Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I have to agree, eastern Connecticut is not as bad as some people make it out to be. That is particularly true in the greater Hartford area where the regions best shopping district exists as well as a number of wonderful towns like Glastonbury, South Windsor, Tollan, Bolton, Marlborough and Hebron. There are many others. A lot depends on what you like in a town. While I understand your concerns, I think you need to worry less about people's feelings of your domestic situation and concentrate more on finding a town that you like. Most people will not care as long as you are not in their face with it. People here are very respectful of others.
I do encourage you to look into the towns recommended (except for New Haven which is too far and not what you are looking for). Good luck, Jay
Wavehunter- really ? you make it sound like eastern CT is a slightly more genteel version of Deliverance.
I agree that the much more densely populated New Haven area may be a better fit for for the OP. However, she has an offer for employment at UCONN.
Eastern CT is hardly a wasteland - you can find anything there that you would want, just in a smaller version based upon the small population. Recreational activities ?? -- all the state forests, parks, lakes, reservoirs you could want for hiking, kayaking, camping, swimming etc.
There is an eastern CT Art Guild with many galleries, lots of local organic farms for meats and veggies. The Willimantic Food Co-op is excellent. Williamntic has also transformed one of the old thread factories into an Artscape housing arrangement. Mostly occupied by artists, with public gallery on the main level.
Mansfield has concerts on the green all summer long. Both UCONN & Eastern CT State U have toms of concerts, theater year round. Interested in more serious theater ? Buy a season ticket to the Hartford Stage. It's not all that far into Hartford. Art shows- all over the place.
Basically eastern CT has most of what you can find anywhere else in the state. You just have to do two things- look for it and drive to it. If the OP wants urban, then this is not for her. Due to the small size of the school districts in total enrollment, there may not be the services she needs for her children.
This is encouraging information! Thank you. (And you're right -- the job is at UConn. Period.)
A lot depends on what you like in a town. While I understand your concerns, I think you need to worry less about people's feelings of your domestic situation and concentrate more on finding a town that you like. Most people will not care as long as you are not in their face with it. People here are very respectful of others.
Thanks, Jay. I find your comments above rather interesting. I do feel like most of what we've talked about here is about what we're looking for in a town (arts, activities, independent businesses, progressive thinking, etc), so I'm not sure why you feel like we're focusing on acceptance of our family. But the fact is, the MOST important thing has to be the comfort, security, and acceptance of our family. We are not about to subject ourselves -- and most importantly, our children -- to anything less. I'm not sure what you mean by "... in their face with it..." but we most certainly intend to live our lives openly and honestly. A town is more than infrastructure -- it's community. And belonging and acceptance are what create community.
A town is more than infrastructure -- it's community. And belonging and acceptance are what create community.
Pardon my directness, but this is at the core.
I know some people that frequent this forum do and will disagree with me on this, but I don't think the sense of community that you may be expecting is a common thing in Connecticut, or much of New England. It's very common to live next to someone for 5-10-15 years, give them a friendly hello and maybe a mailbox chat from time to time, and never actually go into their house. It is not expected that someone will treat you like their best friend merely due to proximity of living spaces. There is a reason the reserved stereotype exists.
People won't get in your business and in turn expect you not to get into theirs. It sounds like you are feeling defensive and wanting to live somewhere where people seek out ways to show you they accept you. There is an odd subtext to your post saying you live your life openly, but I don't know what that means? If you are worried about same-sex couple acceptance, you'll find it everywhere in Connecticut - however you won't have people coming over to tell you how much they admire you for it.
I don't think any of the towns suggested are what you are desiring or expecting. And Storrs and the surrounding area is in no way a college town in the way you are imagining.
It is not expected that someone will treat you like their best friend merely due to proximity of living spaces. There is a reason the reserved stereotype exists.
People won't get in your business and in turn expect you not to get into theirs.
I agree with basehead617. That is my experience of growing up in New England. When JayCT says that people won't care if the OP's are a same-sex couple, I think he is saying they will mind their own business. I'm not sure if the OP's consider that enough for "acceptance".
However, unlike the south or parts of the mid-west you will never hear open condemnation of someone's "lifestyle" based on religion. I don't think their kids would be shunned based on their parents either.
OTOH, I suggested living in Mansfield or Coventry because I found small groups of progressive, liberal people among the faculty and graduate students, even a gay pride group. (I did an MA in English.) The OP's may find their community is a small "niche". But UConn has come a long way since I was there. For example, the UConn Alumni Magazine did a recent article of the Rainbow Student Center at UConn: http://today.uconn.edu/blog/2011/11/out-and-about/
Last edited by goldenage1; 07-28-2012 at 07:38 AM..
It is undoubtedly liberal, and people here are extremely tolerant: two mommies would not be anything new or out of the ordinary.
There are outdoor activities galore- there are hiking trails all over the place, and there are reservoirs for kayaking.
The Mansfield school system is excellent, and can certainly accomodate special needs. In addition, the major regional high-school, E.O. Smith, is actually on the UConn campus, and kids can take UConn classes. I advised one freshman who had completed two full years of college credits as a high school student.
In terms of safety, this is an area where kids still ride their bikes around and play outside unsupervised.
What we lack is cultural amenities and restaurants. However, if you have small children, you're probably not going to be going out to eat or to the theater every night. When you want to, you can travel to those.
If you view living in Storrs the right way, it can be quite appealing. You are basically living in the woods, in one of the least-developed areas between Washington DC and Boston, a place where there are many more trees than people, where it is common for people to keep chickens, goats and horses, where your daily commute might actually require an off-road capable vehicle.
This bucolic setting happens to house a major university. In addition, one can be in a major shopping area in about 20 minutes, in Hartford in half an hour, New Haven in about 50 minutes, the ocean in an hour and 15 minutes, Boston in an hour and 45 minutes, and New York in two and half hours.
It's not for everyone, but there are many, many worse places to live.
What turns you off about Storrs Center. It is not even completed yet and brings some much needed retail and housing to a small rural area. That said, definitely consider one of the more mature towns in the area. one of them should be to your liking. Jay
Quote:
Originally Posted by Stylo
Storrs Center will actually be very similar to Blue Back Square in West Hartford.
Honestly, I'm quite miffed about this project. Storrs HAS a downtown a couple miles away called Willimantic. One would think, coming from a "university mindset" they would be into urban renewal and community development and not some created fake town center that was once open space.
Think of what UCONN could do for downtown Willimantic, and if Eastern CT State University joined in, it would be a great little city.
Quote:
Originally Posted by wavehunter007
Based on what your social needs seem to be, what you consider progressive (or open minded), and having an interest in arts, theater…etc…I don’t think you’re going to find it in or around UConn or in the suburban/rural towns in central/northern CT. Outside of Hartford area…the towns in the more suburban/rural parts of northern Connecticut have a long way to go before they are anything close to “progressive, artsy, or colligate in vibe or feel - lol. Most of the towns in northern Connecticut have a increasingly “New England feel “ to them: By this I mean (no offense to anyone) you’ll find people who are generally nice (but reserved and insular), wary of strangers (or things that appear different or “too new”), behind the times to a great deal , and often not well traveled. It’s not uncommon to come across many locals who have never left central/northern Connecticut/New England in their whole life.
Sorry Wave but I think you've spent to much time out in the Florida Sun. I disagree with you on this one.
Quote:
Originally Posted by jj±25374870
Thanks, Jay. I find your comments above rather interesting. I do feel like most of what we've talked about here is about what we're looking for in a town (arts, activities, independent businesses, progressive thinking, etc), so I'm not sure why you feel like we're focusing on acceptance of our family. But the fact is, the MOST important thing has to be the comfort, security, and acceptance of our family. We are not about to subject ourselves -- and most importantly, our children -- to anything less. I'm not sure what you mean by "... in their face with it..." but we most certainly intend to live our lives openly and honestly. A town is more than infrastructure -- it's community. And belonging and acceptance are what create community.
Pardon my directness, but this is at the core.
See below.
Quote:
Originally Posted by basehead617
I know some people that frequent this forum do and will disagree with me on this, but I don't think the sense of community that you may be expecting is a common thing in Connecticut, or much of New England. It's very common to live next to someone for 5-10-15 years, give them a friendly hello and maybe a mailbox chat from time to time, and never actually go into their house. It is not expected that someone will treat you like their best friend merely due to proximity of living spaces. There is a reason the reserved stereotype exists.
People won't get in your business and in turn expect you not to get into theirs. It sounds like you are feeling defensive and wanting to live somewhere where people seek out ways to show you they accept you. There is an odd subtext to your post saying you live your life openly, but I don't know what that means? If you are worried about same-sex couple acceptance, you'll find it everywhere in Connecticut - however you won't have people coming over to tell you how much they admire you for it.
I don't think any of the towns suggested are what you are desiring or expecting. And Storrs and the surrounding area is in no way a college town in the way you are imagining.
Well said. Agreed 100%.
Acceptance is benign in it's very nature, affirmation is not.
I know some people that frequent this forum do and will disagree with me on this, but I don't think the sense of community that you may be expecting is a common thing in Connecticut, or much of New England. It's very common to live next to someone for 5-10-15 years, give them a friendly hello and maybe a mailbox chat from time to time, and never actually go into their house. It is not expected that someone will treat you like their best friend merely due to proximity of living spaces. There is a reason the reserved stereotype exists.
People won't get in your business and in turn expect you not to get into theirs. It sounds like you are feeling defensive and wanting to live somewhere where people seek out ways to show you they accept you. There is an odd subtext to your post saying you live your life openly, but I don't know what that means? If you are worried about same-sex couple acceptance, you'll find it everywhere in Connecticut - however you won't have people coming over to tell you how much they admire you for it.
I don't think any of the towns suggested are what you are desiring or expecting. And Storrs and the surrounding area is in no way a college town in the way you are imagining.
I'm afraid you've misunderstood, but there's no reason to belabor this issue.
It is undoubtedly liberal, and people here are extremely tolerant: two mommies would not be anything new or out of the ordinary.
There are outdoor activities galore- there are hiking trails all over the place, and there are reservoirs for kayaking.
The Mansfield school system is excellent, and can certainly accomodate special needs. In addition, the major regional high-school, E.O. Smith, is actually on the UConn campus, and kids can take UConn classes. I advised one freshman who had completed two full years of college credits as a high school student.
In terms of safety, this is an area where kids still ride their bikes around and play outside unsupervised.
What we lack is cultural amenities and restaurants. However, if you have small children, you're probably not going to be going out to eat or to the theater every night. When you want to, you can travel to those.
If you view living in Storrs the right way, it can be quite appealing. You are basically living in the woods, in one of the least-developed areas between Washington DC and Boston, a place where there are many more trees than people, where it is common for people to keep chickens, goats and horses, where your daily commute might actually require an off-road capable vehicle.
This bucolic setting happens to house a major university. In addition, one can be in a major shopping area in about 20 minutes, in Hartford in half an hour, New Haven in about 50 minutes, the ocean in an hour and 15 minutes, Boston in an hour and 45 minutes, and New York in two and half hours.
It's not for everyone, but there are many, many worse places to live.
My 0.02$.
This is one of the most helpful responses we've gotten! Thank you so much, Adamz. You've broken it down nicely and hit on all the key issues. I was particularly taken with, "You are basically living in the woods, in one of the least-developed areas between Washington DC and Boston, a place where there are many more trees than people, where it is common for people to keep chickens, goats and horses, where your daily commute might actually require an off-road capable vehicle." This is not at all the image we've gotten, and it's quite appealling.
We very much appreciate your reply. Thanks for the info. Very helpful.
I'm glad I could help! You should visit, if possible. I did my graduate work in New Haven, and Storrs surprised me when I came here to interview. It felt much more like Vermont than it did the CT shoreline.
People either love it here, or hate it. People hate it if they are "city people", or if they're 30-something singles- it's my impression that it's very difficult to meet potential romantic partners if you're not a student. People love it if they've always dreamed of living in the country. People with small children also seem to love it.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
