships you will be targeting look at GPA and scores strongly.
The FAFSA is your real problem here. You are very unlikely to get an estrangement exception for FAFSA records. That means you may need your parents tax records. Based on the information you provided, it sounds like it is unlikely they will provide you with tax records.
So, you will have to simultaneously navigate the admissions process and the financial aid process. You need a school that will admit you (probably pretty easy with your record) and will also make the determination that you are independent and allow you to apply on that basis. Independence, in this case, is more important because it means you will not need your parents' tax records. It will mean more need based aid as well, but that is secondary to the tax records requirement.
To do this, you will need to target specific schools; I would suggest schools that are physically easily reachable to where you live now. Let the admissions office know that you are interested in their school. You have the academic record to be recruited. Discuss with them in person why you would like to attend; including that you live near the school. Early on, bring up your family situation. Make it extremely clear that being able to reach independent status is critical to attending their school, and then have admissions put you in touch with financial aid to work things out.
If financial aid clears you as independent (and they can do this before you accept an admissions offer), you are good to go. If they cannot, move on to a different school. You can pursue multiple schools at once too. Go with whoever gives you the best financial aid offer. This is possible.
Location: We_tside PNW (Columbia Gorge) / CO / SA TX / Thailand
34,705 posts, read 58,042,598 times
Reputation: 46172
Quote:
Originally Posted by holdyourgod
Currently, I work for $8/hr at a UPS store and just started a part time of $12/hr at a mom and pop's store. ... All I know is that I am lost, I am stuck, I know there is something I can do, a few things I can work with but I am braindead for now. I need some ideas. ....
OK... The SHORT and sweet...
You're listed ZIP is LA, next to LAX.
so...
1.) TODAY, you get BUSY and find the local aerospace employers / subcontractors in your neighborhood. Library / worksource can give U this data
2.) research them and their employement needs
3.) take the FREE bank of skills tests offered at Worksource
4.) Look for ANY opportunity to engage with local industry / employers
5.) get an informational interview with a few of them, specifically looking into what jobs you could fill that would lead towards your goals.
6.) Get a NIGHT shift job with one of them (nights is FAR better for QUICK mobility / learning / skill building / responsibility / and going to school days.)
7.) As you get engaged in a career that PAYS for your school AND provides valuable OJT and pays you WELL,,,
8.) Plot a path to excel... (maybe ROTC, or maybe finish degree and enter military as an officer, maybe private sector growth path.
9.) FINISH something (OJT, Apprenticeship, school, Cad Cam classes, projects, inventions...)
10.) get connected to groups that will mentor / educate you for you next steps.
there... 5 minute lesson for a 5 - 40 yr career transjectory.
Not EZ, but very possible. I did the identical thing, but at age 17 (when I left home). By 18 I was a fulltime college student and fulltime worker bee (nights) and a fulltime caregiver for a disabled parent. By 19 I had bought my first house, completed an AAS, was engaged in a very demanding technical apprenticeship, also a professional degree program (and a caregiver). For 30+ yrs I did the same and had MANY great opportunities and learnings (especially about being a caregiver for a parent.) I made REALLY good money and provided as a single earner for family and home schooled my kids (and continued to be a caregiver).
Don't be stuck, LOTS of opportunities. I would get that night shift job as a CNC machinist (or an operator for now). You will be making $25+ / hr in 2 yrs and in GREAT demand (USA is offering Green cards for CNC machinists and programmers). It is really fun and creative to do, and right up the alley of an aerospace career. (Hint: U will make 10x the good design decisions if you work your way through the trades on the way to becoming a designer.
Not ez... but this carousel of life does not get any ezr to jump on than when U R age 18.
Be adventurous, listen to others, seek to learn, have fun. The rest will come 'naturally'.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
If the kid has a passion that needs a degree to become a reality, they'll get one. If not, then they don't need one. Simple as that. It's either a good investment or a waste of time and money.
